When he says "I love you" - I think, sure you do. And you loved her too. when he says "I never stopped loving you" I look at him like, really? Funny way to show it.
You love me?? Bullshit. You don't want to lose the nice cushy life you have now. You love her REMEMBER???
I remind him that he also lovs her - I know he does/did. I have the F*cking IM to prove it. I take a deep breath and try not to laugh. Or roll my eyes. But I don't say it back. He hasn't earned that back yet. I am protecting my heart. What if he "forgets" again?
I hope it gets easier, I hope I can accept what's happened. I hope I can believe him. I hope he is not still lying to me.
I hope I can be strong enough to love myself. BS (me) - 53
WH (him)- 54
DDay - 3/2/13 - 2:07pm
Married almost 30 years and here I am. heartbroken.
Trying to make it thru each day. And I'm still trying.
Working toward R - At least I am. Not sure what he is doing.