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User Topic: Need a safe playlist for bad days
courageous
Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 8:28 PM, October 18th (Friday)

I'm suffering from depression and I've found that specially when my kids are gone that if I listen to certain songs they trigger a really horrible downward spiral. Today I realized I really need to keep a "safe" playlist ready for when my mood gets dark.

Some examples:

Safe songs:
Will.i.am and Justin Beiber- power
Call me maybe (Carly Rae jespen)

NOT safe songs:
Flood by jars of clay
Damaged by plumb
Cut by plumb
Real by plumb
Beautiful by Bruno Mars
Teenage dream by Katy perry


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 533 | Registered: Jan 2012
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:53 PM, October 18th (Friday)

Music is so closely tied to our emotions. I can understand exactly why you would want to have a safe play list.

So a question? What makes a song safe or unsafe for you? Lyrics? Specific ties to people or experiences in your past? Specific groups?

(((((courageous))))


You can call me NIK

There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox


Posts: 22588 | Registered: Aug 2011
courageous
Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 9:30 PM, October 18th (Friday)

So a question? What makes a song safe or unsafe for you? Lyrics? Specific ties to people or experiences in your past? Specific groups?

That's a good question or I guess I should say questions.

The weird thing is normally a song on a good day has no effect on me but on a slightly bad day if I listen to the same song it causes a downward spiral.

I love flood by jars of clay... My son use to listen to it all the time.... It's basically a song about Noah's ark. Well if you remember about a month ago I got drunk and hit rock bottom.... This was the song that set me off. A part of the lyrics are:

" my mind is crushed by the thrashing waves
Lift me up so high that I cannot fall
Lift me up - when I'm falling
Lift me up - I'm weak and I'm dying
Lift me up - I need you to hold me
Lift me up - Keep me from drowning again

Downpour on my soul
Splashing in the ocean, I'm losing control
Dark sky all around
I can't feel my feet touching the ground
"

I bolded the words that just played in my head because that was what I was feeling like.

The justin Beiber and will.i.am song is safe because the words in it talks about being alive and what doesn't kills us makes us stronger.

Lyrics hit me really hard. I listen to them. If you ever heard the plumb songs (my SO got me hooked on her)
her song cut is about a cutter, damaged is about a woman talking about her innocence taken away as a child from sexual abuse, and real is about a women begging to have value and get attention.

I do have songs associated with people too. Call me maybe is tied to SO I love pink but some of her recent songs are too closely tied to infidelity that I can't handle it any more. Blake Shelton is associated with false R. Rihanna we found love in a hopeless place is a song connected to the A.

I love nickleback. Never going to be alone is SO's ringtone.... Just a side note grenade is exwh's ringtone

Edited to correct spelling.

[This message edited by courageous at 7:58 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 533 | Registered: Jan 2012
inconnu
Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, October 19th (Saturday)

How about Brave by Sara Bareilles or Roar by Katy Perry? They're both upbeat, positive songs (to me).

I also like OneRepublic. Feel Again and Counting Stars always get turned up when I hear them on the radio in the car.


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 11985 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
fireproof
Member
Member # 36126
Default  Posted: 8:43 AM, October 19th (Saturday)

Stronger by Kelly Clarkson

Posts: 665 | Registered: Jul 2012
FaithFool
Member
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 12:58 PM, October 19th (Saturday)

Jump by Van Halen always lifts me up


DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
Celebrating 60 years on Earth

Posts: 16626 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
wildbananas
Member
Member # 10552
Default  Posted: 2:13 PM, October 19th (Saturday)

Make it Mine by Jason Mraz


Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

Posts: 15279 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: Just a Cali girl
Whalers11
Member
Member # 27544
Default  Posted: 4:53 PM, October 19th (Saturday)

I second "Feel Again" by One Republic. That song instantly puts me a good mood. But the lyrics may be triggery for some.

My other feel good song lately has been "Classic" by MKTO. Upbeat pop song...lyrics should be safe.


Me: BGF - 33
Together 11+ years - not married, no children.
D-Day: 2/9/2010
OC Born: 10/9/2010
Status: He chose OW/OC and left immediately.

Posts: 2061 | Registered: Feb 2010
courageous
Member
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, October 19th (Saturday)

I listened to barge and think that will trigger me. I love roar and totally forgot about it! Thanks! the one republic songs were good. I will listen to the rest next. Thanks for your help. Stronger was great during my divorce but I can't listen to it any more


Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.


Posts: 533 | Registered: Jan 2012
BigTeddyPaul
Member
Member # 18448
Default  Posted: 1:14 AM, October 20th (Sunday)

For the past four or five years now I have made a mix tape/cd for Valentine's Day for no one in particular (kinda) just to sort of remind myself of value the relationships (with God, family, friends, non-friends) I have, have had, and have yet. Because of this I have come across a lot of music I wouldn't normally.

1) Bloom by Paper Kites (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8inJtTG_DuU)
2) Sweet Dream by Greg Laswell (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0u_1MAygU0)
3+4) Said the Whale:
Emerald Lake (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PfwGwQic1c) or Loveless (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oSyfW7Ci1E)
5) The Ladder by Andrew Belle (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgJ2wgpT3vY)
6) He is We with Happily Ever After (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mitNR4N-tdU)
7)It's Alright by Matt and Kim (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PilVAqMMSnc)

Phoenix, Macklemore, The Jungle Giants, Cider Sky, Ben Harper, Snow Patrol, Goldspot.


And lastly, my secret grumpy ending song...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iPUmE-tne5U

I can also listen to Frank Sinatra non-stop...but that's just me.


Posts: 200 | Registered: Mar 2008 | From: Sacramento, CA
dignityintact
Member
Member # 32558
Default  Posted: 5:12 AM, October 20th (Sunday)

"Stronger" by Kelly Clarkson

A little predictable, but the words are spot on to lift my mood.


"Sometimes on the way to the dream, you get a lost and find a better one"

Posts: 77 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Uk
Topic Posts: 11