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User Topic: Give me strength...
befuzzled110
Member
Member # 35787
Default  Posted: 7:28 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

I have what I need to take the next step. He's talking to people from Craigslist again. I grabbed a number from the online account and it's not from anyone we "should" know. It's no one he works with. So...Please send prayers and strength this way. I am going to try and hold out until tomorrow when the kids go to school...but I don't know if I can make it that long. I am shaking, my hands are cold, and my heart is beating a mile a minute, not to mention the urge to throw up. And the wanting to cry my eyes out. What a selfish ass.


Me: 37 and awesome
Him: 42 and not so awesome
OW1: 47 and desperate OW2: 34, freshly divorced, was once my friend OW3: is OW1 who took in WH during seperation.

Posts: 196 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Michigan
LosferWords
Guide
Member # 30369
Default  Posted: 7:31 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

(((befuzzled110)))

I'm so sorry...

Sending you strength and prayers. We're here for you.


Posts: 4505 | Registered: Dec 2010
SurelyNOT
Member
Member # 40617
Default  Posted: 7:36 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

Hope you can find the strength to get through this. Sorry I don't have the answers, if only I had a magic wand!!! This is such a struggle, all encompassing and painful.
(((Hugs))) prayers and best wishes to you on your journey.

Posts: 95 | Registered: Sep 2013
5454real
Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 7:40 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

sending not only strength, but mojo and prayers.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with this.


BH 50, WW 41
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 19(Hers),DS 8 Ours, DGS 2 1/2
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2063 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Truly
Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 7:40 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)


Oh crap.

So sorry. Keep holding on. You're doing brilliantly.
Look up at the ceiling and blink rapidly (helps halt the tears).

Good luck ((((befuzzled))))


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 230 | Registered: Sep 2013
befuzzled110
Member
Member # 35787
Default  Posted: 7:58 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

Never mind..Well, not never mind...Just couldn't wait until tomorrow. The thought of him thinking he was getting lucky tonight and the acid turning in my stomach is too much. I just confronted. He didn't deny shit. Just looks miserable. I am so flipping angry right now...


Me: 37 and awesome
Him: 42 and not so awesome
OW1: 47 and desperate OW2: 34, freshly divorced, was once my friend OW3: is OW1 who took in WH during seperation.

Posts: 196 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Michigan
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:17 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

((((befuzzled)))) Sending you strength and comfort, honey.


You can call me NIK

There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox


Posts: 22578 | Registered: Aug 2011
Truly
Member
Member # 40715
Default  Posted: 8:20 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

I bet you're angry right now. I can hear tacks hitting the walls from here!

And now he looks miserable? Poor little diddums. Choices. Choices and boundaries. Bloomin' idiot!
He didn't get lucky enough to realise the gift you offered him was priceless

Stay strong, befuzzled

And yes, you are allowed to be angry!!!!


There are dark shadows on the earth, but its lights are stronger in the contrast.
Charles Dickens


Posts: 230 | Registered: Sep 2013
throughthetunnel
New Member
Member # 41082
Default  Posted: 9:57 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

I am so sorry. Prayers!

Posts: 7 | Registered: Oct 2013
surviving1963
Member
Member # 40393
Default  Posted: 10:06 PM, October 22nd (Tuesday)

On your terms from now on. Sending strength your way!


Me: 50
WH: almost 50 pro cake-eater, NPD, SA
Married 32 years
D-Days 3-4-12, 8-19-12 (EA, probably PA)porn,ashleymadison, etc, etc
4 sons, 3 daughters
7 grandkids
Divorcing - finally

Posts: 96 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Utah
befuzzled110
Member
Member # 35787
Default  Posted: 6:27 AM, October 23rd (Wednesday)

Well, let's see.. I threw the book "How to Help your spouse heal from your affair" at him. No- he has never read it, as he was never approachable to give it to. He picked it up and read chapter one right away. I handed him my ring and said I don't want to wear it. I told him that he will hand over his phone every day. He will give me back the computer. I told him I am done. I am ready to walk and he freaked out- not to stop me, but started to realize (maybe) that he has F-U-B-A-R-ed(fu**ed up beyond any repair), big time. I am at my wits end. At the same time, I just want to crawl under the sheets and hide. I am so exhausted emotionally. Can anyone hear me screaming from where they are??? Lol...


Me: 37 and awesome
Him: 42 and not so awesome
OW1: 47 and desperate OW2: 34, freshly divorced, was once my friend OW3: is OW1 who took in WH during seperation.

Posts: 196 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Michigan
devasted30
Member
Member # 39439
Default  Posted: 6:57 AM, October 23rd (Wednesday)

Okay (gently, very gently) maybe it's time to put your bitch boots on and start walking.
I am so sorry you are back to the beginning again.
Many hugs to you and hoping you find the strength to get thru this.

Posts: 483 | Registered: Jun 2013
Topic Posts: 12