Topic: Venting/ stbxh and inlaws
Member # 40898
| Posted: 10:48 PM, November 8th (Friday)|
Today while I was at work I noticed my iphone had no service but I didn't think much of it. A little while later my F-I-L walks in, I haven't spoken to this man since probably May. I have always tolerated this man but had little respect for him, he has always made my blood boil. Anyway, I calmly said hello. He says he didn't know how to find me (he knows I'm living with my parents because he has picked up DS several times). He hands me a bag and says he is supposed to give it to me. I could see what it was and knew immediately what was going on, but asked anyway, his reply was a phone and your not going to like it, with his stupid smirk. I just took the bag and asked where the key to the storage unit was. STBXH is suppose to pay for mine and DS phone, since we were on the same plan and its in his name, per temporary orders. He turned my iphone off and gave me a cheap GO phone. WTH! I am beyond livid. It may not seem like much but its just another way that he is trying to control me. I am sick of it!
I think it has to do with the fact that DS asked for more lunch money and I said no $20 a week is what was agreed on and if you want to spend your own money that is your decision. STBXH called and said I should be giving DS more money because he sends X amount of dollars. Pretty much I'm suppose to sign it all over to DS. Even my FIL told DS I was getting off cheap because I get X amount from his dad. Again WTH he should not be telling him how much I get for child support!
I also refuse to give the inlaws STBXH visitation. STBXH wants every other weekend, even though he lives 12 hours away and has yet to see DS except 2 hours since asking for a divorce. He only wants this because he wants his parents, who live close by to have his visitation. He even said he would take me to court for grandparent rights. DS is 14 almost 15, I think he is old enough to decide some of this, but they treat him like he is 5. The inlaws are the same people who when DS lived 12 hours away for the last 8+ years only visited once because they always had an excuse. Yet they were able to go down a couple of weeks ago with a uhaul full of stuff for STBXH and meet the OW, who is living in our family home. They also brought back mine and DS's stuff, which I specifically said no to. They love to stir up drama. I have let DS go to their house and talk to them freely, even with all of this shit going on. But I don't know what to do anymore about the inlaws or STBXH. Don't they know how much they are messing with DS head. I'm just at the end of my rope.
me(BS)-34 him(WS)-32 DS-15
Married 15 years
Blindsided with divorce 07-12-13
DD-08-1-13 OW-40ish,married 20 yrs, with 4 kids she abandoned
Divorcing and trying to move one tiny step forward at a time.
Posts: 114 | Registered: Oct 2013
Member # 16958
| Posted: 11:43 PM, November 8th (Friday)|
I''m so sorry, sounds like a tough situation. You would think your inlaws would have more compassion considering how it all went down. At least it sounds like you were never close with them. Have you sat down with DS and discussed his relationship with them and how comofrtable his is with them?
Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Posts: 937 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
Member # 39036
| Posted: 1:38 AM, November 9th (Saturday)|
I'm having in-law drama too. I've found that NC is the only way to go. If I'm not legally obligated to talk to them, I won't. I already tried the amicable route and it blew up in my face. Even after my MIL just insulted me last week she had the nerve to text and email when she mistakenly thought I was bringing DS to town this weekend. I wrote her back BUT DID NOT SEND IT. Had to get some things off of my chest but wouldn't give her or my FIL any more time or attention.
Is it possible to get your iPhone on your own plan? I know it's more $ but it might be worth it just to have what you want and revel at the fact that his dirtbag move has no effect on you.
I personally wouldn't fight it or even comment on it because that is what he wants. To start drama. Let him pay for a phone you don't use.
Me: BS 36
Him: WS 37
14 month old DS
Married 5 years, together 8, DIVORCING!!! (taking forever)
DDay: 3/1/13 (4 Month PA while I was pregnant)
Sometimes all you have to do is forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.
Posts: 345 | Registered: Apr 2013
|Topic Posts: 3|| |