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User Topic: tomorrow's my birthday....
tara1110
Member
Member # 41202
Default  Posted: 5:44 PM, November 9th (Saturday)

It's just a horrible feeling that after dday, there's so many occasions lined up that I would be spending without my husband. Let's start with his bday on 9/7; my son's bday on 11/1 and now my bday (tomorrow)... And then thanksgiving, Christmas, New year...

I know healing takes time... I know I have to feel the hole and grieve over it... I have to move on... Easy to say but so hard to do...

Why am I crying again? I haven't cried in weeks but now I'm feeling hurt and sad and weak and just horrible....

Just venting but thanks for listening....

Please lift me up


Me BS:34
H WS: 28
OW: 33 (butter face... Thanks to sistermilkshake for the nickname)
Dday: July 24, 2013 (5 days after our 5th wedding anniversary)
7yrs together, married for 5 yrs
Status: divorcing

Posts: 86 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: North Carolina
Chippednotbroken
Member
Member # 40170
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, November 9th (Saturday)

Happy Birthday. It will be ok. Maybe even amazing because you don't need to worry about him. You aren't alone there is a whole world waiting to celebrate.


Me BS 32
DDay July 13'
3 young kids

Posts: 303 | Registered: Aug 2013
somanyyears
Member
Member # 26970
Default  Posted: 5:55 PM, November 9th (Saturday)


..(((((((tara))))))))

..try to live just one day at a time and do one thing just for you!

..take a nice long bath, make a special dinner for yourself, buy that outrageous cake at the bakery and put your B-day candles on it..

..invite a good friend over and crack open that bottle of wine you've been saving..

..a long overdue manicure/hair-do/ spa day..

just be extra good to yourself.. spend some quality time with your son at a special place that you know he likes..

..the other special days will still arrive and you can find a way to be kind to yourself on them as well.. take it slow and easy.

..I wish you a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY for tomorrow.

..hope the sun comes out for you and let it warm your soul and heart.

smy


trust no other human- love only your pets
She isn't and never was who I thought..I can't believe who I married and what she did to us.
Me 67
Her 63
Married 42 yrs (together 47)
18 yr LTA with bf


Posts: 4129 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: the sad state of affairs
sailorgirl
Member
Member # 38162
Default  Posted: 8:47 PM, November 9th (Saturday)

tara,

It is terribly sad and it totally sucks to face these special days.

Remember, if you were to stay with your WH, there would be even more sad occasions: new d-days. He is a cheater and he lacks the character and remorse to change. It's only a matter of time before he cheats on his OW because he lacks good boundaries and solid morals.

Plan something special for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. Start a new tradition with your son, get together with relatives, find a new dog friendly park to take your furbabies, get tickets to a show or a game . . . make sure you have things to look forward to.

Are you in IC? Even just a few visits was really helpful for me.

You are not weak. You are dealing valiantly with betrayal--one of the hardest things a person can face. Keep going. Hug your son who is so lucky to have you for a mom. Someday, you will be happy and thriving. You will find a man who knows how to be faithful and is worthy of you.

[This message edited by sailorgirl at 8:50 PM, November 9th (Saturday)]


Married 14 years, three amazing kids
H had 17 month EA/PA
D-day 1/5/13
Reconcilling

Posts: 787 | Registered: Jan 2013
Elaine2012
Member
Member # 36099
Default  Posted: 8:37 AM, November 10th (Sunday)

Happy Birthday to you

Sending a birthday (((tara1110))) to you!!



Me- 53
WH- 57
Divorced - May 22, 2014
Dday - Blindsided July 2012
Married 35 years
4 adult DD's, 2 SIL, 3 grandchildren

Posts: 287 | Registered: Jul 2012
Topic Posts: 5