New Beginnings
User Topic: NB - F*cking suck ......
booger bear
Member # 26584
Default  Posted: 10:57 AM, November 10th (Sunday)

And I'm pissed I have to have one, or try to have one, or what the fuck ever.

I'm exhausted.

I am working the equivalent to 2 full time jobs. My LPN M-F which is over 10+hrs a day, and a part time stint at Pizza Hut, which is suppose to be 20-25 hrs. Well we all know in that type of industry it does not happen. Whatever, I knew what expect going in, so I'm not surprised.

Just strange how and when you notice your alone, and miss having someone to come home to.

[This message edited by booger bear at 10:58 AM, November 10th (Sunday)]

I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18810 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: OK - Hot as hell here !!!!!!
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:12 AM, November 10th (Sunday)


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana

Posts: 25712 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 34477
Default  Posted: 11:54 AM, November 10th (Sunday)

(((Booger bear)))

Me: BW (35)
Him: ExWH (31) EA/PA with MOW coworker
Married 9 years, 2 small kids
dday 3/12/2011 divorced fall 2012

My ipad does a lot of crazy typos.

Posts: 651 | Registered: Jan 2012
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 11:57 AM, November 10th (Sunday)

aw sweetie, I'm sorry life is sucking so much right now. I know it's hard to see it while you're in the middle of it, but really, you are so strong. You're doing what needs to be done, even though it sucks. You are rebuilding your life, and you're doing a great job. It's just taking more fucking time than it was supposed to.

I get it. I'm not where I thought I'd be financially at this point either. And it does suck. But I will get there. And so will you. Because you rock, bb. You are so much stronger than you believe. Look back and see how far you have come. What you have overcome, and what you have accomplished. Be proud of that. You may not be where you thought you'd be by now, but you truly have come so far.

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect

Posts: 12164 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 12:21 PM, November 10th (Sunday)

(((booger bear)))

[This message edited by FaithFool at 12:21 PM, November 10th (Sunday)]

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17488 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 37063
Default  Posted: 1:04 PM, November 10th (Sunday)


It is not easy, that's for sure. Hang in there! You're one awesome humanbeing for doing so much. I totally acknowledge your feelings of it sucking though. I hope you get a break soon.!

Me BxW, him SA NPD WxH
1 wonderful toddler - sole legal custody to me and supervised visitation to xwh.
DDay 01/2012
10/2013 Finally Divorced!!

Posts: 266 | Registered: Oct 2012
booger bear
Member # 26584
Wink  Posted: 1:05 PM, November 10th (Sunday)

Thank you all. I appreciate the hugs and support.

I'm just so tired of feeling like I'm going up hill for nothing. Getting my $$$ life in order seems so small and insignificant compared to my heart.

I know how that sounds, I never thought of myself as the type of girl that her needed her worth noticed and acknowledged by a man. But may be I am. It sure would be nice to come home after working all day and night to someone to love me.

Whatever. I'm just pissed and just pissed ...... Just all feels for nothing. Who cares when I'm gone if I was $$$ ok in my life ???

blah ... I'm gonna go walk and blast some inappropriate tunes, make people wonder about the girl in the pink sweatshirt. Fuck em.

[This message edited by booger bear at 1:06 PM, November 10th (Sunday)]

I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18810 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: OK - Hot as hell here !!!!!!
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 1:29 PM, November 10th (Sunday)


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 1:46 PM, November 10th (Sunday)

(((Booger bear)))

Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17801 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Member # 23328
Default  Posted: 3:15 PM, November 10th (Sunday)


This won't last forever. Rough patches end. You'll be able to make changes down the line, just not as quickly as you'd like.

I hope you have people you can talk to, like good friends or a counselor.

Take care of yourself. There's a great future out there. It won't come to you; you have to go to it.

Posts: 5181 | Registered: Mar 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, November 11th (Monday)

I'm right there with you sweetie. If someone had told me 4 years ago....I would be a single mom of a 15 month old and renting a duplex, living alone and single for a year and a half.....I would have thought they were crazy! And, I am! Life is not what I thought it would be at this point. I struggle CONSTANTLY with money and am always worried about bills. Life does kinda suck right now....but I'm trying to make the most of it! Hang in there sweetie! You are doing great! And, you kinda get used to the loneliness....its not easy....but it gets easier to cope with. ((BIGHUGZ))

"Sometimes your knight in shining armor just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12

Posts: 2724 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, November 11th (Monday)


Tired makes it all seem so much work. You've come so far since you first joined. I know you'll get through this. I always want someone around more when I'm tired.

But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler

Posts: 8459 | Registered: Apr 2008
want a new life
Member # 27286
Default  Posted: 3:04 PM, November 11th (Monday)

I just wanted you to know you've been heard and you're not alone. I'm there with you except I have the opposite problem that my hours have been cut at my job and in my area there are few part-time jobs. So I end up with no money and too much alone time. Sucks the big one!!

My life used to be "not enough hours in the day" to now " too much freakin" time on my han ds".

(((booger bear)))

Me BS - 57
D 6/2010
It's been a long journey but I think I'm finally arriving at my happy place:)

Posts: 232 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: midwest
booger bear
Member # 26584
Default  Posted: 9:47 PM, November 11th (Monday)

Ya knoww we need to write a how to manual on NB's ... There are how to's on everything else ...

Or NB's for Dummies book ... We would make a fortune and SI could go on forever off the money. I don't want a sappy book full of heart felt quotes and such, real life NB's stuff. Like, this morning in my self induced funk, instead of my body spray I used my hairspray, needless to say my bra did not move at all today. Real life shit like that, how to not be in such a funk that you can read.

IDK ... It was a better day.

I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18810 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: OK - Hot as hell here !!!!!!
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 10:18 PM, November 12th (Tuesday)

(((Booger Bear)))

Posts: 35825 | Registered: Mar 2011
Member # 21529
Default  Posted: 5:28 PM, November 13th (Wednesday)

((Booger Bear))

DD 18
DDay Marchish 2006
Let it go........

Posts: 215 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: land of oz
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 6:25 PM, November 13th (Wednesday)


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52

Posts: 3207 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Member # 4956
Default  Posted: 9:03 PM, November 13th (Wednesday)


BS/60s WS/60s Divorcing and not soon enough~!
Its nice to be important, but its more important to be nice...

DD 6-14

Posts: 3099 | Registered: Jul 2004 | From: somewhere over the rainbow
Topic Posts: 18