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User Topic: More flavors of pain than coffee
Threnody
Member
Member # 1558
Default  Posted: 9:37 AM, November 14th (Thursday)

A book quote which resonated with me. I've long believed what he has written, but I have never been able to articulate it so well, or so beautifully.

And at some point you realize that there are more flavors of pain than coffee. There's the little empty pain of leaving something behind ‒ graduating, taking the next step forward, walking out of something familiar and safe into the unknown. There's the big, whirling pain of life upending all of your plans and expectations. There's the sharp little pains of failure, and the more obscure aches of successes that didn't give you what you thought they would. There are the vicious, stabbing pains of hopes being torn up. The sweet little pains of finding others, giving them your love, and taking joy in their life as they grow and learn. There's the steady pain of empathy that you shrug off so you can stand beside a wounded friend and help them bear their burdens.

And if you are very, very lucky, there are a few blazing hot little pains you feel when you realize that you are standing in a moment of utter perfection, an instant of triumph, or happiness, or mirth which at the same time cannot possibly last ‒ and yet will remain with you for life.

Everyone is down on pain, because they forget something important about it: Pain is for the living. Only the dead don't feel it.

Pain is a part of life. Sometimes it's a big part, and sometimes it isn't, but either way, it's a part of the big puzzle, the deep music, the great game. Pain does two things: It teaches you, tells you that you're alive. Then it passes away and leaves you changed. It leaves you wiser, sometimes. Sometimes it leaves you stronger. Either way, pain leaves its mark, and everything important that will ever happen to you in life is going to involve it in one degree or another.

Jim Butcher, White Night


“If you don't like my opinion of you, you can always improve.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
"Great love requires determination." ~ tryingtwo
"Don't try to win over the haters, you're not the jackass whisperer." ~ Brene Brown

Posts: 14040 | Registered: Jun 2003 | From: Middle-of-Diddly, TX
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 9:44 AM, November 14th (Thursday)

That really does sum it up.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51821 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
luvbug0915
Member
Member # 22934
Default  Posted: 11:15 AM, November 14th (Thursday)

Thank you for sharing, I really needed this today.


"I haven't stopped looking for the good in people. I've just accepted the fact that I'm not always going to find it."-Patti LaBelle


Posts: 1038 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Metro Atlanta
better4me
Member
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 11:58 AM, November 14th (Thursday)

very good. Thanks for sharing!


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52
Divorced

Posts: 3063 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 12:01 PM, November 14th (Thursday)

Beautifully put. Thank you, Thren.


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 24767 | Registered: Aug 2011
She11ybeanz
Member
Member # 27457
Default  Posted: 12:06 PM, November 14th (Thursday)

WOW...that's so true! I love it!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor ...is just a douchebag in tin foil!!"

ME - BW - 35
HIM - XWH - 39
D day: November 15th, 2009
Married: 5 Years, together 8
Divorced: December 13th, 2010
New Beginning: Piper/8-3-12


Posts: 2713 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Virginia
BrokenDaisy
Member
Member # 37063
Default  Posted: 1:50 PM, November 14th (Thursday)

So very well said


Me BxW, him SA NPD WxH
1 wonderful toddler - sole legal custody to me and supervised visitation to xwh.
DDay 01/2012
10/2013 Divorced!!

Posts: 242 | Registered: Oct 2012
cmego
Member
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 6:05 PM, November 14th (Thursday)

It reminds me of what was said at my father's funeral. Today would have been his birthday,

"The price we pay for love, is grief."

Pain is a part of life.


me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17
Divorced

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings


Posts: 4100 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Virginia
inconnu
Member
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 7:33 PM, November 14th (Thursday)

thank you so much for posting this, thren. it really does sum it up, and I definitely needed the reminder.


Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect


Posts: 12144 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
Topic Posts: 9