New Beginnings
User Topic: Antiversary pity party for one
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 8:10 PM, November 17th (Sunday)

Antiversary of DDay is today. Bothers me more than it did last year, maybe because it is Sunday and I was less distracted today than if I had been at work. Church often makes me sad too so that may have been an extra dose of the "lonelies" today. Went with my father to a College Men's basketball game this afternoon and the game and the win were exciting, but now I'm home again, and ugh. I'm just sad. Thought I'd be "further" along than this somehow, whatever that means, so using this day as a measuring stick sucks. And this feeling sucks.

And tomorrow will be better, things are always better in the daylight. And tomorrow the 3rd antiversary will be in the past . And even knowing this still, I'm just feeling really . Going to bed early makes sense. Some days I just want to shout FML, you know??

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52

Posts: 3209 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 8:44 PM, November 17th (Sunday)

(((b4me))) tomorrow will be better. this day will be over, you'll have made it through it.

you are further than it feels like. right now you have echoes of the past washing over you, but that's all they are, echoes.

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect

Posts: 12166 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: DeepInTheHeartOf, TX
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 9:19 PM, November 17th (Sunday)

I'm right behind you - January 11th is my 3rd anti-V of DDay - but it does seem to get a bit easier each year - not EASY, but easier.

((Hugs)) Thinking of you today b4m - and just be proud of you - you made it through it and you're living a better life every day.

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4609 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 10:08 PM, November 17th (Sunday)

Year 3 was tough. Year 5 is better. You will get there.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17530 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 11:53 AM, November 18th (Monday)

Thank you for your support. It helped. Before I went to bed I signed and "glitterized" some SI Christmas card exchange cards. It is hard to be grumpy when you are signing cards and writing notes of appreciation and holiday greetings. Good therapy. It is sunny today, and my mood has lightened. Maybe rather than looking at Nov. 17th as the ending of something, I can practice looking at November 18 as the start of the next year of my NB, kind of like my birthday, my "re-birth day"??

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52

Posts: 3209 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 12:49 PM, November 18th (Monday)


me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings

Posts: 4186 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 12:51 PM, November 18th (Monday)

Thanks for the reminder to keep working on my cards!

Big hugs to you.


Cherish those who seek the truth but beware of those who find it. - François-Marie Arouet

Posts: 17846 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 7