User Topic: Baby announcement
New Member
Member # 40892
Default  Posted: 3:30 AM, December 8th (Sunday)

I have not posted yet, just do a lot of reading. My husband and I are reconciling and doing really well. He had a ONS/ a month EA with a women from work. They no longer work together and we are doing great but a huge part of me cant help but want to send her a new baby announcement as I am pregnant with our second. I realize it is childish and petty but just thinking about it brings me a little bit of joy. Not as much as slashing her tires would have but that oppritunity is gone lol.
So I guess I'm just asking good idea or bad? Also they have had no contact since DD and I have full access to everything and have blocked her so her contacting him shouldn't be an issue. Thank you for listening. I know I think it's a fabulous idea but want to know what someone with experience and an outsiders perspective thinks?

Posts: 1 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: California
Member # 10347
Default  Posted: 3:47 AM, December 8th (Sunday)

I would most certainly NOT send her a new baby announcement. I happen to live in a small town area, and I would surely have something like that announced in the local newspaper though. You might have some less obvious avenues to make sure she gets the memo about your baby.

Also, put your happy news on Facebook if you have an account. Do you have mutual friends with the whore? If you do, the word will likely get back to her. As for me, I would not block her from FB. I'd unblock, but never post anything there that you would NOT want her to know.

Posts: 5742 | Registered: Apr 2006
Member # 38914
Default  Posted: 3:55 AM, December 8th (Sunday)

I agree with Bobbi-Sue. Telling her would make her feel important and you shall have broken NC. Don't do it. Let the word pass around through someone else. It would hurt her the most that way.

D-day:2/24/13 (I was 10 weeks pregnant at the time and DS was 15 months)
Status: Parted ways!

"If only I can fight just a little longer, I know it's gonna make me stronger" Jamie Grace-Holding on.

Posts: 347 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Ohio
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 2:14 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

How are you able to get in contact with her if they don't work together anymore?

I'm with the other posts, though. No contact is always the best policy. Even if you get some kind of satisfaction from the thought of her discomfort... you are inviting her into your baby's live, however inadvertently.

Don't give her any more energy. Spend it on yourself and your little ones.

I bow to those who keep their hearts open when it is most difficult, those who refuse to keep their armor on any longer than they have to, those who recognize the courage at the heart of vulnerability. - Jeff Brown

Posts: 17367 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:51 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

AS much fun as it is to fantasize about such things, it wouldn't do anything but encourage her to reach back out to H. Don't give her the power. She will find out some way that you two are happy and getting to healthy and reproducing, and that will get her.


Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8530 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 9:07 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

No contact.

She'll find out one way or another, and none of those ways should come from you, or your WH.

Congratulations on your new baby!!!

Posts: 3387 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 9:10 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

Oh no no no. She'll find out eventually on her own. If it comes from you, she'll know that she bothers you. It's hard advice to follow, but act like she does not exist.

We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6741 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 9:11 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

Oh yes and congratulations!

We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6741 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
Member # 33374
Default  Posted: 9:11 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

Personally there was/is no way in HELL I would EVER give the OW ANY information about my daughter. None, nada, nothing! I don't want her to know ANYTHING about my family anymore. I don't want her to have any windows into my world.

You are not dealing with rational people or situations. Normal thought processes won't work...story of my life.

Me- BW, 28
Him- fWh, 34
Mostly R'd, minus a few scars...bought a house and got a puppy...And baby makes 3! She arrived August

Posts: 2021 | Registered: Sep 2011
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 10:44 AM, December 11th (Wednesday)

NO,NO,NO...Do not send anything to the OW. She does not deserve a look into your marriage or family. Even if it bothers her for a second, it will only allow her a look into your life again. I know here while back, I thought about calling the OW and telling her she lost and didn't she feel like a total idiot for being used for 3yrs and that my WH#2 never planned on leaving me for her, even though she got an engagement ring from him to shut her up. I had to talk myself down off the ledge because it would have just started the broken NC back up again. Talk yourself off the ledge. She is not worth your headspace. Concentrate on fixing your marriage and family now. Enjoy your pregancy and congratulations!!! (((HUGS)))

M-9 yrs T-11 yrs
4 children-none together
DD#1-9/5/11 LTA 2yrs
DD#2-7/3/12 False R
DD#3-4/29/13 (OW broke NC)
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 2420 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
Topic Posts: 10