User Topic: Inadverdently saw a sonogram pic of homewrecker whore's fetus
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 3:14 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Homewrecker whore tagged my STBX on facebook. It showed a photo of him from when he was about 20 years old. I clicked on her name in FB and see that she uploaded a pink image saying "Our baby girl is coming" and went to some Tweets. I clicked on old tweets and it showed the sonogram. One of the tweets said, "enjoying breakfast on lazy Sunday with (STBX)." Other than close friends, most acquaintances don't even know that we are separated and this is the way the news is going to get out.

Sometimes, I can't believe this is happening to me. I wonder to my counselor that I didn't know he hated me this much. She replied maybe he's only thinking of himself.

Posts: 198 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 3:48 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Ouch. I cannot adequately express how sorry I am for you. This shit sandwhich they give us really sucks.
He is a complete dirtbag for allowing that post to go out. Sheesh, you two aren't even D. I hope the kid turns out to be the demon child of Satan and keeps them both up for nights and days on end with screaming, crapping, and throwing up!
ETA: You seriuosly need to block both her and him. It only causes more pain. Honestly, you have to feel sorry for any child that comes into the world with two selfish asswholes for parents.

[This message edited by StillLivin at 5:25 PM, December 16th (Monday)]

I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2335 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Member # 40343
Default  Posted: 4:00 PM, December 16th (Monday)

I know exactly how you feel. My STBX and his whore's baby girl is due in ten days. He still denies ever having cheated on me and says that she is engaged and they just talk sports. Ya ok! Too bad when you goggle their names together their bump registry pops up with both of their names and the due date. They are also registered at BabysRUs and BuyBuyBaby. Of course, he says that must have been a mistake. I have been living the lie for years so the affair itself doesn't bother me anymore, other that the whore being around my children (which he denies), but I say their maternity pic on FB and its soooo beautiful! It did make me cry seeing how in love they look. Of course it's all fake, well I'm sure she loves him, but he cheats on she and I with women that he meets on Match and god knows where else. I used to blame myself and think that I wasn't a hot or interesting enough wife for my husband to sway and not love me like he should. But you know what, I'm awesome and people enjoy my company. Yes I could be in better shape and have bigger tatas, but I'm a good person dammit! And yes, even douche bag tries to get me to take him back and tells me daily how much he loves me, YUCK!!! ..........I am not as strong as that sounds. I am still very depressed, and we aren't even D yet. I filed August 30th. I just want it to be over and done with and for my five year old daughter and eleven month old son not to have to go through all of this shit.

Posts: 74 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: CA
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:12 PM, December 16th (Monday)

I'm sorry, lavender. I'm sure that was difficult to see.

Gently, honey? Please read the quote in my tagline. You "indavertently" saw the sonogram because you looked at FB. And then followed to Twitter. And then looked at old tweets...

Please stop looking. Please? You are asking for more pain with every click. Block them. Block it all. ((((lavender))))

You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana

Posts: 25765 | Registered: Aug 2011
solus sto
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 4:40 PM, December 16th (Monday)

With all due respect, following links to twitter isn't inadvertent. Really, checking your stbx's FB is not inadvertent. You're watching them---and saw something that hurt.

For that, I am sorry.

But it was 100% preventable--and 0% inadvertent.

Block him, and you will never see things like this again.

BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 53, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 8848 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
Member # 36307
Default  Posted: 5:26 PM, December 16th (Monday)


Just beyond words........

Maybe you should block FB access temporarily . That may be your best defense during the holiday season.

Hugs to you...

BS: Me (63yo)
FWH: HIM (65yo) serial infidelities over past 35 years
OW: Many, most recent 1/2 his age
DD: Multiple unconfirmed until 2012 when I presented evidence, plus LTA with his friends wife lasting 10 years. TT over past year
So done,

Posts: 618 | Registered: Jul 2012
Member # 5929
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Really you should just save yourself the heartache and block them both on all forms of social media.

Keep calm and carry on.

Posts: 49482 | Registered: Nov 2004 | From: Minneapolis
Member # 18442
Default  Posted: 6:08 PM, December 16th (Monday)

i think this woman probably needs to see more to let the fog clear. I know I had to have proof for yrs till it sunk in that my ex was the way he was. OR I would have gone back yet again.

although I do agree after a bit, she needs to walk away but I understand why she looked. that WAS her husband whom she loved dearly.

6/07 EX had several Emotional/sexual A
FALSE Reconciles. cheats again. D 5/09
2013- 10 month marriage &D to friend. he was a lyin, freeloadn biploar mess.
NOW? Living my life and loving it.

Posts: 691 | Registered: Mar 2008
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 6:32 PM, December 16th (Monday)

You "indavertently" saw the sonogram because you looked at FB. And then followed to Twitter.

I don't use Twitter and not familiar with it, so I was just expecting to see text, not an image.

Posts: 198 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 6:33 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Really, checking your stbx's FB is not inadvertent.

Homewrecker whore tagged stbx and it popped up on my FB page. I didn't go to STBX's FB page.

Posts: 198 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
Member # 36060
Default  Posted: 6:45 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Still though, if stbx was not a fb friend of yours, his tags would not show up on your feed. Block him, and this doesn't happen again. It's really not worth it. XH and I do not generally argue or have a contentious relationship, but he has long since been blocked on fb. I figured the pictures of the two of them, the "in a relationship" status change would be coming quickly and I really don't need to see that. There are plenty of other ways to communicate when I have to.

BS-Me 30s
WS-Him 30s
D-Day 4/2012 (Insisted EA only)
D-Day 5/2012 (Did I say EA? Ummm..)
Numerous other TT/broken NC d-days until S 1/2013. D settled 11/2013
MOW-coworker, 40s.
2 DS and DD all w/autism

Posts: 739 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: USA
Member # 30910
Default  Posted: 6:57 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Here is why to block them both: about 4 months ago OW popped up on my people you may know feed. She was holding a baby. She and XH are no longer together (or so I am told). I thought, "Wow, that was fast," as I began clicking. Apparently, when I got to her page, I inadvertently friend requested her. She called XH and asked what the deal was. Humiliating!!! XH had been blocked for quite a while, but OW and I apparently have some "friends" in common.

LIke any good techie, I love the availability of the cyber stalk, but I am telling you, from experience, no information gain is worth this kind of thing happening to you.

And...likely your counselor is right, he is thinking of himself. Further, OW, who is pregnant by a known cheater and woman abuser, is effectively announcing to society at large that her child was created during an affair. OW is effectively outing STBXWH as a cheater. What morons.

Open a new tab and block them. It is like jumping off the high dive. Once you do it, you sort of wonder why it took you so long.

Posts: 917 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: USA
Member # 39193
Default  Posted: 7:04 PM, December 16th (Monday)


I'm so sorry. I know how much that hurts, not the baby part because my XWH is "fixed", but getting blindsided with something you didn't expect, yet again.

I don't use Twitter and not familiar with it, so I was just expecting to see text, not an image.

A similar thing happened to me when I went to XWH's LinkedIn page. I don't know why I was driven to look, it was just one of those stupid urges. I knew he kept a profile pic on it and thought there might be a new one... but I was NOT expecting a cozy couple pic of him with OW. Like you I was prepared for one thing, and got slammed with something unexpected and far more hurtful.

That was the day I finally realized what "NC" really means. And looking at pages, following threads, any of that is breaking NC. The fact that it's one-sided and your ex doesn't know its happening is irrelevant. Any time you open the door between his life and yours, you are also opening yourself up to be hurt again.

NC = no new hurts!

Please protect yourself from this unnecessary pain. Block, block, block. At the very least, unfriend. I have XWH, OW, and OW's daughter all blocked. Not so much to prevent them from looking at me, but to prevent ME from looking at THEM.

As far as the news getting out this way.... He's making himself look like an ass. He's letting OW make him look like an ass. Their actions do not reflect on you, so please don't worry about that. Anyone worth caring about in your life is going to see this crap for what it is. They will think less of HIM, not of you.

You deserve so much better than this.


Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. ~ Anais Nin

Posts: 919 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Oregon
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 7:19 PM, December 16th (Monday)

STBX and I have a school-aged child together. Since home wrecker whore posts photos on the internet, it occurred to me recently that I don't want home wrecker whore posting pics of my child and tagging her online. From this point, I feel like I need to keep "friended" to fucking asshole to monitor it.

Posts: 198 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
Member # 21239
Default  Posted: 11:46 PM, December 16th (Monday)

Hugs and strength , I can't imagine....

Divorced 10/2013

Posts: 548 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: West Coast
Member # 16958
Default  Posted: 1:28 AM, December 17th (Tuesday)

Even if you stay friends to monitor at some point you will have ti stop clicking on links and postings that clearly have nothing to do with your child. You will keep ripping off the scab and bleeding

Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!

Posts: 942 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Northern California
Topic Posts: 16