She is detaching. This may be where she needs to be for now. Is she getting help?
Are you checking in with her when you are away? Can she reasonably confirm that you are where you are supposed to be? And with whom?
After five months she is only beginning to process this reality.
But you say this.
I only wanted to get closer to her. I would try and anything that seemed to push me away was a trigger
That tells me you are REALLY only beginning your recover. Sobriety ISN'T recovery. You are, in this statement, assigning, even in a small way, some blame to her for your acting out.
This is a LONG process. For both of you. "One day at a time" is a off repeated slogan because it's TRUE.
It works when you work it.