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Just Found Out
User Topic: still can't function
aero1122
Member
Member # 41575
Default  Posted: 5:28 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

Christmas was rough. Pretending all day long while the kids opened gifts and having dinner with his family sucked. I barely ate and just said I wasn't feeling well... this fog will not go away. He is remorseful and being very open with me. Apologizing and saying how much he loves me and sorry he hurt me. He starts counseling after the new year but I just can't function. Down 20lbs since d day. This is horrible


Me-35
WH-36
Together 18 years
Married 7 years
2 kids
D-day 12-7-13
Both currently in counseling
Trying to R

I am a warrior!
I will survive and thrive!


Posts: 101 | Registered: Dec 2013
cl131716
Member
Member # 40699
Default  Posted: 6:51 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

(((areo1122)))


Me BS 31
Him WS 34 Trying4change
Together 3 years, married for one
D-day: 07/23/13 cybersex with COW
D-day: 12/27/13 found out he met and kissed a "friend" in 2011
"A clear and innocent conscience fears nothing."

Posts: 935 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Oklahoma
homewrecked2011
Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 7:17 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

I stayed in the bathtub most of that first month -- 2 years ago for me.....

I had to get counseling outpatient at a treatment center....There were several women in my group for the same reason-- cheating spouses upheaving our lives.

Just because he is willing to get help, doesn't repair the damage like the snap of fingers.

Heal at your own pace, process all this at your own pace, do not hide your pain from him,,, he has to see what he has done to you.

Get counseling for your self,,, it helps so much....I also got free counseling at the domestic violence center because emotionally abusing (cheating) is domestic violence.

((((aero))))


me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 2111 | Registered: Jan 2012
Gotmegood
Member
Member # 41407
Default  Posted: 7:21 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

Oh aero, I feel you. Your pain is palpable. If they only thought for a moment before acting like selfish d'bags. If they considered the consequences at all, some of us could have been spared this incredible pain. While it won't help make it go away, I feel that since you are at least being tended to, you have a decent shot at reconciling if that's what you chose to do. May these first horrible days pass quickly. Take care of yourself too. Stay hydrated and eat whatever you can get down. Also, take a walk and get some fresh air. Keep posting sweetie, we are here for you.


Me: faithful wife 62.
Him: WH 64 , prostitute 20 yr old
DDay: 8-13-2013
Status: boinging up and down like a yo-yo

Posts: 462 | Registered: Nov 2013 | From: Florida
kra127
Member
Member # 41045
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

I'm a couple months out and I still have days that I have difficulty doing the little things. Christmas was hard because my WS was here ALL DAY with the kids. Counseling has been very helpful and I feel so empowered when I leave the office. Do you have a good friend who you can vent to?
I'm sorry you're here.


Me 40
WS 39
2 young kids, Married 10 yrs
OW 22, admitted to EA and then TT to PA two weeks later. Also, found out about several "friends".
Dday 10/8/13
Divorcing

Posts: 91 | Registered: Oct 2013
nekorb
Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 8:46 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

(((Aero1122)))

I'm so sorry. are you getting counseling for yourself? I hope good things come to you in the new year. Sending you cyber cocoa and cookies.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
aero1122
Member
Member # 41575
Default  Posted: 8:49 PM, December 26th (Thursday)

Thank you all. I am starting counseling after the first of the year also. I am so thankful that I found this website and am able to vent here.


Me-35
WH-36
Together 18 years
Married 7 years
2 kids
D-day 12-7-13
Both currently in counseling
Trying to R

I am a warrior!
I will survive and thrive!


Posts: 101 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 7