SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Off Topic
User Topic: Another angel baby
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Sad  Posted: 9:32 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

If you could whisper a prayer for my sister I would appreciate it.

She's in the process of losing her third baby in a year.

Life is so unfair.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 9:35 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

Keeping your sister in prayer.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 51940 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
betrayedfriend
Member
Member # 19785
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

I am so sorry, your sister is in my prayers. Has she considered testing to see why this is happening? I've lost 4 babies and while testing didn't lead to any concrete answers, it revealed some possibilities. Please let your sister know that it's ok to grieve and breathe, this child is a very real part of her.


I originally joined SI as a way to help my best friends find ways of coping with infidelity, but now infidelity has touched my family much closer to home.

Posts: 865 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Midwest USA
Gottagetthrough
Member
Member # 27325
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

Please let your sister know that it's ok to grieve and breathe, this child is a very real part of her.

so true.

Praying for your sister. I am so very sorry.


Posts: 1368 | Registered: Jan 2010
cass
Member
Member # 24261
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

((((Aubrie's sister and angel baby))))


DDay - April 2008
Me - 54 and doing great. Found myself again and loving life
Him - who??

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone (Johnny Nash)

Those who stir the shit soup get to lick the spoon!


Posts: 4965 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: UK
Williesmom
Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm sorry.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7563 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 9:53 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm so sorry.....


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 7942 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 10:17 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm so angry.

Why her? Why did she have to inherit the fertility issues? Times like this I feel incredible guilt over the fact QS can just look at me and I get pregnant. That I didn't have complications carrying my babies. That we're "done" and he's been snipped. Guilt because I've always been held over her head. She feels she'll never be "as good" as me. (Thank you FOO)

And Mother, because of her lousy choices, is not a part of this process. My sister doesn't feel exactly safe or stable enough to call and "chat" with her about it all. So it's just me and my sister, working thru this together.

Oh Little Sister, my heart bleeds for you.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Crescita
Member
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 10:24 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

So sorry

Posts: 3344 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:30 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((((sister, husband, and angel baby)))))

I'm so sorry, Aubrie.


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams


Posts: 25052 | Registered: Aug 2011
ajsmom
Member
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

So very sad.

(((Aubrie & Sis)))

Sending prayers.


AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21041 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
gahurts
Member
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 10:37 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm very sorry for your sister's loss Aubrie. I will keep her in my prayers.

I know what you mean. I had 5 kids without any trouble whatsoever but my one brother had to use IVF to get his beautiful daughters and my other brother's wife couldn't even get pregnant with IVF - 3 failed pregnancies. It just doesn't make sense and is not fair at all.


"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie


Posts: 3406 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
jo2love
Moderator
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 11:56 AM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie, Aubrie's sister, and family)))

I am so sorry. Sending hugs and prayers.


Posts: 34726 | Registered: Mar 2011
itainteasy
Member
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 12:25 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Prayers sent...I'm so sorry for your sister, Aubrie.

Posts: 3355 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
Chrysalis123
Member
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

I am so sorry. Prayers being said.


Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. 

Posts: 2651 | Registered: Jan 2010
tryingagain74
Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Sending strength and positive thoughts to you both during this difficult time.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3575 | Registered: Oct 2011
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 1:42 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Thank you everyone.

We're in the waiting stage. She's passing fluid but that's the extent of it. She can't get in with her doctor till Tuesday.

*sigh*


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
booger bear
Member
Member # 26584
Default  Posted: 1:48 PM, January 3rd (Friday)


I am fiercely independent and I won’t apologize for it. I'd rather be single than settled.

Posts: 18751 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: OK - Hot as hell here !!!!!!
stroppy_wanadoo
Member
Member # 11224
Default  Posted: 2:15 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Prayers for your sister and for you, Aubrie.

Posts: 1020 | Registered: Jul 2006
Teach8
Member
Member # 36521
Default  Posted: 2:21 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie's sister and family))). Sending strength and prayers. I'm so very sorry. I do know the pain she is feeling.


Me: BW. Him: WH. Dday: 4/26/12. TT until 8/15/12 LTA 7 years. Trying to R

Posts: 502 | Registered: Aug 2012
sisoon
Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 2:37 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie & sister)))


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 9991 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
jrc1963
Member
Member # 26531
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Prayers being sent...

I went thru nine years of infertility before conceiving and carrying my precious, wonderful son.

I never suffered a loss... but the endless trying and injections and drs and everything felt almost impossible at times.

Finally, God gave me my wonderful son when I least expected it.

Holding you and your dear sister in prayer.


Me: BSO - 46
Him: FWSO - 69
DS - 13
D-Day - 12-11-09,
R - he finally came home
Your life is an Occasion. Rise to it. - Mr. Magorium, "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

Posts: 24451 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Florida
purplejacket4
Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 3:03 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Please see that your sister gets tested for autoimmune diseases. Most miscarriages are the result of chromosomal abnormalities but so many in a row is usually indicative of other things.


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2153 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 3:58 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

She's still holding on to hope. Can't say I blame her. I would too. To her, it's not final till it's final.

When she's ready, we'll talk about the possibility of autoimmune and testing.

Thank you again everyone.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
thebighurt
Member
Member # 34722
Default  Posted: 5:32 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Holding on to hope for her, too. So many people don't discuss, acknowledge, or get to grieve such losses. So sad.

Like you, I got pregnant so easily, (even on BC) and had a problem-free time, for the most part. I almost feel guilty talking to people who haven't had that experience.

((((Hugs))))


Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

Posts: 2280 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: the Other Side
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 5:44 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

I guess I should have been clearer. She's holding onto hope that this baby isn't lost yet.

She went to the ER last night cause she was having crazy bad abdominal pains. They did blood tests and ultrasounds. Her HCG was 0 but there was alot of "something" in her uterus. The doctor wasn't sure what it was. He said she was either fixing to have a period from hell or miscarry. Given her history, he was leaning towards miscarriage. That's what he put on the official paperwork. "Missed miscarriage".


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Mama_of_3_Kids
Member
Member # 26651
Default  Posted: 7:14 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie & Family)))


Me: FBW/30 Him: FWH/33 The kidlets: DS13, DS10, and DD8 The hounds: Four Shih Tzu's
Finally, completely R'd
Clothed in strength and dignity, with nothing to fear, she smiles when she thinks about the future.~Proverbs 31:25

Posts: 11555 | Registered: Dec 2009
purplejacket4
Member
Member # 34262
Default  Posted: 7:40 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Did she think she might be pregnant or already know? The reason I ask is that it can take weeks for the BHCG to go back to normal (Zero) so that would generally indicate either she was never pregnant this time or had a missed miscarriage several weeks ago.


Me: BS 45
Her: fWS 48 (same sex partner)
Together: 18 years now (both MDs)
OW: meh so what 40s PhD
DD1: 10/30/11EA; DD2: 11/10/11 Had ONS; TT until 12/26/11; broke NC 6/12; NC again 7/12; R-ish

Posts: 2153 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: Great Southwest
caregiver9000
Member
Member # 28622
Default  Posted: 7:47 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie)))

I have no experience with this, yet I am crying. It is your pain reading through the words for your sister. The ability to hurt FOR others is a beautiful thing.

Whispered prayers for all tonight.


Me: 44, independent, happy, despite co-parenting with a lower muppet
FT "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
DS 13 DS 10
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

Posts: 5776 | Registered: May 2010 | From: a better place
Aubrie
Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 8:05 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Did she think she might be pregnant or already know?
While she didn't get a positive test, literally every symptom was there. Missed period, extremely sore breasts, breast enlargement, frequent urination, cravings, mood swings, hot flashes, the list goes on. We've suspected it for about two months. For some reason, OTC pregnancy tests don't work on her. The only times she's gotten a "Yep, you'r pregnant" is when she went in for bloodwork. Sadly, with the ones she's lost, the levels were crazy low, or non-existent.

We had her scheduled for a doctors appointment but with the holidays, we couldn't get anything till next week. Now, it seems she'll be going in for different reasons.

It is your pain reading through the words for your sister. The ability to hurt FOR others is a beautiful thing.
I've experienced what she's going thru once myself. It was agony. The thought of her going thru it four times shreds my soul. Nobody should have to deal with that once, let alone four times.

[This message edited by Aubrie at 8:05 PM, January 3rd (Friday)]


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6167 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Exit Wounds
Member
Member # 32811
Default  Posted: 9:15 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm soo sooo sorry! Prayers sent

Posts: 2483 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: With my dad...and my dog...
solus sto
Member
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

(((Aubrie))) Prayers for your sister, her babe, and all who love them.


BS-me, 52
WH (Trac-fone), 52, PD
2 kids-DD25, DS18
multiple d-days
DIVORCING
Alone, most strangely, I live on~Rupert Brooke

Posts: 8577 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
JustDone
Member
Member # 9742
Default  Posted: 9:44 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm so sorry.

Sending this out to your sister:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2uC_ODp-Dc

Fly

Fly, fly little wing
Fly beyond imagining
The softest cloud, the whitest dove
Upon the wind of heaven's love
Past the planets and the stars
Leave this lonely world of ours
Escape the sorrow and the pain
And fly again

Fly, fly precious one
Your endless journey has begun
Take your gentle happiness
Far too beautiful for this
Cross over to the other shore
There is peace forevermore
But hold this mem'ry bittersweet
Until we meet

Fly, fly do not fear
Don't waste a breath, don't shed a tear
Your heart is pure, your soul is free
Be on your way, don't wait for me
Above the universe you'll climb
On beyond the hands of time
The moon will rise, the sun will set
But I won't forget

Fly, fly little wing
Fly where only angels sing
Fly away, the time is right
Go now, find the light


Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

Nobody forgets what happens, the secret is learning to live with it.


Posts: 2783 | Registered: Feb 2006
JustDone
Member
Member # 9742
Default  Posted: 9:44 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

double post

(((hugs)))

[This message edited by JustDone at 9:44 PM, January 3rd (Friday)]


Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

Nobody forgets what happens, the secret is learning to live with it.


Posts: 2783 | Registered: Feb 2006
sad12008
Member
Member # 18179
Default  Posted: 10:11 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

I'm sending positive thoughts for your sister, Aubrie! The moment you feel you're possibly pregnant, in your mind you're pushing that baby carriage down the street. It hurts like hell to have that taken away. I'm really sorry; I hope better times lie ahead for her. I'm glad she's got a big sis she can lean on. (((Aubrie's sis & Aubrie)))


"Everybody's life is hard. You look at life, and it's not a cakewalk. You've got to be able to bounce back." --Neil Young, father to two children with CP, another with epilepsy, and otherwise experientially qualified to comment

Posts: 3863 | Registered: Feb 2008 | From: a new start together
JanaGreen
Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 10:18 PM, January 3rd (Friday)

Oh no - I am so sorry. :(


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6671 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
peridot
Member
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 12:21 AM, January 4th (Saturday)

I'm sorry


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4752 | Registered: Feb 2008
sudra
Member
Member # 30143
Default  Posted: 7:09 PM, January 4th (Saturday)

So sorry. How heartbreaking for you all.


Me (BW) (54), Him(SAWH) (57)
Married 21 years, 1 son (19), 1 stepdaughter (27)
DDay #1 January 2004
DDay #2 7-27-2010 7 month EA/PA (became "engaged" to OW before he told me he wanted a divorce)
Working on R

Posts: 1457 | Registered: Nov 2010
Kajem
Member
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 9:07 AM, January 5th (Sunday)

Keeping your sis, baby and you in my prayers.

Hugs,
K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5017 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 39