Do you feel like you're looking at yourself and your actions differently?
Does your IC hold your feet to the fire when you get to uncomfortable subjects? Do they make you express and deal with the icky emotions?
Are they trying to let you off the hook/blame the marriage for your A?
Are you comfortable with them?
Are they helping you work toward a goal that you established early in therapy?
Are you getting what you need out of the sessions? Do you leave sessions feeling "lighter" or that you've accomplished something?
I suspect that if you're questioning whether your IC is working, it may not be. Me: WH
Her: BW, and the most amazing, beautiful person I've ever known
It is counterintuitive really... the less we defend our well-being, the more well we feel. ~ Nancy Colier