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User Topic: Why does he think this?
kra127
Member
Member # 41045
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, January 10th (Friday)

Many times in the last month or so WS has expressed that he is not a bad person and not a monster for causing all of this. I have never called him these things but I obviously have I pointed out several times the horrible things he's done in our marriage. Is this the guilt talking to him??

Also, WS claims that his IC told him he's not to blame for the affair and the stress it's caused. Now I'll take partial blame for some of the problems in our marriage but how is he not to blame for the affair? Seriously? If he's not to blame than who is? I'm so frustrated right now.


Me 40
WS 39
2 young kids, Married 10 yrs
OW 22, admitted to EA and then TT to PA two weeks later. Also, found out about several "friends".
Dday 10/8/13
Living separately until I can decide on R or D

Posts: 76 | Registered: Oct 2013
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:36 PM, January 10th (Friday)

Many times in the last month or so WS has expressed that he is not a bad person and not a monster for causing all of this.
Could be guilt. More likely he's trying to convince you (and probably himself) that he's not a bad guy.

WS claims that his IC told him he's not to blame for the affair and the stress it's caused.
1. I wouldn't believe the IC told him that unless the IC said it in front of you.
2. If the IC said that in front of you, you would be completely justified in losing your mind. Because it's bullshit.

(((((kra))))))


You can call me NIK

There's always failure. And there's always disappointment. And there's always loss.
But the secret is learning from the loss, and realizing that none of those holes are vacuums.
- Michael J. Fox


Posts: 22672 | Registered: Aug 2011
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 2:18 AM, January 11th (Saturday)

I agree with ^^^^^ if you didn't hear it from mc, it may be a lie. If mc did say this bogus bullshit, I would be shopping for another.


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..divorced slut who prefers committed men, specializing in befriending and bopping the fathers of her kids team mates
Status..%&$#@?$

Posts: 3985 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
steadfast1973
Member
Member # 24719
Default  Posted: 3:59 AM, January 11th (Saturday)

All of the above. Did you ask him who he thinks is to blame?


Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA (tt, uncovering much more) d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 (full confession)"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah

Posts: 1988 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 4