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User Topic: Do the images ever go away?
Mhiimg65
Member
Member # 41951
Default  Posted: 6:24 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

I sit here tonight, while WH is doing his weekly traveling and wonder if I'll ever stop seeing the images in my mind of him cheating while in certain cities. Although we are working on R, and he shows great remorse, I know I have to trust that he will continue to work on his own issues in my absence. But will the images that I conjure up ever go away and let me sleep at night? I can usually turn "bad" things off in my mind, but this movie just keeps going on and on like a bad nightmare. Any words of advise "Oh great brothers and sister of the club we never wanted to join" ? I'm only seventeen days into this and I just want to fast forward this movie to 5 years later. Even at the expense of being 5 years older:)


" He paved paradise and put up a parking lot"
BS - me
WS- him
married 26 years, together since kids
D- Day Jan 4 2014
PMA- starting this moment
R - in MC. WH is in IC

Posts: 142 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York
toomanyregrets
Member
Member # 37740
Default  Posted: 6:25 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

I still get "mind movies" and it's been over 20 years. Not as bad as at first but they still happen.


BH - 64
fWW - 60

"Affairs are not mistakes, they are a series of deliberate choices." - CrappyLife


Posts: 484 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Upstate NY
WarpSpeed
Member
Member # 32051
Default  Posted: 6:29 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/faq_bs.asp#FAQ34

#34 in the BS FAQ is about mind movies.

Sad that list gets to, and surpasses, 34 FAQs.

Hang in there and hope they fade sooner rather than later.


Me: BS (51)
Her: fWW (50)
Married 27 years
Two sons in college
Empty closet and note on bed Jan 2010, She filed for D Mar 2010, D final May 2010, Actually had D-Day and found out why it all happened July 2010. Remarried on 23rd Anniv Aug 2010

Posts: 1499 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Dallas
0115
Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 6:29 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

3 years out and I would describe them as faint. Not as brutal as at first...they'll always be there if you want to conjure them up. After a while you just won't want to.

(((Mhiimg65)))


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
Mhiimg65
Member
Member # 41951
Funny  Posted: 6:36 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

I was thinking about try a different "movie rental" something more Disney-like...like Mary Poppins or Sound of Music and then I realized they both fell in love with the "nannies" javascript:addSmily(''%20%20''

But at least they were widowed...Crap why couldn''t he have waited


" He paved paradise and put up a parking lot"
BS - me
WS- him
married 26 years, together since kids
D- Day Jan 4 2014
PMA- starting this moment
R - in MC. WH is in IC

Posts: 142 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York
Howie
Member
Member # 41922
Default  Posted: 6:41 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

See Howies "Flashbacks", below. 15 years out, I still have cruel flashbacks, the films you cite. I think there is a part of me that will never be reconciled to what she did; how could she?
That said,the events are rare.They don't poison our actual, reconciled, day to day happiness. I am sorry this happened to you; I am sorry it happened to me.But love is complex, if he reforms and is remorseful, you may yet have great contentment together.On this odd planet, your love together may still be the best possible. Don't despair. It gets better --IF he loves you. Best, etc.

Posts: 183 | Registered: Jan 2014
Mhiimg65
Member
Member # 41951
Default  Posted: 6:51 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

Wow Howie,
I guess we''re having the same kind of night. Well sweet dreams for both of us...You''re right, time to turn the movie off. It sucked anyway:)


" He paved paradise and put up a parking lot"
BS - me
WS- him
married 26 years, together since kids
D- Day Jan 4 2014
PMA- starting this moment
R - in MC. WH is in IC

Posts: 142 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York
Mhiimg65
Member
Member # 41951
Default  Posted: 7:54 PM, January 21st (Tuesday)

I lied..I can''t seem to change the movie tonight. Now the scene just has me in tears. Looking for a movie called "strength''" . Netflix just "ain''t" cutting it tonight. This is awful. I''d call my best friend, but he was the one who betrayed me.


" He paved paradise and put up a parking lot"
BS - me
WS- him
married 26 years, together since kids
D- Day Jan 4 2014
PMA- starting this moment
R - in MC. WH is in IC

Posts: 142 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: New York
Topic Posts: 8