New Beginnings
User Topic: I think y'all will understand...
Member # 24518
Happy  Posted: 8:53 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

I just paid my annual HOA fees.

Before the due date (just barely, they''re due tomorrow)

On time, for the first time since the divorce. And I wrote a check. I didn''t have to put it on a credit card.

It seems like such a little thing, but damn, it makes me feel like I really am finally heading in the right direction financially.

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect

Posts: 12164 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 8:57 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13787 | Registered: Jul 2011
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 8:59 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

Woo Hoo!!!

Good for you!


Fidelity isn't a's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!

Posts: 21068 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

I totally understand. You are taking names and kicking ass!!

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 9:03 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

I so understand. 17 years of my life I could not do that. Now I do exactly what you do. I have less money available to me be before when I look at it on an income basis but I seem to be able to pay for everything on time and still have a little left over. Congrats! It feels great.

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
Member # 33882
Default  Posted: 9:19 AM, January 30th (Thursday)


me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11

Divorced 1/17/2013

"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."

Posts: 2601 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: MA
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

After bills last month...oh and necessities (unexpectedly had to replace car battery), I had just a $38 before the next paycheck hit.
BUT, I didn't use the credit card for anything, including the unexpected emergency expenses that came up that month!
Woo hooo for all of us!

ETA: Oh, and I was still able to put money in savings and didn't touch it at all when the battery died!!!!!

[This message edited by StillLivin at 10:01 AM, January 30th (Thursday)]

I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2325 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 10:00 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

Posts: 499 | Registered: Jun 2012
Exit Wounds
Member # 32811
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

Whoo Hooo! You are over the hump and now you are enjoying the rewards...I am so happy for you!

Posts: 2486 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: With my dad...and my dog...
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 10:45 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

This is great news!! I remember having to make those payments. I don't think I ever got it paid off before swimming season started up.

"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie

Posts: 3432 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 11:01 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

Good for you!

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17484 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 11:36 AM, January 30th (Thursday)

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:52

Posts: 3205 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Member # 37895
Default  Posted: 12:46 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

Congratulations! I am in exactly the same position: paying bills on time and building up an emergency fund. No more collection calls or fear of what is going to be in the mail today. No more "loans" to the idiot so he could buy lunch out every single day, buy scratch cards and fund his OW. As someone said, I have less income but I am better off because I am not subsidizing him or his business. I paid his business insurance, advertising and taxes. Crazy.

It is called peace of mind.

Jemima Puddleduck is a trusting soul....
DD 1 Dec 2012; Divorced 11/13; 2 children
Me: BS (47) Him: WH (52) Her: 3 PA's
Ex bought a house, The Money Pit With Mold That Will Never Be Finished. He's living in the basement.

Posts: 726 | Registered: Dec 2012
Member # 38928
Default  Posted: 1:28 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

I SO get it! Congrats!

It is a great feeling to have that kind of control. I have loved being able to pay bills on time and not using credit cards to subsidize anything like the XPOS always did (even gas for cars)! XPOS was ALWAYS robbing Peter to pay Paul because he had champagne taste on a beer budget. Drove me insane, and is the reason why I have a huge financial mess to slowly dig my way out of. But I am getting there, albeit slowly!

Those little milestones are so very significant!

BS - Me
XPOS - too many OW/OCs over 20+yrs
Kids - DDs 23,18 -DS20 Deceased
M Dissolved 2013

This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man ~ Shakespeare, Hamlet

Posts: 1178 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Rising out of Hell's ashes!
Member # 41033
Default  Posted: 1:42 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

Standing and aplauding!!!!!!

Posts: 384 | Registered: Oct 2013 | From: Illinois
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 1:45 PM, January 30th (Thursday)


Posts: 35791 | Registered: Mar 2011
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 2:14 PM, January 30th (Thursday)


You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams

Posts: 25687 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 24518
Default  Posted: 8:29 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

and to continue with finally being on the right financial path, I became eligible this week to sign up for the company 401k so I got that taken care of today, too. Where I work will match the 1st 6% so I'm squeezing the budget to contribute 6%. It's not a ton of money, but it's a lot better than not having any retirement funds.

Say what you wanna say and let the words fall out...honestly
I wanna see you be brave

Pretty pretty please, don't you ever ever feel
Like you're less than, less than perfect

Posts: 12164 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: TX
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 8:38 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

Major yay!

You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams

Posts: 25687 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 27148
Default  Posted: 10:15 PM, January 30th (Thursday)

Donít get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well.†

Posts: 2701 | Registered: Jan 2010
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, February 1st (Saturday)

Love, love, love this

Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 3:19 PM, February 1st (Saturday)

That's great inconnu! What an inspiration!

My goal this year is to completely pay off my credit card - no more debt but the mortgage!

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4607 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 5:02 PM, February 1st (Saturday)


Enjoy your road to financial freedom and responsibility. It's all part of taking care of you... you are doing it and doing it well.


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5254 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
Topic Posts: 23