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User Topic: OW wont stop antagonizing
Allornothing
Member
Member # 42354
Default  Posted: 1:02 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

I would appreciate some solid advice on what to do when the OW will not leave us alone. She is (unfortunately) our next door neighbour, and a former close friend. Since dday (sept 2013), My WS and I have been undergoing IC and MC, and things are up and down, but moving along.
The biggest issue at the moment is that this person will not leave us be. She stands on her driveway yelling insults at me (never WS), hoses the colourbond fence that divides our properties when she knows I will be sleeping (I'm a shift-worker) and all of a sudden her pets keep escaping into our yard and she enters our property to retrieve them, and refuses to leave when asked. The less we react, the worse she gets...
I am not interested in playing stupid games with this woman, I'm busy working on healing.
I just don't know what to do about it, and how to deal with the resentment I feel towards WH when she carries on like this. I would appreciate any and all help with this issue.


Me- BS 42
Him- FWH 42
Married 19 years, Together 25
Kids- 23,21,15,14
D Day- 7 Sept 2013
OW- Irrelevant

Posts: 175 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Australia
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 1:14 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Keep a VAR on you next time she talks to you like that.
Hire a lawyer to send a cease-and-desist. Look into filing harassment/stalking charges.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 3724 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
itainteasy
Member
Member # 31094
Default  Posted: 7:47 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Can you get a restraining order? Call the police when she's on your property and won't leave.

Fuck that bitch.

Is moving an option for you? Because that bitch will NEVER move, not while she can make life hard for you where she is.


Posts: 3355 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: NWPA
LA44
Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 8:01 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Can your H approach her directly and calmly say that given the hurt and damage already caused towards you, any words, any meandering onto your property, any unnecessary noise will no longer be tolerated and will be dealt with by the authorities. Make sure the whole ordeal is being recorded bc she will start screaming at that point.

She sounds quite "off" too so I would be apt to move - find fresher air in another neighbourhood!


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2228 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
LA44
Member
Member # 38384
Default  Posted: 8:01 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Can your H approach her directly and calmly say that given the hurt and damage already caused towards you, any words, any meandering onto your property, any unnecessary noise will no longer be tolerated and will be dealt with by the authorities. Make sure the whole ordeal is being recorded bc she will start screaming at that point.

She sounds quite "off" too so I would be apt to move - find fresher air in another neighbourhood!


Me: 44
He: 47 WH
Married: 15 years
D Day: December 2012
Affair: Fall 2009 - Dec. 2011
R is not linear

Posts: 2228 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada, eh
steadfast1973
Member
Member # 24719
Default  Posted: 8:46 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

How are she and her pets getting in your yard? Put locks on the gates, if you have them.


Me- 40- BS Him- 36- WH D-day#1 5/25/09 3 mo. EA d-day#2 11/06/13 Prostitute 11/5/13 in R
"I've seen your flag on the marble arch, our love is not a victory march, it's a cold and broken hallelujah."- Leonard Cohen

Posts: 2256 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Midwest
Chefj9
Member
Member # 38604
Default  Posted: 8:52 AM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Get a restraining order, file a complaint with the HOA if you have one and lock your gates.


ME - BS 49, Him - WS 46 trying to "R"
4 DD's - blended 25, 15, 15 and 12
Multi DDays the grand finale 5/13/2013
From here on out, I am only interested in what is real. Real people, real feelings, that's it, that's all I'm intere

Posts: 470 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Texas
Allornothing
Member
Member # 42354
Default  Posted: 5:47 PM, February 5th (Wednesday)

Thank you all for the advice, it is much appreciated. You are all correct in stating that there is something "off" about her. We are currently completing a full renovation, and will be putting the home on the market.
I'm so glad I found this site, there are many out there that are all about bitterness and put-downs, but this site, and the people who post, are more about sensible help and support. Again, thank you.


Me- BS 42
Him- FWH 42
Married 19 years, Together 25
Kids- 23,21,15,14
D Day- 7 Sept 2013
OW- Irrelevant

Posts: 175 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Australia
deena04
Member
Member # 41741
Default  Posted: 6:08 PM, February 5th (Wednesday)

How about a no trespassing sign facing her direction and if it persists, a cop to remind her of that. I know it could make it worse, but it's already bad it seems.


Me BS mid-late 30s
Him WS knocking on 40 (lovemywife4ever)
blended family with lots of kiddos
together 5 years, married 8/13
D day 12/1/13
WH ONS had been 4/12
Getting ME back and moving to HAPPY - whatever that means
I want out!

Posts: 877 | Registered: Dec 2013
Topic Posts: 9