I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this.
I'm divorced, former WS. I cheated on my wife many times throughout our 20 year marriage. I don't want to rehash all the details.
My problem is learning to live with the guilt of what I've done. I hurt my ex-wife and I hurt my kids. My kids know that I cheated on their mom. They say they love me and forgive me. I'm just having a really difficult time dealing with the guilty feelings and remorse.
To complicate matters, I moved very far away to take a job that I needed to take to help with my financial situation. So, I don't get to see my kids as much as I would like. I talk to them everyday.
I feel awful about the things I did to my ex-wife. She's getting her life back together and moving on. I think she's dating some dude. It hurts me to think that my kids will see him more than they see me. It really really hurts. I really fucked things up.
I've apologized to her many times and she says she's ok. I still care about her, despite my prior actions.
I need to get back to IC. I should be able to afford it now.
Can anyone recommend a good book or something that I could do to help assuage my guilt?
Me: FWS 45
Divorced and still trying to figure out why I was so crazy for so long. I do know this however: lies and deception lead to unhappiness.