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Just Found Out
User Topic: Update, toward R
peoplepleaser
Member
Member # 41535
Default  Posted: 10:33 AM, February 11th (Tuesday)

Last night she asks to talk and agrees to transparency. Then she says she will call a couples therapist today and bood an appointment for us so that we have an emotionally safe place to process the EAs. Then she asked me to dinner Friday. Of the four parts we need to agree to R, I am seeing three with the promise of one. She is not engaging in an A right now, she is in IC and we are scheduling MC, and she is being transparent. She claims she feels remorse but is not yet ready to express it, which is part of the MC work.

So, I'm cautiously dumping the 180 and going to dinner for Valentines Day. I'm hopeful.


WS: 39--2 EAs
BS: 39--me, faithful
DS: 6
9 year relationship in R.
DDay #1: September 6, 2013 EA for 5 weeks August 2013.
DDay #2: January 2, 2014 EA for 6 weeks summer 2011.
"I am still learning." -Michelangelo

Posts: 697 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: Midwest
ziganska
Member
Member # 41690
Default  Posted: 10:53 AM, February 11th (Tuesday)

Yay, Peoplepleaser! Any and all steps forward are good and in the right direction! That fourth part will come in time for sure!


Me: 42
Him: 49
DD: 12/2/2013
Married: 9 years but together for 15
Recovering, Reconciling, Rebuilding, Restoring

Posts: 123 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: New York
norabird
Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 11:18 AM, February 11th (Tuesday)

Wishing you the very best and that all these signs will turn out to be the real thing. (((hugs))) If you see any backsliding, you'll know what to do; but I hope you don't get put in that position.


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
NeverAgain2013
Member
Member # 38121
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)

She is not engaging in an A right now...

Good luck to you. When having to make statements like the quoted one above, it just kind of drives home the point of how skewed our realities have become compared to others who haven't dealt with this.


Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.

Posts: 1807 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
NeverAgain2013
Member
Member # 38121
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)

She is not engaging in an A right now...

Good luck to you. When having to make statements like the quoted one above, it just kind of drives home the point of how skewed our realities have become compared to others who haven't dealt with this.


Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.

Posts: 1807 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
NeverAgain2013
Member
Member # 38121
Default  Posted: 3:25 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)

She is not engaging in an A right now...

Good luck to you. When having to make statements like the quoted one above, it just kind of drives home the point of how skewed our realities have become compared to others who haven't dealt with this.


Be careful - that 'knight in shining armor' may very well be nothing more than an assclown wrapped in tin foil.
ME: 50+ years old and cute as a button :-)
Ex-WBF: Just a lying, cheating, gravy-sucking pig - and I left him in 2012.

Posts: 1807 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: USA
iamsoblind42
Member
Member # 42022
Default  Posted: 4:47 PM, February 11th (Tuesday)

Happy Valentines Day. I hope you have a wonderful dinner.


I'm a survivor, I'm gonna make it, I will survive, keep on surviving...

BS: me 42
WH: 48
2 kids
Married 18 years
D-day - 1/11/14
Filed - 1/16/14
Divorced 4/21/14
Walked in on WH and BF while her H watched


Posts: 209 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Colorado
Topic Posts: 7