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Reconciliation
User Topic: OW has tried to break NC
veronique12
Member
Member # 42185
Default  Posted: 10:31 AM, February 14th (Friday)

OW has tried to make direct contact with H, about 2 months after NC was established. She sent him an IM saying "help pls." H told me right away and has blocked her so she couldn't send another. Really glad he told me but I can't help but feel anxiety about what her next move might be. She's obviously attention starved and is trying to manipulate him into contact.

She did favorite a tweet of his on Twitter last month using her company account and H has blocked that too.

Seems like she's getting a little bolder. Wonder if I'll be getting a knock on the door soon. Ugh!


BW: me (38)
WH: 43
OW: false "friend"
D-Day: 11/29/13 (4 month EA discovered); 12/19/13 (discovered was also PA); TT thru 2/14
Married: 2001; Together for nearly 20 years
2 beautiful young kids

Posts: 492 | Registered: Jan 2014
tushnurse
Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 10:55 AM, February 14th (Friday)

(((V)))

You have many things to be happy about here. Number one being you H telling you immediately. That is just an awesome thing.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8457 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Lovedyoumore
Member
Member # 35593
Default  Posted: 10:57 AM, February 14th (Friday)

The OW tried this for months. She emailed, called, randomly showed up at places where she knew we would be, left notes and gifts outside my H office door and with the receptionist. It was pathetic. My H's IC was very emphatic that we stay NC and never give her any attention. He likened it to feeding a vampire and we had to starve it. It was very hard, but my H brought me every little gift and note she left. The email account she was using came directly to me and my H forwarded every text she sent. She kept it up for months. The last time she showed her face in person she actually walked into our church one Sunday morning.

Keep NC, but keep evidence of any contact she makes, just in case you need it.


Me 52
WH 52
Married 30+ years
Together trying to R

I tell people I am tired but really my heart is broken and I am sad.


Posts: 1468 | Registered: May 2012 | From: Southern, bless your heart
veronique12
Member
Member # 42185
Default  Posted: 11:13 AM, February 14th (Friday)

Yes, tush, I do feel happy about it. Him coming clean about anything on his own is a big step. He looked absolutely terrified when telling me. I guess he thought I would fly off the handle, but instead I thanked him.

Yikes, lovedyoumore! Praying OW doesn't have 1/100 of that persistence. She is kooky but prefers a more sneaky underhanded approach.


BW: me (38)
WH: 43
OW: false "friend"
D-Day: 11/29/13 (4 month EA discovered); 12/19/13 (discovered was also PA); TT thru 2/14
Married: 2001; Together for nearly 20 years
2 beautiful young kids

Posts: 492 | Registered: Jan 2014
SorrowBhindSmile
Member
Member # 38139
Default  Posted: 11:21 AM, February 14th (Friday)

The fact that your WH told you immediately, blocked her # and such is huge. Your response was huge too. You created a safe place for your WH...he felt like he could tell you.....your WH created a safe place for you by telling you. Working together...open, honest, transparent.

Keep up with the crickets. No contact. ignore it all. the stress and anxiety of wondering what her next move will be is nerve wracking. i lived with it for over 6 months. I feel your pain. Stay strong. she will go away eventually

hugs to you!


Me: BW
Him: WH
OW: My former "dear friend"/neighbor
Married 20+
Kids: 3
D-Day 12/2012
Committed to R 7/8/2013
"Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle"

Posts: 357 | Registered: Jan 2013
Topic Posts: 5