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User Topic: Oh my gosh!
Jacobswife
New Member
Member # 42534
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

I understand that you catch more flys with honey then vinegar but I have to honey to give! I am full of Pisa and vinegar because he wants to be the victim but I didn't cheat, he did! Please, please help me! I want to be understanding and feel bad for him, but I don't and don't think I should have too! Shaking, sick to my stomach, and wanting to walk away!


Me:46
WH:42
Married: 13 years, Together: 15 years
Kids: daughter 12, son 9
Dday: January 10, 2014
Trying to reconcile!

Posts: 25 | Registered: Feb 2014
Jacobswife
New Member
Member # 42534
Default  Posted: 8:31 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

Should say piss and vinegar! Sorry for my typos!


Me:46
WH:42
Married: 13 years, Together: 15 years
Kids: daughter 12, son 9
Dday: January 10, 2014
Trying to reconcile!

Posts: 25 | Registered: Feb 2014
Breezy150
Member
Member # 42421
Default  Posted: 8:47 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

You have no reason to feel sorry for him. None of his choices are your fault, you didn't deserve it. He needs to own his own crap. All of it.


I am so disappointed when a liar's pants don't actually start on fire.

BS me 41
WH 42 his whore was my friend
Married 24 years
Finally finding R?
3 kids 3 grand kids
DDay 1 -Jan 2 2014
DDay 2 -Feb 20 2014 A went underground fo


Posts: 539 | Registered: Feb 2014
JustWow
Member
Member # 19636
Default  Posted: 8:50 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

Blameshifting, re-writing of the relationship history, justifying and distorted reality are all chapters in the cheaters handbook. And all utter bull$hit.

You may catch more flies with honey, but who the hell wants a fly?


BW - Reconciling

edited for typos (I always have to!)


Posts: 3585 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Midwest
4everfaithful83
Member
Member # 41761
Default  Posted: 8:56 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

Why the hell would you feel bad for him?? He's the one who cheated. If he's making you feel that way then you are with an un-remorseful WH.

Read about and practice the 180...pronto!!

He should be kissing your ass right now...not the other way around...


Always know if the juice is worth the squeeze...

ME: 31
WBF: 27
Together 7 years
1 doggie
DDay: June 24, 2013
IN R...


Posts: 565 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: Pennsylvania
norabird
Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 8:59 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

Is he complaining about his treatment from you? Wah wah wah. Cry me a river! Actions, meet consequences. Don't spare a thought for how he wishes you were being nicer. I bet you wish he didn't cheat!!!!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 3734 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
strangeasfiction
Member
Member # 42160
Default  Posted: 9:00 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

I want to be understanding and feel bad for him, but I don't and don't think I should have too!
You shouldn't feel badly for him for what he did! Do you think he would feel badly for you if you were the one who cheated? Of course not. I know there are many emotions operating on many different levels. You might feel badly for him for other reasons, but please don't mistake that for needing to feel badly for him because of the terrible choice he made.


Me - BS 39
Her - WW 34
Kids - 3 & 1
Married - 9 years
Status - FUBAR

Posts: 211 | Registered: Jan 2014
mainlyinpain
Member
Member # 39134
Default  Posted: 9:00 PM, February 23rd (Sunday)

Don't let him play the victim in any way.
He had enough time making himself feel good, whatever pain he is feeling is his rewards for his choices. Your pain was not due to any choices you made.

LOL "You may catch more flies with honey, but who the hell wants a fly?" LOL

ROTFL Picturing my WH head on a buzzing fly's body!


DD 1 - 7/7/2004
DD 2 - 10/31/2011
DD 3 - 4/30/2013(or continuation?)(Yes)
DD 4 - 9/25/2013
DD 5 - 2/15/2014 (found phone from 2009)

Posts: 481 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 8