User Topic: Scumbag Father Vent
Member # 41429
Default  Posted: 10:53 AM, February 24th (Monday)

Yesterday, STBX took DD for a few hours of time.

He wanted to keep her until 8:30. But her bedtime is 7:30. So I told him she shouldn't be out past 6:30 and to have her back by then. He agreed saying he would "make every effort"... right. Sure you will.

I get a text saying that dinner was late and therefore, he would be late. Guess what time he shows up... 8:30... His original time.

And then, to top it all off, DD (my toddler DD) reeeeeeeeked of cigarette smoke. I bet he was smoking in the car with her. Fuckin' father of the year over here.


Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13

Posts: 497 | Registered: Nov 2013
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 11:12 AM, February 24th (Monday)

What an ass.
Antics like this are exactly why parenting agreements need to be spelled out and detailed down to the last letter.

If you have one in place, the next time he's more than 15 minutes late, call the police on his ass.
If you DONT have one in place, I'd try to start making sure his visiting time is a lot earlier in the day so it doesnt interrupt DD's routine as much.

Me - 42
SorryInSac (WH#2) - 47. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - Stick a fork in me...

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids - 4 dogs, 2 cats

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW) - Legally married 18yrs

I edit often for clarity.

Posts: 6533 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 11:38 AM, February 24th (Monday)

I hear you, Foggy. Whenever I try to impose limits on The Princess, she always just does whatever the hell she wants anyhow. Just has to prove she has a bigger dick than me!

I''ve finally adopted a similar approach to her as I have to parenting: If it''s something that I have no control over, I try not to express any desire to control it. That gives them the ability to do whatever they please, and eventually figure out how little control I have.

And there are few phrases that piss me off so much as "make every effort". It is apparently just as meaningless as our wedding vows were.

Loyal spouse: Me; Disloyal spouse: The Princess
Two sons: Now 11 and 14
DDay: Nov 15, 2012
Separated: Mar 2, 2013 after 17 year marriage, now divorcing!

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous

Posts: 2095 | Registered: Jan 2013
Member # 11185
Default  Posted: 11:53 AM, February 24th (Monday)

IMO, smoking around a child is abuse.

Any adult who smokes around a child needs to serve jail time.

What a POS!

BW -- 57
Divorced 2001
Re-married 2014--on what would have been our 35th anniversary

Posts: 427 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: NC
Member # 41429
Default  Posted: 1:33 PM, February 24th (Monday)


And there are few phrases that piss me off so much as "make every effort". It is apparently just as meaningless as our wedding vows were.

When he emailed that, I knew exactly what he was going to do. At that point, it was a wait and document game.

Another one of his


Afraid2LoveAgain, I agree completely.

I am a former smoker (and took it up for a minute after DDay) but never would I expose DD to it and I go out of my way to make sure she isn't. Smoking was one of my biggest issues with STBX.

We are drawing up an agreement now. I am trying to make sure all the bases are covered. What a dick

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13

Posts: 497 | Registered: Nov 2013
Member # 42510
Default  Posted: 1:44 PM, February 24th (Monday)

I smoke. I gave myself permission to smoke as much as I need during this time. However, I NEVER smoke around the kids. I always go outside, and never in the car when they're with me. GabyBaby is right, that probably needs spelled out in the parenting agreement, and I'm more than willing to sign one when the time comes to write ours.

"Somebody get this walking carpet out of my way." Princess Leia, Star Wars

Posts: 296 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Kansas
Member # 14918
Default  Posted: 1:56 PM, February 24th (Monday)

It's illegal to smoke with a child in the car. Email him and document. If it happens again, call CPS.

Just HOW stupid do you think I am, exactly?

Posts: 1203 | Registered: Jun 2007
Member # 41429
Default  Posted: 1:27 PM, February 25th (Tuesday)

I emailed him about it.

He says he quit (This is my I believe you face ) He then said that the only person he know who smoke around DD is me (I guess he doesn't know I quit). Then he pointed out my headlights are out. (No, dear. Just one. And now he is trying to turn it around on me. Yay.)

I want to respond.

It would go

Congratulations on quitting smoking. I did myself over 2 months ago. DD will be so lucky to grow up with non smoking parents.

Thanks for pointing out my passenger side headlight is out. I did notice it myself. I rarely drive when it is that dark and your extreme lateness dropping DD off afforded me that opportunity.

Have a great day!

And when you read "great" read it "gggrrrrreeaaaaaaatttttt"

[This message edited by littlefoggy at 1:29 PM, February 25th (Tuesday)]

Me: BW 30
WH 37
DDay 11/12/13

Posts: 497 | Registered: Nov 2013
Topic Posts: 8