Off Topic
User Topic: Open Letter to Exit Wounds
Member # 35985
Default  Posted: 6:19 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

My dearest E-Dub,

I am so truly sorry for the sudden loss of your beloved father. I can only imagine how distraught and upset you are feeling.

I can totally relate. About 8 years ago, I was informed by phone, while driving to work, that my mother was had been very unexpectedly hospitalized. In my fear and panic and distraction, I promptly rear-ended the car in front of me. Fortunately, the damage was minor but, of course, I felt AWFUL!! I was a total and complete MESS. At a time when you are barely thinking straight, through no fault of your own, and just trying to get off the road and grasp your new reality .... blinker, schminker, I say.

In my humble opinion, if this community can send hugs and support to other members grappling with other, err, 'driving woes', I think you deserve at least the same courtesy and respect. I'm so sorry you felt more pain on top of all you are dealing with.

I respect that you asked for your thread to be locked so need to reply here.

I hope your memories of your dear father will get you through the hardest days ahead and that your grief may pass gently on its way.

I am holding you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

With deepest sympathy,

Me: Finding my Sunlight
Him: Traitor in my Foxhole
Let go or get dragged.

Posts: 1252 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: a state of consciousness
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 6:35 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

Sorry to hear you lost your dad.

I've always appreciated your participation and hope you will be back when it feels right. I don't expect any response since you are done for now.

Blessings to your family,

BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. Now I am living alone in the beautiful rural property that was once the dream retreat with X. It's taking a long time to create new dreams but despite some struggles I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5871 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Grace and Flowers
Member # 34431
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

Thanks for pointing out one important thing IMO (other than the obvious condolences). I was saddened to see some of the same people who offered hugs and "glad you weren't hurt!" and "I'm sorry this happened to you!" to a drunk driver respond with sarcasm and derision to EW.

People make driving errors. Many of those errors can kill. If we're going to offer comfort to one person who makes a dumb mistake (as others refer to opinion on choosing to have one single drink, and then drive, are post), then we should offer those same "hugs" to someone else. Or should we offer equal condemnation, and sarcasm?

The 2x4s on the other thread were sound, logical, rational, and respectful. And deserved. But EW was met with sarcasm and mocking for her driving error.

Wouldn't it be nice if we all realized we're not perfect, we all do something stupid sometimes on the road, whether we mean to or not? Not to say that 2x4s aren't warranted...but why are some accompanied by sympathy...and others by scorn? We would all do well to remember that a split second decision that we make is able to end another's life....ALL of us.

I'm Happy, not Sad!

Posts: 1177 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: US
New Member
Member # 38497
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

EW, very sorry about your dad. Sending hugs and prayers to you and your family.

DD Aug.1/2012 with an ex gf had been seeing her the entire time we were together..

Posts: 18 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Canada
Member # 8803
Default  Posted: 9:30 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

I'm so sorry about your dad! Those emotional phone conversations can be difficult to get through. Immediately after my mom called to tell me that my dad was having kidney failure, I missed the bottom step on the stairs at work and severely broke my foot. You have my sincere sympathies.

M 11, D 8/1/05- not soon enough!

Posts: 217 | Registered: Nov 2005 | From: NY
Member # 39891
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, February 26th (Wednesday)

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how devastating such news can be. This news hits very close to home as tomorrow I will be attending the services of my dear FIL. Many of us share in your greif.

Posts: 111 | Registered: Jul 2013
Member # 42184
Default  Posted: 4:36 AM, February 27th (Thursday)

Exit Wounds, so sorry about the loss of your father and the added insult of a ticket AND uncaring comments from members here. I know from experience how the loss of a parent can make the mind into a foggy mush of mourning. You will get through this.

Me, WW
Him, BH
2 DDs
Together 9 yrs, married 4
Flirting/Boundary Breaking/Cheating for 8 years, OEA Fall 09-Feb 10 with flirty friend from 2007/2008, lied and rugswept until TT 12/13-02/14.

Posts: 74 | Registered: Jan 2014
SI Staff
Member # 10
Red  Posted: 6:34 AM, February 27th (Thursday)

EW has a history of starting controversial topics and then when met with different opinions she will abandon her thread.

As for the other member that had a driving issue, she was humble and knew what she had done was wrong. She wasn't asking for sympathy only help with the legalities.

You (general term) are welcome to offer condolences to Exit Wounds without causing division among members.

[This message edited by SI Staff at 6:39 AM, February 27th (Thursday)]

Posts: 10004 | Registered: May 2002
Member # 12145
Default  Posted: 1:13 PM, February 27th (Thursday)

As for the other member that had a driving issue, she was humble and knew what she had done was wrong. She wasn't asking for sympathy only help with the legalities.



I ♥ my Husband!!!

Posts: 2287 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Our happy place
Deeply Scared
Member # 2
Red  Posted: 1:29 PM, February 27th (Thursday)


You have a PM.

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)

My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.

Posts: 198436 | Registered: May 2002
weeping willow
Member # 22800
Default  Posted: 9:48 AM, February 28th (Friday)

EW, I'm so sorry for your loss of your father. Being no stranger to the loss of loved ones, I can totally understand your reaction (not using your signal light) upon the devastating news of your father's death. It would have been nice if the officer would have been more lenient in this case.


BW - me FWH - him
D Day - July 26, 2007
Married 36 years

Posts: 1793 | Registered: Feb 2009
Topic Posts: 11