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User Topic: Why does food lose its flavor after DDay?
castellana
New Member
Member # 42609
Default  Posted: 9:34 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I've been wondering why food seems to have lost it's flavor since DDay -seriously, the things I used to love just taste blah. Coffee, ice cream, spicy Indian and Mexican, even bacon. I just sort of nibble at things and drink protein shakes so I know I'm getting enough calories.

Plus since I've now started monitoring WH communication every time I check I just want to hurl and food is not just tasteless but gross.

What sort of psychological/biological reasons are there?


Posts: 35 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Colorado
flup
Member
Member # 21259
Default  Posted: 9:40 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I know exactly what you mean. I think it has to do with being in shock.

Personally, I was diagnosed with PTSD, and lost 40 pounds in the months after DDay.

Our bodies go into survival mode, I think. I'm sure it's something very primal.


Me: BS 55
Her: fWW 50

D-Day #1: 12 Aug. 2008. WW's 2nd affair w/college teacher.
D-Day #2: 18 June 2009. Affair #1 with neighbor was fall of 2002 - while I was coping with the fallout from 9/11.
Still trying to R.
22 years married


Posts: 430 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: Ohio
cliffside
Member
Member # 38803
Default  Posted: 9:41 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I don't have the answer but experienced this as well. Everything tasted like... Cardboard? I remember spitting food out because it tasted like paper or something. My doctor told me to drink smoothies or ensure. For some reason liquids were easier for me to get down than actual food.

Sorry you're going through this. I'm one year out and occasionally have days where I experience this - usually after a trigger. Otherwise, I'm back to tasting foods.

Hugs to you.


Me: BS 39
Him: WH 41
2 Kids
D-Day: 2/3/13
Broke NC 3/14
Very skeptically in R for now...

Posts: 269 | Registered: Mar 2013
ziganska
Member
Member # 41690
Default  Posted: 9:43 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I would love to hear the psychological and biological reasons too, but you are certainly not alone. I lost 30 lbs in 3 months (the first 20 were lost in the first month alone!). I lost my appetite too and was amazed that I was going days without even being hungry. Like you, food just made me sick, even the stuff I absolutely loved.

I think on a psychological level, it might be because our worlds have been completely turned upside down so that the normal things in life just don't seem necessary or important anymore. I stopped watching tv, reading the paper, I barely got myself up to shower and dress every day, so why would I suddenly want to enjoy a dinner? I remember almost feeling "guilty" for enjoying a meal....like there's no reason to enjoy anything anymore because my life is over.

I'm 3 months in now and starting to eat here and there but it's still really hard. You're right, nothing really tastes the same and truth be told, losing all this weight has made me feel pretty good so part of me wants some kind of "benefit" from this mess.

I'm glad you're drinking those shakes and drinks--that's the best thing you can do right now. And don't forget water, maybe soup, something light. It will come back to you over time, I'm sure, but what you are experiencing is completely normal.


Me: 42
Him: 49
DD: 12/2/2013
Married: 9 years but together for 15
Recovering, Reconciling, Rebuilding, Restoring

Posts: 123 | Registered: Dec 2013 | From: New York
craig2001
Member
Member # 55
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, February 28th (Friday)

Not only flavor, but a general loss of interest in eating and everything else. Which if you are not careful can turn into depression.

This is what is called the Infidelity Diet. The BS can and usually does lose lots of weight after DDay.


Posts: 4116 | Registered: Jun 2002
castellana
New Member
Member # 42609
Default  Posted: 10:07 AM, February 28th (Friday)

Styrofoam. Every morning I used to have egg whites in a pool of green chile sauce for breakfast. Set up a good day for me. No More. For some reason the texture is now unpleasant. I even tried moving from medium to spicy hot for the chiles and all I get is burn, no flavor. Strange.

Posts: 35 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: Colorado
joannie
Member
Member # 42486
Default  Posted: 10:19 AM, February 28th (Friday)

Don't know why but it did, does still sometimes, then i eat little or nothing..lost weight but slowly coming back from a stick to a pole..!!


me BS 56yr
Him WS 55yr
Married 34 years 2 sons 4 grandchildren

Posts: 131 | Registered: Feb 2014 | From: France
SeanFLA
Member
Member # 32380
Default  Posted: 10:23 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I remember almost feeling "guilty" for enjoying a meal

I had the same problem...lost 38. I felt guilty for anything I ate because I felt like I did something wrong and had to punish myself. Maybe I was so distraught that I thought WW did this because she didn't find me attractive anymore. So hence I needed to drop weight immediately. Really hard to explain. But know you will eventually find your appetite back once the stress begins to lift. The weight generally will come back. Even my doctor warned me as he's seen it many times with patients and infidelity. It's just temporary I'm afraid to say. The brain is an amazing organ.


BS(me) 48
WW 46
1 son 14 yrs old
Married 18 yrs, together 21 yrs

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have." ~ Bob Marley


Posts: 1470 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Zombie Land
tushnurse
Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, February 28th (Friday)

I would love to hear the psychological and biological reasons too, but you are certainly not alone.

Here is my take on this.....
We as humans are hardwired to a certain degree, and ultimately our purpose on earth is to survive and multiply. There are many basic functions of our bodies that happen based on this, and it all goes back to the caveman/early human/beginning of our beginning.

We see this as a very dangerous time, and our bodies go into the fight or flight mode, and for many of us that means we get an instant dump (vomiting or diarrhea) to allow us to be light to run and get away from the danger.

As time goes on and the risk is still ever present, our bodies are telling our minds to not eat, to stay prepared to take off at a moment notice because the thing that is coming for us is still coming.

Many if not all of us experience GI distress and upset in addition to weight loss as this all happens. Personally I lost a total of 30 pounds from the time I started suspecting something until my actual Dday, after Dday I dropped another 25 pounds in a matter of weeks. I couldn't eat, I would try, and I couldn't even swallow food in my mouth. It was bizzare for me, I had been through a lot of stress in my life, and had always been a stress eater. But this takes stress to whole new level.

You are doing the right thing by making sure you are getting the nutrition you need through protein shakes, and be sure to take vitamins as well. I can tell you that my immune system tanked after Dday as well, and I got sick very easily for the next year.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8714 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Breezy150
Member
Member # 42421
Default  Posted: 11:01 AM, February 28th (Friday)

Same here, but not just food everything has lost its flavor. The movies I loved, the music I loved, my passion for everything is gone.

I was diagnosed with PTSD a little over two years ago, long before DDay and it happened then too, I was just back to loving food and loving cooking again when DDay came. Not fair!

Besides my attitude is why bother with food if it is going to make me more miserable with the "dumping syndrome", easier just not to eat.


I am so disappointed when a liar's pants don't actually start on fire.

BS me 41
WH 42 his whore was my friend
Married 24 years
Finally finding R?
3 kids 3 grand kids
DDay 1 -Jan 2 2014
DDay 2 -Feb 20 2014 A went underground fo


Posts: 544 | Registered: Feb 2014
Ivyivy
Member
Member # 42110
Default  Posted: 8:54 PM, March 1st (Saturday)

I think that all BSs have been there. Since Dday I lost about 15 lbs and at this point I am actually trying to eat at least 1 solid meal a day. It is an effort. Lunch is the one meal that I can stomach. I can''t seem to do anything other than coffee for breakfast and a drink (wine) for dinner. The funny thing is that after Dday, I started running, which I still do. So basically I am down to a weight that is below pre-pregnancy and am wearing my 15 year old daughter''s clothes. Size 0 or 2 (which is baggy at times). That is life after Dday. It isn''t that I cannot taste food, it is just that I have zero interest in eating - even when I feel physically (not emotionally) hungry. I just try to stay healthy to the extent that I can. That is all I can do.


Me -BW
Him - WH
LTA
DS - 11 and DD - 15

Posts: 198 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Northeast
sweetangelbroken
Member
Member # 27191
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, March 1st (Saturday)

I agree that food tasted like cardboard and I just couldn't swallow it after my first d day. I lost 30 lbs. I can't ever before remember a time I didn't eat.
This time around I get hungry and food tastes ok but I feel full after a few tiny bites.
Living on coffee iced tea and Xanax. Avoiding wine because I fear I will be able to palate it.
I also agree that I view this temporary anorexia as one of the only benefits of this whole mess


married 28 years
dday 12/5/09
life is not about waiting for the storm to pass..it is about learning to dance in the rain

Posts: 178 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: chicagoland
sweetangelbroken
Member
Member # 27191
Default  Posted: 10:04 PM, March 1st (Saturday)

I agree that food tasted like cardboard and I just couldn't swallow it after my first d day. I lost 30 lbs. I can't ever before remember a time I didn't eat.
This time around I get hungry and food tastes ok but I feel full after a few tiny bites.
Living on coffee iced tea and Xanax. Avoiding wine because I fear I will be able to palate it.
I also agree that I view this temporary anorexia as one of the only benefits of this whole mess


married 28 years
dday 12/5/09
life is not about waiting for the storm to pass..it is about learning to dance in the rain

Posts: 178 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: chicagoland
Stillstings
Member
Member # 36549
Default  Posted: 11:20 PM, March 1st (Saturday)

It's part of the response to panic and fear.

When an animal in nature is being threatened, the body goes into fight or flight mode. Flight mode does a few things. It concentrates the energy you need into your extremities. Your stomach empties itself to lighten you up which is why puking and diarrhea are so common in the very beginning.

This may be TMI but when facing a predator, make yourself as disgusting as possible. Would a lion want to eat a gazelle that is covered in it's own fluids? Less likely.

Then the depression side. Food is something many of us enjoy. We associate it with things we like and when you've had your mind/emotions decimated, it's less interesting. It's also very cyclic in the way where you connect food with good times and you feel like you'll never have them again. Your world goes gray. Colors and taste go away.

It may also be rooted in guilt. I was shoved into the infidelity diet and I remember feeling like I was partly responsible for my situation so in a way I was punishing myself.


Love yourself. You're worth it. Face your self. You need to do it.

Posts: 367 | Registered: Aug 2012
Topic Posts: 14