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User Topic: Update on Anxiety and Uncertainty
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 9:08 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

I recently posted about my issues with feelings of anxiety and uncertainty. Also, I posted some time ago about a new job I was taking. It seemed like a good opportunity and the job was strictly working from home. I literally am the only employee for this company in the entire state. There have been other issues and stresses with the job but nothing that I couldn''t work through or deal with before. However, the sense of total isolation that has developed over time working 100% from home has amplified all of it. My previous employer doesn''t have any openings for me but I spoke to a lead earlier tonight and it looks promising. The program manager asked to complete the online application to, in his words, "move the process forward". I guess that''s a good sign? I''m hoping so anyway. This new job would be primarily from home but not 100%. I''d have colleagues locally and some travel and opportunities to interact more directly with the team. Probably no difference in money but their benefits seem to be better. More importantly I think the work and the team is a better fit for me.

What I''ve learned about myself is that for a basically introverted guy I prefer being around people.

It also occurs to me that if I weren''t living alone I can''t say with absolute certainty I would be having these issues. So being relationship-alone makes being work-alone untenable.

On the plus side I''ve learned something about myself.
On the opposite-of-plus side what I learned is something I can''t handle and makes me over-anxious.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
norabird
Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 9:16 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

Good for you! Hope the lead turns into something great. The main thing is you're taking action to get to a better situation for yourself. Sending job mojo!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:19 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

Fingers crossed for you, Brandon.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25716 | Registered: Aug 2011
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

Thank you norabird and nik.

I''m hoping it works out too. Even thinking of it working out makes me feel better.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
Williesmom
Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 9:37 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

Hoping you find the right fit.


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
sisoon
Member
Member # 31240
Default  Posted: 11:00 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

You might read The Psychology or Computer Programming by Gerry Weinberg for some comments on introverts needing people. It won't do much for you, but you might find it interesting. Weinberg is brilliant.

A thought - you might look into you local Chamber of Commerce for a SOHO group and other meetings. It gets you out and among people. Not a perfect fit for you, but you'd probably find other people with similar interest, some of whom may actually be single women with enthusiasm for life.


fBH (me) - 70 (22 in my head), fWW (plainsong) - 65+, Married 45+, together since 1965
DDay - 12/2010
Recovered, not yet fully R'ed
I share my own experience because it's the only experience I know, not because I'm a good model.

Posts: 10345 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: Chicago area
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 11:01 PM, March 16th (Sunday)

Thank you Williesmom

Appreciate everyone''s support.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 8:08 AM, March 17th (Monday)

Thanks sisoon. I look into that too.

I have found some local groups for my interest in creative writing, but that''s once a week.

I''m about to kick-off the week from hell. My current job has stacked so many meetings on this week that it is utterly ridiculous. One day at a time and praying for good news from that other opportunity.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 9:32 PM, March 17th (Monday)

Update on the update...

I''ve been told an offer letter is forthcoming. This position could be a great opportunity. It could be very risky. They''re looking for someone to be a quality manager because quality of the work on the project is having issues. I know a lot of the people on the project. I know the work in general. At a minimum it will get out of the 100% work from home position which is definitely not for me. If this job isn''t right-for-me it is at least right-for-now.

On the very positive side my resume and interview were strong enough to get me an offer letter going inside 48 hours. Happy about that.

Most of all I''m happy for the support of friends and family. That includes my friends here on SI who have been so supportive through some very dark and difficult moments over the past two years.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
norabird
Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 9:33 PM, March 17th (Monday)

That's amazing Brandon!!!!! Congrats!!!!


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, March 17th (Monday)

Thanks Norabird

I''m a little nervous. I''ve never been a job-hopper. My shortest stint was 3 years. Before that was 4 years.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
5454real
Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 9:45 PM, March 17th (Monday)

I'm really glad things are looking up for you Brandon. you know for an introvert you sure have a lot of friends.


BH 51, WW 42
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 20(Hers),DS 9 Ours, DGS 3, DGD 1 mo
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
“I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.”
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2979 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 9:50 PM, March 17th (Monday)

Thanks 5454real

Yes, I do have a lot of friends. And that irony is not lost on me that as an introvert I need to be around people.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 9:56 PM, March 17th (Monday)

Great news, Brandon. I'll keep mojo heading your way until it's all said and done.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25716 | Registered: Aug 2011
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 10:05 PM, March 17th (Monday)

Thank you nik

The mojo is much appreciated.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
SoVerySadNow
Member
Member # 36711
Default  Posted: 12:24 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Sending mojo.


Me:BW
Him:WH
D-day(s),after years of TT and Gaslighting was Labor Day Weekend 2012, continuing for a week after. *Dammit! More TT 3/9/13
Really trending toward D- planning about it is my "happy place" now.

Posts: 1292 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Sunny Florida
MovingUpward
Guide
Member # 14866
Default  Posted: 7:07 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Good luck Brandon

And still look to find an outside activity to get you in a non-work environment.


AKA Moo

Think of the haters in your life as sandpaper; they’ll scratch you up time and time again but in the end you’re polished, smooth, and spotless..while they end up useless

We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.


Posts: 52586 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Big Blue Nation
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 7:16 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Thanks SoVerySadNow. All mojo welcome

Thanks Moo
I''m working on that too. At the moment my current job has me pulling about 60-70 hours per weeks so that search will have to wait.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
brokensmile322
Member
Member # 35758
Default  Posted: 7:23 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Good luck Brandon! I don't think working from home would be good for me either. Fingers crossed for you!

[This message edited by brokensmile322 at 7:23 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)]


Me BS 42 Him WS 44
OW Coworker DDay April 7, 2012
EA on a slippery slope...

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. ~Viktor Frankl

"When you are happy, you can forgive a great deal."


Posts: 1539 | Registered: Jun 2012
Williesmom
Member
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Yay! You go, girl! Uh.... You go, guy!


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 10:32 PM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Thank you brokensmile322 and Williesmom

Soooooooo....I officially got an offer letter.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
StillLivin
Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 10:58 PM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Soooooooo....I officially got an offer letter

Woot woot...I'll drink a margarita to that!!!!


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2329 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
MissMouseMo
Member
Member # 38562
Default  Posted: 11:42 PM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Congratulations, Brandon! That's wonderful news. I'm glad you had mad resume and interviewing skills.

And: I will be cautiously optimistic with you but feel the need to say that Quality can be tough. I'd say it's not for those faint-of-heart among us who are conflict-avoidant. The Quality people I have worked with were looking over shoulders and critiquing (no, not necessarily criticizing), and scrutiny is uncomfortable so professional friends may be a little hard to find.

I'm really proud of you and very, very happy so don't think I'm raining on your parade - you have been a wonderful "voice" to hear on SI.

Just the offer confirms you've got what it takes so Huzzah!


It is the gut-wrenching, down-to-your-soul honesty that helps so much. ~paraphrased from CancunCrushed
"I edit, therefore I am." -BionicGal

Posts: 348 | Registered: Feb 2013
Brandon808
Member
Member # 35619
Default  Posted: 11:55 PM, March 18th (Tuesday)

Thank you and cheers StillLivin

Thanks MissMouseMo
I actually have worked in the Quality field before so it''s not that new for me. You''re right that it can be rough though but maybe that''s why they made the offer they did so quickly. It''s not a position most people would necessarily want.


xBH
D final 8/2012

Posts: 4000 | Registered: May 2012 | From: southeast
StillLivin
Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 12:09 AM, March 19th (Wednesday)

Clink! Back atchya brother!


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2329 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Topic Posts: 25