New Beginnings
User Topic: New Home New Beginning
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 4:11 PM, March 24th (Monday)

Well, I stood in my new house today, soaking it all in.

When I left ex, I essentially threw a dart and landed. Packed up the kids and left, found a cute little house and poured my heart into it. Ex had to co-sign the loan as I had no income. In less than 3 years, I made $30K on this house with all of the upgrades and design I put into it.

Over Christmas, bored, I went online and found a house in my 'hood with a one car garage (I currently have no garage) and on a culdesaq. I went to look at it and fell in serious "like". The sun in this new house is beautiful. Good bones.

I put my current house on the market, it sold in 6 days.

Today, I closed on my very first house….alone. This is MY house. I wasn't pressured to buy it. I simply did this because I wanted to, it makes sense for my kids and my place in life.

For some reason, this feels so much better. I am moving for happy reasons, not encumbered with the "I'm getting a divorce" strings that the first move gave me.

This is MY house. *I* bought it without a co-signer. MINE. I had the idea, I found it, I bought it.

The next couple of days will be hellish with the move, but I have my Mom helping me a little.

So, single Mom, moving, two special needs kids and in a hellish International Law grad school compressed class.

But, somehow…I just do all of this with little fanfare or complaint. I just do. Former New Guy kept saying, "How do you do all of this? You don't even seem stressed??" I dunno. I think I've had so much stress for so long….I just do.

I refuse to let fear drive me. If I want to do something…I just do.

Cheers to a NEW New Beginning.

me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings

Posts: 4175 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:14 PM, March 24th (Monday)

Congratulations, cmego! What a fabulous feeling that must be.

Wishing you endless days of joy in YOUR home.

You can call me NIK

"Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand."
-Hayley Williams

Posts: 25667 | Registered: Aug 2011
Member # 32616
Default  Posted: 4:29 PM, March 24th (Monday)

Congratulations on the new home. You're an inspiration

Posts: 3441 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: The Valley of the Sun
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 5:09 PM, March 24th (Monday)

Awesome! You rock!
I remember driving my little car 4 miles down the road to my new home with 2 moving vans following me. I felt so small and scared but empowered at the same time.

This is a wonderful new beginning for you. You deserve a round of applause

There is life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1664 | Registered: Mar 2004
Member # 20150
Default  Posted: 7:57 PM, March 24th (Monday)

As someone who has moved five times in as many years, I get it.

DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire

Posts: 17483 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, March 24th (Monday)


You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 7761 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 8:58 PM, March 24th (Monday)

Cmego--I am in awe of you!!!

Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
Member # 19946
Default  Posted: 9:40 PM, March 24th (Monday)

You are an inspiration!

Congratulations on your new home!

BS, age 53, d-day 6-2-08, divorced after 17 years and 20 together. Now I am living alone in the beautiful rural property that was once the dream retreat with X. It's taking a long time to create new dreams but despite some struggles I am mostly happy.

Posts: 5853 | Registered: Jun 2008 | From: Rural California
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 6:19 AM, March 25th (Tuesday)


Hope you and your kiddos have a wonderful life full of joy in your new home.

"Loving someone should not mean losing you. Love empowers you. It shouldn't erase you. - Thelma Davis.

Posts: 1358 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
Member # 33882
Default  Posted: 7:59 AM, March 25th (Tuesday)

Congrats on your home!!!!!!

me (BS)
him (NPD Ex)
2 dds
DDay 10/7/11

Divorced 1/17/2013

"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend, freedom is."

Posts: 2601 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: MA
little turtle
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 8:04 AM, March 25th (Tuesday)

Congratulations cmego!!! This is awesome!

Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4202 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, March 25th (Tuesday)


D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 1907 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
Member # 30997
Default  Posted: 11:22 AM, March 25th (Tuesday)

fantastic cmego - enjoy the new place...


Posts: 877 | Registered: Jan 2011
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 1:59 PM, March 25th (Tuesday)

Congratulations on the new house. Best wishes that you find it full of happiness and love.

"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie

Posts: 3432 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 7:36 PM, March 25th (Tuesday)

Congrats cmego! You are inspiring. I moved into my new house 18 months ago and I still have so much to do!

Can't wait to hear the progress and best of luck w the move. If I were closer I would love to help!

Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling

Posts: 4607 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
Member # 8923
Default  Posted: 5:00 PM, March 26th (Wednesday)

YEY!!!!!!!! Good beginnings to you, and good middle part and so on and so forth! Are you planning on any future house flipping? It sounds as if you have quite a bit of skill at it.

In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer..Albert Camus

***Used to be hit-by-a-train***
Remarried 2/14/14

Posts: 2295 | Registered: Nov 2005 | From: USA
Member # 39193
Default  Posted: 5:51 PM, March 26th (Wednesday)

What an awesome post!!!


Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage. ~ Anais Nin

Posts: 911 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Oregon
Member # 33606
Default  Posted: 11:15 PM, March 26th (Wednesday)

YAY!, CMEGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(And yes, my all caps meaning I'm yelling!)


Posts: 1702 | Registered: Oct 2011
Member # 34722
Default  Posted: 11:38 PM, March 26th (Wednesday)


Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

Posts: 2379 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: the Other Side
Member # 32558
Default  Posted: 4:52 AM, March 27th (Thursday)

love this post!

Yes, what is it with men who seemed "threatened" by our ability to cope with life?? I just don't get it? I've been on plenty of dates, and the positive response I give to what happened to me seems to baffle them…they just can't understand why I'm not a crumbling mess….maybe that's where we go wrong?? Do men want to "save" us???
Sorry to hijack your thread….but the response from your XSO interested me.

"Sometimes on the way to the dream, you get a lost and find a better one"

Divorcing - at last!

Posts: 94 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: Uk
Member # 30346
Default  Posted: 11:03 AM, March 27th (Thursday)

Checking in from new home chaos.

I am exhausted, no doubt…but finding the joy in a house I really love. I left the old house, and realized I will not miss it at all. I wonder if I had some negative connotations attached to it. It was serious "down grade" when I bought it. I worked so hard, it drove me, gave me something to do when I was trying to recover from ex-H. But, I won't miss it.

Dignity…I've complained about this before, people assume I should SHOW that I am devastated by everything that has happened in my life. I'm just not, because I choose not to be. I am told constantly that I am an inspiration, and I don't really get it. XSO seemed to be better than most people with it, truly admired me. But the only other guy that I've seriously dated couldn't handle it.

I don't understand men at all.

me...BS, 43 years old, 2 small kids
WS, 41, multiple gay affairs
M 15 years, together 17

"For whatever we lose, like a you or a me, it's always ourselves we find in the sea" ee cummings

Posts: 4175 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: South
Topic Posts: 21