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Divorce/Separation
User Topic: Hey gonnabe2016, you were right
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 10:48 PM, April 16th (Wednesday)

I think it was a month ago, ex-shat said that he couldn't pick Teslet up for his weekend, could we switch next weekend?

My response, "That weekend is unavailable for a switch because Teslet is travelling with me as per my text on 5 March"

gonna, I think you said that I probably needed to be more clear because he would start assuming that every weekend is his 'make-up' weekend.

Yep...so I get a text tonight..."Don't forget that I'm going to pick up Teslet this Friday for my make up weekend."

Uh.
No.

(Oh and let's not forget how he likes to stir up drama before a court date...that shit put me in crazy zone last October.) I thought that maybe I had gotten by this time without his shit. Yep. Wrong there too. (I'm sure he doesn't know the court date has been moved back yet as the notice went to his dad's house.)

Okay. So I've learned. Do not try to reason with this idiot. Do not explain. And for the love of god, stop assuming that he will figure shit out.

My response to him: "There is no make up weekend. You asked for a switch, I was not able to switch. You sent no further communications, so the weekend is forfeit."

My phone is now turned off for the night.
The mantrum is coming. But he can go fuck himself.

I wish I didn't care...but I'm shaking right now.
Fuck him.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
nekorb
Member
Member # 40306
Default  Posted: 10:52 PM, April 16th (Wednesday)

Ugh. I'm sorry.

I know I've gotten to where I hate the thought of opening my email because of whatever WH may have sent.we still live in the same house but communicate mostly via email.

Good for you for shutting your phone off. Ty not to give it too much thought.


Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 aka CAT- colossal asshat; Married 22 years
D-day: July 17, 2013, with TT to follow
D filed July 16, 2014, 363 days later than I should have
Psalms 27:14
Wait for The Lord; be strong and take heart. Wait for the Lord.

Posts: 1838 | Registered: Aug 2013
dmari
Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 10:52 PM, April 16th (Wednesday)

Good job turning off the phone! Let it go to voicemail ... easier to document anyway. I totally get the wishing you didn't care and shaking. (((((tesla)))))


Me (BS): 43 Children: DD 19, DS 15
Divorced September 30, 2014
"It's always darkest before the dawn ..."

Posts: 2270 | Registered: Oct 2012
ThoughtIKnewYa
Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 10:56 PM, April 16th (Wednesday)

Oh and let's not forget how he likes to stir up drama before a court date...that shit put me in crazy zone last October.
Don't let him do that to you again. He's knows he's better off if he can keep you off-balance.

(((tesla)))


Posts: 11742 | Registered: Mar 2008
FirstLoveGone
Member
Member # 25957
Default  Posted: 11:05 PM, April 16th (Wednesday)

Oh Tesla. I know exactly how feel.

Douche and I communicate via email only, but everytime I see a message from him in my inbox I start to shake as well. And he too, always likes to start shit at the most inopportune times.

Good for you for shutting off the phone.


Posts: 1274 | Registered: Oct 2009
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 12:19 AM, April 17th (Thursday)

My favourite NIKism: "They know which buttons to press because they installed the fuckers!!". Go for a run, punch a bag whatever it takes. Don't even read his idiotic missives coming your way.

I think he really is that dumb - nobody is this good an actor. How the fuck does he manage to breathe in AND out? Gold star for you for achieving that feat, fuckwit!!


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5609 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 7:56 AM, April 17th (Thursday)

Have you tried turning it into a game? I know it sounds silly, but when we turn a stressful situation into a "fun" one, it reclaims control and power in these instances.

So, I propose a game:
1. How many texts do we all think exshat can manage to send tonight?
2. Predict the text of ANY of exshat's texts or phone messages. (feel free to add as many as you want)

10 points for exact number on #1; 5 points if you're within 5 (+ or -)
3 points each for predicting the general subject matter of any text
50 points for matching at least 6 consecutive words used by exshat (+10 for each additional consecutive word)
100 points each for predicting exshat's spelling mistakes.

Prize to be determined.

[This message edited by Amazonia at 11:04 AM, April 17th (Thursday)]


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
Dreamboat
Member
Member # 10506
Default  Posted: 8:46 AM, April 17th (Thursday)

100 points for predicting exshat's spelling mistakes.


And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off
-- Shake It Out, Florence And The Machine

Posts: 17683 | Registered: Apr 2006 | From: A better place :)
norabird
Member
Member # 42092
Default  Posted: 4:14 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

((((tesla))))


Sit. Feast on your life.

Posts: 4196 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: NYC
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 4:46 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

I think you said that I probably needed to be more clear because he would start assuming that every weekend is his 'make-up' weekend.

Yep...so I get a text tonight..."Don't forget that I'm going to pick up Teslet this Friday for my make up weekend."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! OMG, that is hi-lar-i-ous!
That first exchange a while back was just SO fucking moronic on his part. No conversation or anything with you.....just random "so it's my make-up weekend, right?" for like, 6 weeks or something wasn't it?


I hope that I'm laughing *with* you (and you don't feel as if I'm laughing at you).....because I know that having to deal with a person, who has NO concept of boundaries or *rules*, every.single.time there is contact is awful.
Sounds like *dealing with stupid* should be listed as one of the causes of a 'trauma reaction.'

Hope you're doing ok today and that he isn't giving you a hard time over this.
(Was that older original post also the one where you just kept re-stating to him: "read the parenting agreement, paragraph #"?)


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 8075 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
crisp
Member
Member # 34236
Default  Posted: 4:50 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

She is frequently right.


Endeavor to persevere. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=csEzTwKemwY

Posts: 409 | Registered: Dec 2011 | From: NE US
homewrecked2011
Member
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 5:38 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

Here is a warning,,, when my XWH couldn't get a rise out of me for requests like you get,,,, then he started NOT picking up kids, NOT attending their stuff, NOT paying for out of pocket extra curricular activities, etc.

It's all their delusional minds at work.
It's funny but recently a neighbor told me the OW is starting to get irritated with my XWH!!!! I think soon this will happen with your XWH and OW.

It's like they are all cut out of the same cloth.

Sorry about what you had to deal with tonight, but you really handled it well.


me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed

Posts: 2206 | Registered: Jan 2012
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 5:48 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

Yeah, I'm laughing about it today.
I still get the shitty physical reaction but...well, it helps when he's such a fucking moron.

I woke up in the middle of the night and thought that I was tired of going down the rabbit hole every time this idiot is an idiot. So, I actually did what ama suggested! I tried to guess what lunacy he was going to send and how many messages he was going to send me.

I figured three.
He sent four.
Here they are...enjoy the stupidity:

What are you talking about? You said I could have him this weekend when I asked if we could switch.

If you check the guidelines you'll see that I get Teslet for Easter weekend. He'll be coming with me to Stripper Whore's family for an Easter egg hunt.

I will take Teslet for memorial day week beginning on May 26th

Sorry, misread the guidelines, you get him this year for Easter. Though, as an atheist, I wouldn't think you would be celebrating the resurrection...

Oooooh burn. You got me there, ex-shat.
And by the way...totally don't get where he read that he gets Teslet for Memorial Day WEEK.

Jeez, did he really think from the first text that I was going to say...Oh yeah, I do remember sending you a mythical text that you could have Teslet this weekend...????

Anyway, at some point I'll send him a text that I'm going to exercise my mother's day weekend visitation with him (takes out one of his weekends) and I'll be sure to clarify his confusion regarding memorial day weekend.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
hellzapoppin
Member
Member # 5655
Default  Posted: 6:02 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

LMAO @ the visual of what a Stripper Whore family Easter egg hunt enTAILS.

Guess we won't get to see any pics of Stripper Whore in her bunny outfit, cause you know she has one.


Him-WH
Me - BW
M 21 years
Divorced by stealth

Posts: 1317 | Registered: Oct 2004
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 6:40 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

hellzapoppin -- she does have a bunny outfit.

I remember after D-day, scouring the internet to find out who this stripper was that he left me for.

I seriously did find photos that she submitted to be a playboy bunny. I am not making this up!!!!


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 8:15 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

I was picturing her fighting with little kids over the eggs she found, hoping that she''d finally get her pony soon.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
Amazonia
Member
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 8:16 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

PS how many points did you get for content?


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13798 | Registered: Jul 2011
tryingagain74
Member
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 10:05 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

tesla, you need to write a book. Your ex and his dumb bunny are proof that truth is stranger than fiction.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3620 | Registered: Oct 2011
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:15 PM, April 17th (Thursday)

I seriously did find photos that she submitted to be a playboy bunny. I am not making this up!!!!

Well, of course she did.

Lordy, tesla. You deserve a medal. Or ten.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25716 | Registered: Aug 2011
Vulcanized
Member
Member # 33523
Default  Posted: 1:42 AM, April 18th (Friday)

I'm chomping at the bit to see the Playboy test run shoot.

Those pix sound like just the ones I'd post on one of those revenge sites. But I'm a meanine ....

Memorial day week? Wow. What a nitwit.


Me: MH 40s; Him: MH 40s (I had RA)
OW: 30s, moron; one of many
M: 8 yrs
3/13: D'd
-----------------------------------------------------------
Everything is as it should be.

Posts: 762 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Vulcania
Abbondad
Member
Member # 37898
Default  Posted: 7:49 AM, April 18th (Friday)

Tesla,

I'm sorry you continue to endure this psycho. I can relate to the physiological reaction when a communique comes in. My heart still pounds a bit when crazy ex sends a text or email.

Sorry, misread the guidelines, you get him this year for Easter. Though, as an atheist, I wouldn't think you would be celebrating the resurrection...

But I did get a chuckle from this, and I hope you are able to as well. Clearly he is rankled and is grasping for any childish retort. I too during my marriage got criticism for being an atheist--as though our ex's are the paragons of religious virtue!!

Hang in there. I know you will. (I always read your posts, BTW.)


Divorced April Fool's Day 2014

Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
-Dune


Posts: 1626 | Registered: Dec 2012
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 5:01 PM, April 18th (Friday)

BTW, my point count: 111.

Oh and did I ever mention that she is moderately to lowly rated on a website where strip club goers rate the dancers? And that she posted on it whining how mean these guys were for talking so much trash about her?
Yep...all part of the weirdness.

I was thinking of starting a blog this summer while Teslet is on his summer visitation about all these weird stories...because really, they are strange.

The incredibly amusing thing about the atheist comment is that he is militantly anti-Christian...which is even more amusing when you also know that he considers himself a Buddhist.

I have no idea what he was trying to accomplish with that comment. I'm sure once he was sober and reread those texts he felt like a fucking idiot...or maybe he figured he better get drunk and high real quick so everything he says sounds fucking brilliant again.

Apparently, crickets to all that shit has moved him to seek legal advice. At least, so says his step-mom.

Bet that consultation was interesting.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
sudra
Member
Member # 30143
Default  Posted: 6:03 PM, April 18th (Friday)

Wait, why would he need legal advice? I thought he was great at being his own lawyer!


Me (BW) (55), Him(SAWH) (58)
Married 22 years, 1 son (19), 1 stepdaughter (27)
DDay #1 January 2004
DDay #2 7-27-2010 7 month EA/PA (became "engaged" to OW before he told me he wanted a divorce)
Working on R

Posts: 1495 | Registered: Nov 2010
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 6:13 PM, April 18th (Friday)

Sudra -- he is a brilliant and amazing litigator. Alas, he is also misunderstood and his brilliance rarely recognized by his peers.

So he must condescend to seek an opinion from someone who is already in the 'good ole boy' network. Because, after all, that is how I screwed him over. It wasn't because he actually did anything wrong...oh no, my friends, my lawyer is an unscrupulous shark that twisted all his good deeds into negligence. And I was a master creator of text messages and lies that I used as evidence to railroad him.

He's just a good, hard working family man, sacrificing his health and youth to be a provider and support two households.

Surely, we can understand why such a formidable man has been reduced to the lowly state of seeking legal advice.

[This message edited by tesla at 6:14 PM, April 18th (Friday)]


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
nowiknow23
Guide
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:54 PM, April 18th (Friday)

Surely.


You can call me NIK

"If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment."
- Carlos Santana


Posts: 25716 | Registered: Aug 2011
gonnabe2016
Member
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 12:04 AM, April 19th (Saturday)

totally don't get where he read that he gets Teslet for Memorial Day WEEK

Oh, ffs. Here we go again.....

all that shit has moved him to seek legal advice

Good. Let him have to actually pay someone to read and interpret his parenting agreement for him so that you don't have to deal with his cluelessness.
He is such a moron.


"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.


Posts: 8075 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
Nature_Girl
Member
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 12:11 AM, April 19th (Saturday)

You ever sometimes wish you could visit an alternate reality, drop a couple hits of acid so this crazy shit all made sense, and just enjoy the rainbows & unicorns 'n hearts for a while? I mean, really, it seems like these people are on a permanent, fantastically awesome trip and we're just the schmucks who get stuck being sober & driving them home.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - I DIVORCED HIM, I'M FREE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y

Posts: 9821 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
sudra
Member
Member # 30143
Default  Posted: 6:08 AM, April 19th (Saturday)

Lol!

Seriously though. You're in better space if he does have a lawyer. Lawyers tend to learn pretty quickly when it's their own client who is the problem and will try to corral them into a more reasonable state wherever possible.


Me (BW) (55), Him(SAWH) (58)
Married 22 years, 1 son (19), 1 stepdaughter (27)
DDay #1 January 2004
DDay #2 7-27-2010 7 month EA/PA (became "engaged" to OW before he told me he wanted a divorce)
Working on R

Posts: 1495 | Registered: Nov 2010
IrishLass518
Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 12:08 PM, April 19th (Saturday)

NO!!! Exshat sought legal advice? But he is soo good in court. What with teaching stripperwhore to use the little door and all.


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
tesla
Member
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 6:40 PM, April 19th (Saturday)

Oh boy.
Ex-shat's step-mom met Teslet and me at a park today. While Teslet is playing on the playground she tells me that ex-shat has finally figured out that he is facing jail time at the next hearing. Guess that lawyer consult was good for something.

He has no money. Well, he does...he recently got his tax refund...but is busy spending it on other things...like a hotel room while he is at stripper-whore's family Easter egg hunt.

And he told his dad that I'm withholding visitation (no big surprise there) BUT what I found interesting is that when he tries to explain the reason for switching weekends, he actually told his dad that he was unable to pick up Teslet a month ago because he had no gas in the car and no money to buy gas.

Whoa.

Anywho, when ex-shat's dad is relating all this bullshit to the step-mom, she says to him, "Well, make sure that ex-shat gets a lawyer and takes Tesla to court over the visitation thing because if she is doing that, that is wrong and he needs to DO something about it."

I love that woman.

He must have figured out that we don't have court on Tuesday, because he texted me today saying that he'd like to have his midweek visitation this Tuesday.

Oh and no job on the horizon. Looks like getting fired from the job for being drunk on the job is having more consequences than he anticipated.

May 2nd just cannot get here fast enough.


"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4683 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Indiana
IrishLass518
Member
Member # 34373
Default  Posted: 11:46 PM, April 19th (Saturday)

Well, that makes sense now because the hotel room for the Easter thing with stripperwhores's family is WAY higher on the priority list than say, paying your obligation to your child and keeping your own ass out of jail so you can sober up and find a job.
((Tesla and Teslet))

I love that the step-mom knows where it's all at though. Good for her for saying what she said. She put it all back on him because if it were true, he could go to court rather than just pissing and moaning about made up shit.


Me: 46 BS Divorced
Him: 45 Married OW
DDay: 07/04/2008
Divorced: 06/15/2011
5 kids: IrishLass 27,IrishLad 25, IrishLass 23, IrishLad 21 and IrishLad 12
"You can't run from trouble..there ain't no place that far"

Posts: 1777 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: WA
Topic Posts: 31