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Divorce/Separation
User Topic: Another step in acceptance...
LeftOutintheCold
Member
Member # 42856
Default  Posted: 7:50 PM, May 2nd (Friday)

I finally went to my doctor yesterday to talk about my anxiety and lack of sleep. I resisted it for quite a while since I felt like it was a sign of weakness to get medical help. However, I have since come to the realization (thanks to SI'ers) that it's just something I need to do to help me heal and function.

As I took my AD's for the first time today, it marks another step in me accepting my reality. I also see it as the first step in reclaiming me and starting the next chapter of my life.

I'm truly looking forward to a night where I can sleep for more than two hours at a time and maybe actually wake up somewhat refreshed. I forget what that feels like. I know the waking nightmare will still be there to greet me, but maybe it won't bother me as much if I can sleep better.

I really feel ready to take back control of my life and start making changes for me!


Me - 42
WH - 40
Dday - 3/6/14
Married 5yrs, together over 10
Status - still separated

Posts: 323 | Registered: Mar 2014
devistatedmom
Member
Member # 24961
Default  Posted: 9:32 PM, May 2nd (Friday)

Sleep helps. Really.

I didn't take any AD's, but did go to my Dr. and get some sleeping pills. I would only take them on non-work nights that I didn't have my kids...but even getting that solid night sleep once every 2 weeks or so did WONDERS to help me clear my brain and be able to think straight again.

It's not a weakness. You are very strong and very right to seek help when you need it. It shows you know who you are, and where you need to be. Good for you.


BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.


Posts: 5373 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Canada
justinpaintoday
Member
Member # 42858
Default  Posted: 9:52 PM, May 2nd (Friday)

Left: so proud of u for tKing cate of urself.


I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2014
dmari
Member
Member # 37215
Default  Posted: 3:13 AM, May 3rd (Saturday)

This is a good and healthy step, LeftOutintheCold! I like how you worded it "...accepting my reality." I recently increased my AD because I felt myself slipping into depression (for me, it looks like inattentiveness and always tired even after a good nights sleep) and I wanted to catch it before I hit bottom. Before, I probably looked at this as a weakness also but know I see it is a strength. I hope that this AD works well for you. It's amazing how much clearer you "see" when you have had a good nights rest. (((((LOitC)))))


Me (BS): 42 Children: DD 18, DS 15
Settled at mediation
Officially divorced ... SOON!

Posts: 2117 | Registered: Oct 2012
Topic Posts: 4