SurvivingInfidelity.com Forums
Divorce/Separation
User Topic: His reaction to being served?
Jesss
Member
Member # 40333
Default  Posted: 10:48 AM, May 10th (Saturday)

My WH just got served yesterday. We live together but he works out of town. He came home last night to babysit the kids for me. And I called the process server to let them know he was in town for only a night, so he was served while I wasn't home.
I was nervous to come home and see him after. When I got home, he would not even look at me or talk to me.
He barely made eye contact with me or spoke to me at all until he left this morning.
I dunno... I almost feel bad..

How did your WH or XWH react to being served? Especially if they're NPD or if you're in-house separated?


Posts: 97 | Registered: Aug 2013
justinpaintoday
Member
Member # 42858
Default  Posted: 11:16 AM, May 10th (Saturday)

Mine knew I had filed and kept asking for it. Was excited to get it and start moving. R not in our cards obviously.


I never realized you could be in this much pain and not be dying.

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2014
one2ndchance
Member
Member # 14759
Default  Posted: 12:41 PM, May 10th (Saturday)

He came home last night to babysit the kids for me.

^^^This is an interesting way of putting it. A parent doesn't "babysit" their own children. Time spent with your children is called "raising them." Also saying "for me" makes it sound like he was doing you a favor.

Jesss....it seems like you view your role as a wife and mother as your responsibility, and it is. But your WH has or had a responsibility also. He has/had a responsibility to be a loyal husband and a nurturing father. Obviously he's failed, but that isn't your fault.

It sounds like he's giving you the silent treatment as punishment for having him served. If he's NPD, this shouldn't surprise you.

I almost feel bad..

How bad do you think he felt when he was trolling for women to cheat on you? Bad enough to stop doing it?


Me: BW 59
Him: STBXWH 61
Married: 25 years
DDay1: 2/2002; DDay2: 6/2012
Gave him his second chance and he blew it.
Divorcing

Posts: 479 | Registered: May 2007 | From: California
PurpleRose
Member
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, May 10th (Saturday)

The doosh and I were in-house S (the first of 2) when I had him served at work. He came home fit to be tied. He was pissed. Ha!

You wanna play with me, you're gonna pay!

I didn't feel bad at all. He cheated with an ugly fat ass whore at work, what did he expect? He sure didn't think I would do it!


divorced the Dooosh
*****************************
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.
~dodinsky

Posts: 3524 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
StillLivin
Member
Member # 40229
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, May 10th (Saturday)

He was pissed. He was righteous.
He called the attorney and tried to keep them from filing in the court. He wanted me to "wait" til he felt like us being divorced.
I had him served at his and Shrek's luurrve nest!
She, I'm sure, was happy about the whole thing!
Don't even try and wrap your head around the ass backwardness of it all. It will make you crazy if you do.


I don't need further confirmation of what a fuckwit he is. I already have plenty, thanks very much. -SBB
D: 7/2/2014

Posts: 2181 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: AZ
Jesss
Member
Member # 40333
Default  Posted: 2:21 PM, May 10th (Saturday)

Justinpaintoday: Mine knew I saw a lawyer, he showed zero signs of wanting to R too. Maybe he just didn't believe Id actually go through with it.

One2ndchance: you're right, reading back, saying he babysat sounds silly. I guess just because he wasn't supposed to be home until next week, but he came home from working 2 hours away just because I had to go somewhere that I couldn't take the kids. I do believe he's NPD, I expected him to be crazy angry... This was a different kind of silent treatment than what I normally get... Like he was maybe sad, or ashamed? Or felt betrayed? I don't know, it wasn't like an angry cruel
Silent treatment like usual.

PurpleRose, Stilllivin: that's the reaction I expected, anger!

Oh well I will just be thankful that he hasn't gotten or acted angry yet.


Posts: 97 | Registered: Aug 2013
sparkysable
Member
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 7:38 AM, May 11th (Sunday)

I had him served at the OW's house you know, the place he wasn't supposed to be, since they weren't having an affair, and were just friends?

He was livid. I could not believe how mad he was. Dude, you are married, and you just got served divorce papers at the OW's house! WTF are YOU so mad about?


D-day OW#1 2/2004; R for 6 years; D-day OW#2 5/2010

Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.


Posts: 3197 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
SBB
Member
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, May 11th (Sunday)

Dude, you are married, and you just got served divorce papers at the OW's house! WTF are YOU so mad about?


Buzz- The word you are searching for is 'Space-Ranger.'
Woody- The word I'm searching for, I can't say, because there are Pre-school toys here.

Posts: 5448 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
Sadmumma
Member
Member # 42192
Default  Posted: 12:28 PM, May 11th (Sunday)

He came home last night to babysit the kids for me

Dads dont babysit. They parent!!! Used to drive me crazy that the moron said this.

Dude, you are married, and you just got served divorce papers at the OW's house! WTF are YOU so mad about?


On any given day you have the power to say "my story is not going to end like this"
Me 41 BS
Him 41 WH
6 kids...7 weeks, 5,7,9,11&13
D day jan 29th 2014

Posts: 533 | Registered: Jan 2014 | From: Land down under
Topic Posts: 9