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Reconciliation
User Topic: contacting of
madnessinmarch
New Member
Member # 42515
Default  Posted: 11:07 PM, July 2nd (Wednesday)

I did reach to gf to let her know how special she was she would travel 4 hours roundtrip to spend time with my bf at least once a week,bf never took her anywhere,spent money on her,wait he did buy condoms to prevent disease and unwanted preg,he would move his truck out of the garage so she could slither in service bf then leave like a drive thru... I have been with bf for 20 +' I told her everything she has done with him he did with me first all the words of love he also told me first. It has taken awhile for me to feel this way but it is true!!! She thinks she is special?? I guess it helps me realize
She really had nothing but a broken man someone who just sat back and waited for arrival promised her nothing



Madness dd March 2013


Posts: 18 | Registered: Feb 2014
tfkeel
Member
Member # 19517
Default  Posted: 7:18 AM, July 3rd (Thursday)

I guess it helps me realize
She really had nothing but a broken man someone who just sat back and waited for arrival promised her nothing

And, conversely, that's what your bf had, too.


Posts: 435 | Registered: May 2008 | From: Pennsylvania
SI Staff
Moderator
Member # 10
Default  Posted: 2:10 PM, July 3rd (Thursday)

Bumping for others to read and respond.

Posts: 10000 | Registered: May 2002
Schadenfreude
Member
Member # 43075
Default  Posted: 2:19 PM, July 3rd (Thursday)

In a way, a way you can't really appreciate, you are lucky. She showed you the type of person she is. Didn't have to take her word for it, she showed you in unmistakeable terms. Its far easier to detach now, without the baggage of marriage, a mortgage and kids. Far easier.

Now, your rule is NO CONTACT. There is no reason to be in touch with her or to respond to her attempts to reach out to you. Its Over with a capital O. No phone, email, text or face to face. No contacts means no new hurts.

The why of it all and more details will not help you. She's the one with her head on crooked. You can't figure them out. They probably can't figure themselves out.

No team goes undefeated. Good teams pick themselves up after a loss and prepare to win the next game. Take that sports analogy and run with it.

And your bf? Well, ever hear the saying "he is dead to me" ? Used by Michael Corleone in Godfather II when describing his future relations with someone who betrayed him. It may be his exW, and he didn't literally have her killed. He just refused to have anything to do with her and slammed the door in her face. Take a lesson from that. Pretend he is in fact already dead. Don't go kick his ass, trash his truck, etc. It isn't worth it. You'll have a few minutes of satisfaction but it won't last.

If you never see or hear from either of them again, you are better off.

Lecture ended.


Posts: 892 | Registered: Apr 2014 | From: Midwest
tushnurse
Member
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 2:20 PM, July 3rd (Thursday)

madness - This is quite profound. While I'm not a big proponent of contacting the OW, I think this is quite awesome.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8433 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
Topic Posts: 5