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Had a great day today. I was somewhat productive regarding job hunting and I didn't cry!

Fast forward to tonight. I take my dog for a walk and I swear that the area in which I live you can't walk your dog without passing like 20 other people walking their dogs. I see a Maltese and my good day ends. Seriously, how the hell can a dog trigger?! It made me sad because it made me think of my maltese that I had to leave behind. It made me miss her. Then it made me think of my two other dogs and two cats and then before I know it I am crying while walking my dog down the street. Thank God it was dark out.

I just want to know when the fuck will that one day come.....just one...in which I do not cry? I am just over it. I try to be strong, if not for me, for my dog because he looks at me with such concern in his eyes and he is so sensitive and I don't want him reading my energy and getting down because of it. Now I am rambling.

I am sure some of you may think "BB, they are dogs. It's not like they were kids", but they were my kids and I loved them and they loved me and it is just not fair that I have to cry every day because of some selfish and insensitive act.

Now I am really rambling.....

I have a dog trigger too.

I get it.

(((bb)))

(((bb)))

That day will come! But until it does, don't try to stifle your tears or your feelings. Let them come out, as you want to move through the grief so you can come out the other side and not be mired in repressed feelings.

I know it's trite, but it does get better!

(((bb)))

Good for you!! Job hunting! that was a huge step for me in my healing. Admitting that I had to take control of that situation and manage it and ... um, not cry about it... YAY FOR YOU! seriously, celebrate girl.

as for your question, yes, there will come a day when you don't cry. It will sneak up on you maybe even two in a row and you will think I didn't cry today!

It is a process and dammit it takes TIME to get better...

((hugs)) you are making progress, I have it on good authority.

Tesla, are you sure you don't mean "kashible"?

Thank you all for commiserating.

My DD cried tonight over the loss of the dog at her mom's. He passed over a year ago. While I don't have personal experience, I have seen many of my friends grieve their pets and I know that they were part of the family.

(((BB)))

I cried about my dogs at the G2G, bitchboots.

They're family. Crying is normal. It's human.

The day will come when you cry once, instead of multiple times.

Then there will be the weeks when you cry a few times, but not quite every day.

Then your IC will tell you "It's ok to schedule a time to cry, like every Saturday at 8 PM." And you do.

It takes time.

Tears are sorrow leaving your body. You have to cry to get it out. If you don't, you bottle it up, and they come out on their own.

You know, TrustedHer, I thought of you when I was walking my boy in the dark, crying like a baby.

I cry more over my pets than I do over people, but I'm not a really emotional person. I had to leave my two dogs and my parrot behind when I moved to TX; I don't cry about them anymore, but I do miss them. I miss my DS too, but I don't cry over him; he can take care of himself.

I cried every day for over six years, sometimes practically all day. I had malignant grief.

I very rarely cry now. Every now and again I get teary eyed for just a moment.

It takes time. A lot of time.

bb--there's nothing wrong with you. They aren't just dogs, they are a treasured part of your family. I lost my two dogs in the divorce because my ex wanted a more complicated custody arrangement for them then he did for our kids. Just another control issue for him. It's been 7 years and I still mourn the loss of those dogs.

Emotions and their expression make us human. There's nothing wrong with that.

I know how you feel. The pets are my kids, too.

My WH always loved the animals but now he's even turning against them. One of my very old dogs died recently and I got a new one against his wishes. Now he is using that as yet another reason not to R. Whatever, so I did something to make my kids and me happy.

If we never manage to R (and it's not looking good!), I can have 55 more dogs if I want. Just cry it out, dry your tears, and make it into a positive.

I do feel your pain, though. Hugs.

I have my kids and I have my pets. I worry just as much about my pets as I do my kids. I call them my furkids.

You will always miss your other furkid, I don't think that ever goes away. But it does get easier to deal with that every present four letter word - time.

Hugs for your hurting heart.

k

My dog is my best buddy and I would be devastated if I had to give her up. In my marital agreement I had the attorney specify that the dog is MINE....and my little cat too!!

I can't imagine how painful this is for you....I'm so sorry!!

Oh Bitchboots. I'm so sorry.

Cry it out. It's ok.

My little dog has been my best companion. I made the huge mistake of letting dumb ass take him as well as the kids on the first overnight visitation he had. I never made that mistake again. I don't know what I would do if something happened to him.

I'm almost crying just thinking about it. He just turned 3 so I hope to have many, many more happy years with his unconditional love.

He is my little man of the house and much better than DA ever was.

Hugs to you and your furry friends.

Lola, that is what I call my boy... my "little man".

What is DA? Divorced Asshole?

[This message edited by bitchboots at 9:04 AM, March 21st (Thursday)]

The golden retriever I had while with the ex was my big guy....

He stuck with me when I was couch surfing as the ex screwed around... when I got moved I of course took him with me... The ex got so upset she abducted him at gun point...

I got him back... Thank god neither me or him got shot...

WB

BB I think you are being unfair to yourself. You are going through a lot. Losing a fur kid in the process too, makes it worse.

I have had 3 of my pets pass this last year, and it has been oh so hard. My dane was suffering from a bad hip, and wasn't a kid anymore (10). My golden was an old man, and his time came (13 with k-9 Lupus). My kitty, age unknown, got sick. It sucks, and it hurts, and I have tears in my eyes right now just typing this. It's ok to be sad over the loss of a loved one.

Here's a thought. My In-laws divorced after my H and I married. They shared custody of their Yorkies. My FIL would get them on the weekends, and for a week or two a year until they were too old. It eased the pain for him. Any thoughts on "sharing custody"?

Good for you, on the job search, and good SI MOJO sent your way!!!

BB, please don't be so hard on yourself. My maltese Tyson passed away 5 years ago and I still grieve his loss. My BIL and Sis had him a lot near the end and when he died, they WAILED. It was like their baby had died.

Pets really do become like family to us. And dogs in particular can really have some very interesting personalities. So take your time and grieve.

BB, there's absolutely nothing wrong with you. You are a loving, sensitive person.

I still mourn my 3 babies who died several years ago. My current babies have been the reason I get up each day. They kiss my tears and curl up with me on the couch while I cry it out. They're my family, my RELIABLE family who didn't abandon me.

Don't feel bad to cry over your Maltese. These emotions sometimes just sneak up on us.

(((BB)))

PS: Right on cue, my little man came running to see why I was teary. Wish some humans could be as intuitive.