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wannabenormal (original poster member #19772) posted at 4:25 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
So this is petty I know...
Yes; I will sometimes check DD's phone. She's 13, doesn't pay the bill and I feel it's okay to make sure all is good in middle school world, kwim? Agree with it or not, I don't want to end up one of these parents that is surprised about whatever their kids are into.
Anyway! 
I saw a text where my DD wished OW a happy birthday recently.
Initially I was like eww, 'the big day' is on DD's mind? Then I stepped back and thought, well - at least my DD is a nice kid, you know?
OWifey thanked DD and mentioned that her DD (same age as mine, 13) hadn't said anything yet...blah blah.
Well, in looking at other texts; XH asked DD to send the text. I know it's silly, but I chuckled.
I know her birthday is like a fucking national holiday to them as a couple (I mean, they like take a trip and it's a biggie apparently) so it made me laugh that it wasn't as big to others and XH had to recruit wishes.
I don't know, I know I sound silly, but ha ha! Y'all ain't the big deal you think you are! LOL!
exhausted lady ( member #30217) posted at 5:45 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
FWIW....you have no reason to apologize for checking your 13 year old daughter's cell phone "stuff". It shows you are a responsible parent. Kids can get into some pretty horrific jams at that age with cell phones.
I am sooo glad cell phones weren't around when my daughter was that age!!!
p.s...I think it's funny that the X has to solicit birthday wishes for the OW. Kinda speaks volumes, ya know?
Sometimes the hardest part of finally seeing through someone is accepting what you see...
God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to
change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
-Reinhold Neibuhr
dreamlife ( member #8142) posted at 5:53 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
Agree...what a pathetic piece of yuck she is.
Your DD has manners & a good heart. 
~XWH told me what I wanted to hear but he always did whatever he wanted to do~
"He called me a bitch.
I called him an ambulance."
Linda H.)
ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 6:01 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
Definitely not petty. You censor other forms of media and decide what is and is not okay for her at every age, right? There could be some R-rated stuff on that phone, and I'm pretty sure she's not old enough to purchase a ticket for those movies yet.
I can put parental controls on my children's computer, but I haven't seen the app that can do that with my son's text messages, so I keep tabs on his phone..
And too funny about her having to wish the OW a happy birthday. This is the kind of thing I would love to tell OW about just to make her feel low, but I'm still in the bitter stage 
wannabenormal (original poster member #19772) posted at 7:50 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
You know what, I don't care what people think if I check DD's phone. I SHOULD. She is 13! And things are so different now; too much info for these kids.
As for OWifey; ha-effing-ha. You reap what you sow. Hope the birthday was a real drag! Granny Tranny!!
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 7:54 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
wannabenormal (original poster member #19772) posted at 8:12 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
Well, no offense to Grans or Trans...but that's my opinion.
I remember telling XH during the split to leave to "go fuck his GT whore!" and he was like, "She's not a whore" in the smallest voice. It was one of my fav memories of the time; it was as if he admitted she was a bit Granny and a bit Tranny, but she was no whore. 
I'm really immature.
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 8:19 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
The transition was perfect. The wording, exquisite.
drag! Granny Tranny
Deliberate or not, really?
Wow!
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
wannabenormal (original poster member #19772) posted at 8:24 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
Intentional; I should've used "..."
Gah, to see that arm of hers in their wedding day photo; it's like a bro hug. *shiver*
5454real ( member #37455) posted at 8:30 AM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
Doubt it.
I'm really immature.
Rather, well played. 
BH 58, WW 49
DS 31(Mine),SD 29,SS 28(Hers),DS 16 Ours, DGS 11, DGD 8, DGS 3
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 13yrs
"I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone."
― Sophocle
Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 5:06 PM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
if you're petty... then so am I. XH has notified the 4 girls (ours) of NW's birthday. He also cc's HER kids, his parents, his sister and NW's brothers.
This has been going on for 10 years.
Some of my kids text her happy birthday.. others don't bother or wait to do a belated.
So silly... I'll join the petty club..
Hugs,
K
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
miadianna ( member #10516) posted at 6:17 PM on Saturday, April 13th, 2013
This has been going on with my kids and they are 26 and almost 24 and hate it. XH will send them a text message to tell them to send OW a birthday card or call her when it's her birthday. It's ridiculous because they have only seen her a handful of times in 8 years and don't have a relationship with her. I don't know if they do it or not and don't ask. Pretty sure they don't.
He also asked them to be FB friends with her kids (another dumb idea because they don't know them.)
Have to laugh about the big holiday for them, that's how it is with XH. He's 54 and throws himself a huge party every year and expects the entire family to come. When we were married he was mad he only got one or two presents from me, said he wanted "a lot" of presents to feel "special." OW texts my kids around his birthday to let them know it's their own dad's birthday.
Me: BS 60Son: 34years oldDaughter: 32 years old Divorced 4/10/08XH passed away 6/24/16
torn2bits ( member #28376) posted at 5:33 AM on Sunday, April 14th, 2013
mia, et.al, this is ridiculous!
Um if you someone needs affirmations from a child that is not even theirs, they have some serious, serious, issues!
Me: 45/WH (SA): 49
M: 26 years 3 kids over 10 yrs old
EA/ PA Dec. 2009 -Divorce halted
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