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WishingForLethe (original poster member #34805) posted at 5:30 PM on Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
i have always had FOO issues, but this is just taking the cake. My parents are set on demonizing my BH just because he wants to D. I understand them wanting to protect and defend me no matter what I have done, but enough is enough. I have told them in NO uncertain terms they are not to ever say ugly things about him- and if the kids ever hear them speak ill of him it is the last time they will see him.
However, the D is proceeding very slowly- we have not even told the kids as BH has been traveling and wants to wait until he can see his IC before talking to them. My parents are getting impatient to the point of picking fights with me over he and I spending time together and furious they don't "have a plan" yet. Why do THEY need a plan- they are not getting divorced.
My mom is chomping at the bit to "mold" me as she says. She has said things like "we are all waiting here for you to come back to us" (as if i am a lost puppy) or "I cant wait to get 30 pounds off you and then I know just how I am going to dress you." And yet she accuses BH of controlling me.
So I have had to withdraw and cut communication with them, which is painful because even though they are crazy, they are all I have. I have no close friends or siblings, and it is hard to emotionally lean on the person divorcing you no matter how friendly you are to each other. I am in IC, but it feels like a long time between weekly appointments.
I know it is sadness talking, but it is hard to imaging my life ever having happiness in it again.
So many of you seem to be coming through this stronger and happier- I don't see that for myself.
Don't look at how far you have to go, but how far you have come
mike7 ( member #38603) posted at 5:34 PM on Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
you will. and you will be happy again. i know this as well as i know my name. you are just going through a bad time right now.
take care of yourself. meditate, take care of your kids. right down 5 things you are thankful for every day.
you will get through this.
BH 60
WW 58
Two grown kids
DDay 1/15/2013
mike7 ( member #38603) posted at 5:40 PM on Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
uh... that would be "write" down 5 things you are grateful for everyday. not "right." (I'm not an idiot, really.)
BH 60
WW 58
Two grown kids
DDay 1/15/2013
Tearsoflove ( member #8271) posted at 8:11 PM on Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
I cant wait to get 30 pounds off you and then I know just how I am going to dress you
Wow. Just wow. You must be feeling so good about yourself after that comment...
"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 9:03 PM on Tuesday, April 16th, 2013
((((Wishing)))) Oh, honey. I know it's hard to do, but stepping back from them is a matter of self-preservation at this point. I'm so sorry they are adding to the stress of the situation rather than supporting you as you need them to.
Tons of hugs. Sending you strength.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
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