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Dude - see those spotlights flashing in the sky - yup there's your signal. But no worries, now you can reply if you are interested and see where it goes. Good luck either way.

Since you work for the same employer, it's possible she'd already heard through the grapevine you were divorced... thus an even bigger green light.

So I've been giving this some thought and I think I'm not ready to date yet. I would love to make some new friends but I don't think she would be looking to be friends. I don't want to give her the wrong impression or lead her on just to boost my ego. I also don't want to be rude either, or just poof. Should I email her back just to sorta "end it"? I hear on here about how frustrating it can be to send out a signal and be left in limbo, so is there an appropriate way to handle this?

I think a polite reply to the email ("no worries, thanks for the help") with no suggestion of additional contact would do the trick. It's polite and would send the message without any hurt feelings or embarrassment.

So I replied back saying that she had nothing to worry about that it was the fastest I''ve been through there, nice talking to you. Now either I sent out a signal without knowing or maybe she is just persistent but she emailed back with "Awwwwwww, i should have made a mistake so you would have stayed longer lol jk jk". I''m dense but even I saw that one. Then she asked how my daughters party went. Also the email back took only 8 minutes.

She is really nice, and I would like to get to know her better. So maybe I could just have coffee with her and see? The fact that I''m broke from my daughters birthday party doesn''t help either. I do get payed next week so maybe just see if she would like to get together next weekend? Is that to far out? Or just email her a bit and see how it fleshes out?

I feel like a fish out of water...

On a second note one of my dance partners kept laughing and was real giggly. I was kinda joking around about my not so stellar footwork but she did ask if I was coming back next week and mentioned maybe I just needed a drink to loosen up. Married dlmos had a panic attack and fainted after that one...

[This message edited by dlmos at 9:15 PM, April 3rd, 2013 (Wednesday)]

Awww...dlmos, this is kinda cute.

But don't ask her out if you feel guilty or because you think you should.

Ask her out if you think you would enjoy her company and you'd like to get to know her better. Otherwise, isn't it nice to know that when you are ready, you've still got it?

Awww...dlmos, this is kinda cute.

Yes, it is! I'm laughing out loud over here at the wonderful opportunities and awkwardness of it all.

Yes, you still feel married I know! But hey, isn't this great practice!?

Ask out the email girl for coffee after work. Agree to the drink after the dance lesson.

Neither date means you're about to propose. It means you are going to have a fun conversation with 2 interesting people. You stay in the driver's seat, be relaxed and don't worry that a first date means you are committing to a long term relationship with either one.

It's just a beverage and laughing!!

Dlmos,

If you aren't nowhere near ready to put yourself out there and date then don't even go any further with "Flirty Girl".

SHE does NOT want to be just friends.

With the way you are being hit on, you need to figure out how to respond to them so you don't find yourself suddenly in a relationship you don't want.

But I do have to admire the fact you are being hit on so often. Must be the pheromones you are putting out.

k9

Just a final little update:

The girl from work is a bit pushy and that puts me off. She had asked how long I had been divorced so I told her I had only been divorced a month. Nothing else just kinda figured that would be enough. She fires back another email a few minutes later saying wow that must be pretty fresh, nothing else so I figure we are on the same page that I'm not interested. But then a couple minutes later she sends me another email with her number just in case I want to "hang out :)". I'm flattered, but just not interested.

I feel good about dating actually, even had one girl catch my eye. But I'm in no rush, just waiting for the right girl to come along Until then I'm just going to enjoy growing and finding myself some more.

It is very flattering though, no clue what I'm doing or saying but it seems to be working for me.

Yes. She does seem a little pushy now you mention it. I think after you told her you had only been divorced for a month that should have been her "clue" you weren't interested.

Anyway we are having fun living through you. . Keep doing whatever you are doing and you will know when the right girl comes along and you are ready.

Keep doing whatever you are doing and you will know when the right girl comes along and you are ready.

And keep posting, cause those of us NOT dating like reading about those who are.

Hugs,

I think the email girl is a bit pushy... I would be put off. The giggly dance partner -maybe a group going out either before or after dance class would be a good 'safe' idea for now.

Hugs,

k

She joked about how many brothers I had in the department and asked if my wife or girlfriend worked there too (this I think was the signal I missed).

Right there with you, bro. I had no idea that sentence was a signal. Wow.

-t2g

And keep posting, cause those of us NOT dating like reading about those who are.

A.Men.

ETA: Gah! Cat on the keyboard = premature submit. Oops.

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 4:34 PM, April 6th (Saturday)]

Married dlmos had a panic attack and fainted after that one...

The first few times I went out after being on the floor for months I seemed to find myself in these 'tricky' situations. My friends reminded me that I was now single so it was kinda going to happen.

Ironic that you're more faithful in S/D than these WSs are during our Ms.

I'm not ready for a relationship yet either but its still nice to know there is interest.

Reading through this I went through all the phases...

"She was totally sending signals!"

then

"Hmm, she was sending a LOT of signals"

and finally

"WAY too many signals. This has drama llama written all over it."

But you have already to come to all of these conclusions, so I'm of zero help.

I'm so glad dancing is going well. Keep looking for yourself in all of this, you're doing great.

[This message edited by Jrazz at 1:07 AM, April 7th (Sunday)]

LOVE Jrazz' post...

Reminds me that it is WAY more productive to work out these situations here PRIOR to taking any action in person....

Just a thought which you seem to have already embraced.

Spot on Jrazz, that was exactly how I felt about it! For those interested I will probably be posting any news in the dating realm, if only to try and figure out what I'm doing. Cause it's obvious I've got a lot to learn

dlmos,

Just have fun with it. You're definitely clear that you are not ready for a relationship, but chatting with someone doesn't necessarily mean that's where its headed. You may get to make amazing friends and just hanging out buddies. I think if you're clear from the get go it won't be too bad. On the upside, you got your sexy back!!! LOL... It wasn't gone, just misplaced so it is rearing its head out.... Enjoy it my friend...