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cds22 ( member #39083) posted at 6:28 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013
OK, I see a little more grey assuming *you* truly want a baby and there are compelling reasons for not waiting a year or two. Really it would be ideal to wait a year or two.
One of my dreams is to have 3 kids an like sri624 I am almost 40, had a miscarriage right at D-day, and am out of time. I am doing a lot of soul searching very quickly right now! Basically, in my view given all the uncertainties of R, I need to be ready to support in my case three children on my own in every way. Financially. Emotionally. I have had a heart to heart with my accountant, am pursuing a raise at my job, have talked with my single mom colleagues who have used au pairs, am trying to buy a very affordable house walking distance to an elementary. I need to be able to provide a high quality, great childhood for my kids primarily on my own (I think I can rely on my H taking them one weekend day per week which I could devote to household work). With alot of resources at my disposal, I am still worried about being emotionally able to provide for three as a full time working single parent.
If you are truly prepared to be a single parent of multiple children, then I think is an option, though I agree with PPs not the ideal one.
DoneWithLove (original poster member #39380) posted at 12:55 AM on Sunday, June 23rd, 2013
We have decided to wait until fall of 2014 to talk about having another baby, that will put us at 1 1/2 - 2 years in R.
BW: Me (24)
FWH: Him (24) Jlaz1988ws
Together 11/12/06
2 sons, ages 5 and 1
Married 9/29/12
EA turned PA with OW/ coworker for 2- 4 weeks
D day 4/20/13
TT 4/20/13 - 7/30/13
"R" 5/3/13
sri624 ( member #33956) posted at 7:12 PM on Monday, June 24th, 2013
hi dwl...i think you are making a good decision. i really do. it will all get a lot worse before it gets better....this whole process sucks...and in a 1 1/2...if he is still that model fwh....and both you and him have done your ic, and mc....and you personally feel good about you and the m after hell and back...then i say go for it.
BS (41):(Former Doormat)
WS (39):(Busted Cheater)
Married: 10 years, 3 kids under 5
DD1: 10/11 PA/EA with pilates instructor/former stripper.
DD2: 10/12 False r, cheating with other women, online dating,Substance abuse issues.
R:Last chance
KeepCalm_CarryOn ( member #33374) posted at 7:13 PM on Monday, June 24th, 2013
I think that's a great decision!! That's when we waiting until and it seems to be going pretty well!
You are not dealing with rational people or situations. Normal thought processes won't work...story of my life.
Me- BW, 30
Him- fWh, 36
Mostly R'd, minus a few scars...bought a house and got a puppy...And baby makes 3! She arrived August 2013
libertyrocks ( member #38924) posted at 7:15 PM on Monday, June 24th, 2013
Thanks goodness! I was thinking about you this weekend. :)
Me-37 Ws-37
2 kids
Dday Nov 2012, TT for a year.
Reconciling for the third time in 4 years.
DoneWithLove (original poster member #39380) posted at 1:22 AM on Tuesday, June 25th, 2013
Thanks for all the support. It was a hard decision because hes wanted another baby for sometime now and I get all sentimental and hormonal... A bad mix. We are waiting for the right time.
BW: Me (24)
FWH: Him (24) Jlaz1988ws
Together 11/12/06
2 sons, ages 5 and 1
Married 9/29/12
EA turned PA with OW/ coworker for 2- 4 weeks
D day 4/20/13
TT 4/20/13 - 7/30/13
"R" 5/3/13
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