SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

WW today was researching our summer vacation. We have a ski trip booked in March.

Told WW you will not give up a fitness for me. WW if you loved me you wouldn't ask me too, I'm not using it for that anymore.

Told WW you will not give up a fitness for me. WW if you loved me you wouldn't ask me too, I'm not using it for that anymore.

Except for last week when she was talking to you on it??? Doesn't that count in her mind? Don't accept the guilt and blame of if you loved me you would be ok with me having boyfriends.....

I'm not using it for that anymore.

That is a lie, Mr. Fake Guy. She is some piece of work, that one.

Did I create this situation by baiting my WW with fake guy?

Please. She is gaslighting you again. She knows how to push your buttons.

You BOTH agreed what she did was unacceptable, she KNEW what the possible consequences were.

If Mr. Fake Guy wouldn't have shown up, Mr. Real Guy would have soon enough.

Your marriage and your relationship pre-dates many years before her MFP account. And now she loves MFP more than she loves you. Really? For her to say that to you, even if it was just manipulation? It just shows where her head is at.

By the way, what if she told you, "If you loved me, you would let me have sex with other men"? You can pull the old "if you loved me, you would let me ... " all day and all night. How about this to you, "If you loved me, you would get rid of that MFP account."

Up until a week ago (?) she wouldn't even let your be her "friend"? Think about that.

Last night she sent me a friend's request on myfitnesspal. I saw it this morning. Too late the damage is done. She has already pick that fitness site over our marriage. The site where see met the men and was having skype sex and relationships with. She would not give it up for me and she would not even add her own husband as a friend. Talk about making someone feel worthless. Yup she is toxic and I'm making the right decision to end this misery.

She was messaging him on "lay low, my husband found out."

I need you great people here to slap me with some 2x4s

If you were one of my brothers, who I love, forget about 2x4s, I'd punch you right in your mouth. And I mean that in the lovingly possible way.

Exercise is a good thing. But BALANCE is needed in life.

Rooting for you today, soulhurt. You've got this.

Told WW you will not give up a fitness for me. WW if you loved me you wouldn't ask me too, I'm not using it for that anymore.

puke!

seriously, please tell me you can see how manipulative that is.

I hope you're doing OK today.

That she is researching summer vacation ideas would piss me the fuck off. That right there is just more proof that she expects you to continue eating the shit sandwich she keeps serving up.

If you start to feel weak, go back and read your posts. She's cruel. She's manipulative. She has devastated you, and refuses to call having Skype sex with many OM cheating. She abandons not only you..but your child..to indulge her selfishness..every.single.night.

She's a horrible person,wife, and mother.

I wish you had blindsided her with the papers. But you want to be nice. I think you're going to eventually realize you can't be nice to her. She takes that as weakness, and uses it as a weapon to inflict more pain.

Simple, tell her it, come off the app or it finished, give her 5 minutes to think, if she need 5 minutes its over anyway!

I wouldn't give her 5 minutes.

If any person with half a brain has to think more than a nanosecond, "Hmm...my marriage or an app", then they are not marriage material. Period.

I agree with confused. I wouldn't have warned her about divorce papers. Read up on hoovering. She's going to suck you in big time. And because you're waffling, she'll break you with it. Be prepared.

soulhurt,

I haven't commented on your threads before, but I have followed your story from the beginning.

I just wanted to wish you the very best of luck on the tough day this will be.

Just know that you are a good-hearted, strong man and that you are doing the right thing for you and for your son.

Wishing you strength.

-W

If I didn't test her with fake guy I wouldn't have filed. That was the last straw...

There's a barn full of hay where that straw came from.

Full speed ahead, soulhurt. The healing really begins when you file. Then you are in control of your life finally.

Good luck today. Stay strong, stay the course.

SH- Stay the course.

Don't warn her. Just have her served. Disappear when she does. Let her sit in it for awhile.

The person you M and fell in love with is not the real her. She wore a mask during your M.

She wants to act single, but be married as you support her domestically, financially, etc.

She wants your support, but not you.

FWIW remember what she told you about getting over it. That is the real her.

I told her this morning and then the constable came with the papers a few hours later.

She has been cycling through rage, yelling, name calling, blame shifting, apologizing, begging, and crying. Rage then begging, yelling then apologizing, name calling then crying. Pretty much all over the map.

She left to go see a friend and I'm going to take a short nap before my son comes home. I need to make dinner and get him ready for soccer practice which there is a parent meeting afterwards.

She was telling me that she loves me and that she was possessed during the sexting from Dec through July. She was addicted to it and couldn't stop. She didn't see that is was hurting me. (bullshit). She said that it was fake internet bullshit and that these guys like her now that she is fit and looks good, but that I loved her when she was in her words, "fat and ugly". That if she got sick and couldn't continue exercising she knows I would still love her and take care of her.

Anyway I just listened and when she asked if I would reconsider I said no. She wants to go back to MC and get IC for herself, get off MFP stop social media. blah blah blah. I told her too late.

Well I didn't sleep much and it has been a stressful day, so I'm going to close my eyes for an hour then I will be busy with my son.

Thanks for all your support. I wouldn't be where I'm at today without y'alls help.

She was possessed back then eh? When did she magically get unpossesssed?

Get that VAR. Keep it on you. Protect yourself. That rage of hers? Could sink you if you aren't careful.

I'm sorry it's come to this. I'm sorry you're hurting.

That was pretty much par for the course on her response. You broke her fantasy bubble and now true consequences are coming down on her.

As for the cycling, it's what people do to manipulate you - they roll through those trying to find the one you respond to. If crying works, they keep on crying. If you fold to her anger, she stays angry.

Your best bet is DETACH. Just say, I'm sorry you feel that way, then walk away.

And the "you would be there for me when I was fat" is just her reinforcing that she was/is a cakeeater - she wanted your stability and love; the OMs' attention.

Stay strong.

Was she possessed just last week, when she told you you were a pussy and to get over it?

Was she possessed just a few weeks ago when she was communicating with fake guy, and lying to you about it?

Possessed ....LOL my ass .

Stay strong you do have a VAR on you, right? Because that's the next step.She's going to accuse you of domestic violence. I can almost promise you that's what's going to happen.

Maybe I'm just dumb but can't she work out without needing an app? I mean, how on earth did anyone get fit before the internet?

In other words, correct me if I'm wrong but you're not asking her to give up "fitness"---as in exercising, working out, being fit---but the app. Right?

But, DF, if she gives up the app, she gives up all the validation she's getting from other men.