Just took a first step in a friendship with the parents of one of DD3's classmates who she really really likes.
The girls only have Tuesdays together, but they have a lot in common and play very well together. The other girl's dad always picks her up, seems about my age, and our girls are the last ones there so we end up chatting. (About the weather, literally)
Before Crazz's A I had pretty good boundaries, but not awesome ones. If I ever veered towards obvious trouble I could turn the car around. Part of this whole journey has involved examining my own behaviors and avoiding slippery slopes.
So these after daycare chats breached ever so slightly into "where do you/your spouse work" and such. I also noticed mountain bikes in his truck and mentioned that Crazz is an avid cyclist. Meanwhile our girls are pretty much begging for a playdate.
Now, if this had been a mom, I would have exchanged #'s weeks ago and that would be that. Because this is a relatively unknown man I have been reticent to do the exchange. I decided that someday soon I was going to leave a note to both parents from Crazz and I inviting them over sometime, and hopefully we could discuss playdates as a group. The thing is, some people look at you weird if you've got TOO much barbed wire up, and I didn't want to come off as a weirdo. So I just keep chewing on it.
Well today the girls were having a grand time and didn't want to go home and we got to talking again. It was almost uncomfortably obvious that the girls would like to play outside of school and neither of us had said anything. Finally - HE said something.
"It would be great if we could get the girls together. My wife would very much like to meet both you and your husband. May I give you her number so we can set something up?"
YES!!! AWESOME!!!
Who knows - maybe they've been through a crisis of infidelity, or maybe he is just coded not to form friendships with other women outside of his marriage. Either way, I was so glad that this first stepping stone with what could be a lifelong friend of DD3's was done in such an appropriate manner.
This even also reminded me that not everybody cheats. Not everybody has bad boundaries. There are good, respectful people out there and I'm excited to make new friends who have the same values we do.
[This message edited by Jrazz at 9:24 PM, May 21st (Tuesday)]
