SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I just have to know what happened. The Ho-Worker and he mostly texted. There were some emails. But all of the texting was captured on the email account.

Since he erased it and the emails have timed out I cannot recover them.

Will I have to supoenea them to recover them? Would I need a court order for that?

Is there someone on these boards that can help me with this issue???

I have no idea about the technical side of this, but assuming they're recoverable, what would you be telling the court to convince them to issue such an order?

I've never heard of a subpoena outside of active discovery in an ongoing trial.

Are you getting D?

No. We are actually in R. I just need to know what happened in my OWN LIFE.

So I was hoping there was some way to retrieve them...Booo

Did he use a home computer to email her? If so,remove the hard drive and send it to someone who can recover info for you.

It's my understanding that yes, you'd need a subpoena to get the information because it won't just be handed over to you, but there'd have to be a legal reason outside just wanting to know, you know? Also, keep in mind that every provider and every ISP have different archiving and retention policies; you never know what would actually be there and for how long.

Sorry.

I have tried everything to get the emails back. I made many calls to Yahoo, emails to support people. I just wrote 10 letters to the top people at Yahoo. Someone called me today from their legal dept. He was very nice, but I was once again told that the emails are gone. I too obsessed over these emails that I so wanted to read. I think they are truly gone.

I can tell you what happened in my case.

1st: If you have a hard drive still, you can download internet evidence finder even if the hard drive has been erased. You'll be able to see emails, yahoo chats, etc.

2nd: I think (but not sure) I think you can only subpoena something if the judge grants you discovery (Which is he grants you the ability to use the subpoena to find info to prove your case.) but, if you don't have a case (like D) then I don't think he will give you D just to find info out.

In my case, my XWH texted OW on his work phone. I filed for D on grounds of adultery. I was granted Discovery. We subpoenaed the phone records for 18months from his work. They had AT&T, so I could only seen times and # texted. IF he had had Verizon, I understand it would have showed me the dialog.

Take it from someone that did everything possible and regained a lot of the conversations... you don't want to read them, you think you do but you don't. The words will be etched in your mind forever and if they are like EVERY other email any BS has recovered they will be extremely juvenille and full of shit.

Let it go, work on healing yourself.

they will be extremely juvenille and full of shit.

I'm probably the odd man out on this one, but this is exactly why I needed to read them. WH and his moron coverup accomplice missed only three of the thousands of sex emails that he exchanged over the years-and none of them were written by him. The most disturbing part of the 3 sex emails, to me, was how utterly idiotic they were. I thought my H was fairly intellectual-but, after reading those, after reading the kind of stupid crap that he threw his family away for, I will never see him in the same light again.

Now, the other emails and messages, the ones that he wrote to EVERYONE (that did not know me) , those I also am glad I saw, because I finally saw clearly what kind of monster I was dealing with. In my case, he made up lies and lies and lies about me to whomever would listen to make himself look like some kind of victim (whether he was either trying to get sex from them or some kind of pity for himself to boost his ego-this behavior was commonplace in his household growing up-the mom would go to one of the kids and make up stories about how daddy was being mean to her, etc).

I hate that he wrote these things, but I am VERY glad that I saw them. I needed to know that these lies about me were being distributed. Now, the only problem is that I have no idea who all he distributed these lies to (there were thousands because he also posted lies on global dating sites about how awful his wife was to him, etc). I have to wonder if anyone I meet has some version of what an awful shrew of a wife I am-or whatever he chose to lie to them about me.

But again, I would rather know than not know. Just me.

@ Why2008~

I know that I am opening a pandora's box, but I just have to know the extent of the betrayal. I know it is in the past and we are on the road to R'ing....but I just have to know.

It is/was my life too.

I am looking into internet evidence finder. I sent them an email asking if they think their software will work with my particular hardware.

I will keep you all posted!

Why don't you just take the computer to a computer forensic person? It is expensive, but if you really want the info, do that.

Hey K9,

I am going to a computer forensics guy today!

I did not want to be sneaking around, so I told Mr. Happy today.

He helped me get the device unhooked so that I could take it in for the free diagnostic exam.

Let's see what I can come up with.

I just have to know.

And we are doing so well right now, I know it will set me back...but no more than not knowing for 2 years has.

I am hoping that I will find what he has been telling me.

Fingers crossed...

whoops double post

[This message edited by Getting to Happy at 3:13 PM, June 19th (Wednesday)]

I found out that WH told LTA married howorker mother of two small children that he never believed in destiny until he met her. We had been together since we were 17. Firsts and onlies. Together for 29 years when he wrote this to her. There are some things you don't want to read.

That and the time he texted his f***buddy that he wanted to wear her lingerie. Images I could do without.

If you're satisfied you have enough truth then these details just hurt. For me I didn't know about these women until I found these so I'm glad I looked.

Please let me know what the forensics person said/did.

Okay so I took in a Time Capsule in for Data Recovery. I was going after the emails and texts that Mr. Happy had so cowardly erased to save his ass...If your have the Time Capsule has the power on it records every day with what ever computer is linked in to it via wifi. You can never erase it . You would have to destroy the drive or reformat it in order to get rid of the data. But... once you get to capacity (this one is 1 Terra Byte) it will over-write itself, so what ever are the oldest files/days they will dissapear forever...HUMMM

I know that it was overwritten for about a month until we just turned it off and bought a new one. Lucky for Mr. Happy. He tried to erase some of the the more damming info but he did not get all of it. There was too much of it.

He also did not count on my tenacity...

I was able to look at Palm emails and texts through 'console' on the MAC in the system folder. It will open any document, you may get gibberish but you will be able to open it. Lucky for me there was gibberish and then full convos. Too Bad for Mr. Happy.

I will post about this in General.

Just know that you can retrieve some info from this kind device. And if it does not over-write itself, you can retrieve it all!

I understand your need to know-I was the same

I got his and her phone recs with a subpoena - even though they were invaluable for other reasons, the content was not available (sprint)

I know Trumanshow.

I am not so tech savvy but I will not give up. It took me months and months to find shreds of evidence.

Very Damming Evidence.

What I found hurt me to my core but it verifies what I was saying all along, There. Was. More. To. The. Story.

I am reeling from the TT. And having to become a major sleuth to get it is not helping his cause.

Why can't the WS just be honest and come clean??

It just goes back to the WS coping skills. Lying and minimizing have worked for him for years, why change now??