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Any tips on getting through an affair with a best friend?

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January24 posted 5/6/2013 13:44 PM

I am brand new to this site but need help with mind movies and memories? Even with setting up the site.I found out 1/24/13 that my husband of 10 years was having an EA and PA with my BFF. We have been to MC and IC. The thoughts are still running high. I do have my good and bad days, but that is in comparison to the early weeks. It still crosses my mind 95 % of the day at least. Many days I find it hard to act normal, but some how do. I journal. But how could they. I haven't contacted her except the day I found out, but at that time it was "only text messaging" like 2400 in a month. Now I know all of it through him and emails, I think. Many lies before now, so how do I know it is really all out. I don't but at some point I have to. He says he wants to stay and work on our marriage. I hope that is true. Is there anyone out there with the double betrayal that can help me?

Tred posted 5/6/2013 13:51 PM


Sorry you are here, but I'm glad you found this site. There is a whole section devoted to Double Betrayals under the "I Can Relate (ICR)" topics - the current conversations are at the top on page two if you look under ICR. There are plenty of people here that have dealt with or are dealing with this issue.

January24 posted 5/6/2013 15:01 PM

I'm sorry but I have spent an hour trying to figure out where to go to post on Double Betrayal. I appreciate you telling me where to go and I did find it, but can you help me learn to post. Hope you are still there.

lieshurt posted 5/6/2013 15:07 PM

When you are in a topic, you should be able to see the "Post Reply" option at the top, right of your screen. Click on it and then it gives you a box to type in and post.

[This message edited by lieshurt at 3:09 PM, May 6th (Monday)]

January24 posted 5/6/2013 15:21 PM

ok. so maybe I am dumb, all I have is print topic. Am I missing something? is this a sign too?

lieshurt posted 5/6/2013 15:25 PM

You can also go to page 49, scroll to the bottom, right and you'll see a "Post reply to this topic" option there.

aesir posted 5/6/2013 16:08 PM

You would post to any topic the same way you posted follow ups on this one.

To find the double betrayal thread, go to the main page by clicking on forums, then click on the I Can Relate Forum, then click on the double betrayal thread.

LadyYoga posted 5/6/2013 16:15 PM

I just private messaged you.

Sadden in OK posted 5/6/2013 16:51 PM

My wh had two affair during our marriage but the one that hurt the most was with my BFF. I would tell her all my fears and needed her help in finding out. Well I guess that made me the fool. She would use it to get closer to him. I still don't have many girl friends because of this but it does get better. This site has been a blessing to me and many others.

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