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User Topic: What is your precept?
♀ 15334
Member # 15334
Default  Posted: 9:04 PM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

To borrow from R.J. Palacio’s book, “Wonder”:

A Precept is a “rule about really important things.”

“In a nutshell, precepts are words to live by. You can find a precept in a book you’re reading, in a song you’ve heard, or in a fortune cookie. It doesn’t matter where, but if a phrase rings true to you, and it can help guide you in making a decision, then make it your own personal precept.”

My Favorite:

“If you have the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind.” - Dr. Wayne Dyer

Ask yourself these questions:

· Do you like the precept?

· Would it apply to how you live your life?

· What would the world be like if everyone followed this precept?

· Would it end wars? World Hunger?

· How hard it would be for you to choose to back down from an argument with your mom or dad or brothers or sisters, if you knew you were right and the other person was wrong?

· Would you give in just to let the other person save face?

It’s not so simple a thing to choose to be kind. It’s one thing to back down from an argument with someone you love, or a friend, because you don’t see the point in “winning” the argument at the cost of your friend’s feelings.

But what if you believe in something that no one else believes in? What if you’re the only one who knows you’re right? Should you back down, just to be kind?

What if you were Galileo, and you knew you were right about the planets revolving around the sun even though the rest of the world thought you were crazy—would you back down?

What if you were living in the 1950s and you were the only one in your town to believe that black people should have the same rights as white people—would you back down, just to be polite?

What if you were standing up for something you believed in—would you really want to back down, just for the sake of kindness?

Maybe the most important word in the precept isn’t the word “kind” or the word “right.” Maybe the most important word in that whole sentence is the word “choose.”

As with all things in life, every choice you make needs to be weighed. Every decision needs to be evaluated. All that precept is telling you, is that it’s better to choose to be kind than to choose to be right. But the real point is that you have the choice.

So this is meant to be a fun kind of thought provoker, and to motivate you to find your own precept. It may help you with your tagline as well -- and that contest floating around here if you find one with "brownnoser" in it.

[This message edited by BrokenRoad at 9:05 PM, June 15th (Saturday)]

{Him}FBH - 45 (WifeHad5)
{Me} FWW - 46
2 kids: 10 & 15
Reconciled :)
*Learning is a gift. Even when pain is your teacher.*

Posts: 12019 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Midwest
♂ 17210
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 10:42 PM, June 15th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think you can being kind is just how you choose to go about being right. If you are right and instead you choose to back down to be conflict avoidant, then you are choosing to be both wrong and unkind, as you are also depriving them of what is right.

Here is my entry:
When faced with a choice, before committing, always ask yourself "Would I have to lie about this?"

Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.

Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 6:08 AM, June 16th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine always has been and always will be:

Live and let live.

If I'm right, and the situation really matters to me, I won't back down.

You are important and you matter. Your feelings matter. Your voice matters. Your story matters. Your life matters. Always.

Me: FBS (no longer betrayed nor a spouse)-62
Him: WXH-62
D-day: 2007 (two years before finding SI)
S: 6/2010; D: 3/2011

Posts: 25302 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Arizona
♀ 9344
Member # 9344
Default  Posted: 6:17 AM, June 16th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

"Integrity is never painless." - M. Scott Peck.

I love yours, BR.

She packed up her potential and all she had learned and headed out to change a few things.

Posts: 7763 | Registered: Jan 2006 | From: Poolside
♀ 16024
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:52 AM, June 16th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine is live in truth.

I realized through this journey that I spent a lot of years stifling things, feeling sad about things, and not being true to myself or others to keep peace and to avoid dealing with uncomfortable and painful stuff.

I only want real relationships now, which meant confronting people with my truth and ending the relationship if it didn't work anymore. I have less people in my life now, but the relationships I have are real. I also feel lighter, and I am more comfortable with myself and more comfortable in the relationships that I do have.

Living in truth also means speaking up when I need to as things happen, even if it means an uncomfortable conversation.

The precept Be kinder than necessary has been another one for me. Life just feels better when living kindly. And I feel it coming back to me...the good energy...which is an added bonus.

"If you want to know who your tribe is, speak your truth, then see who sticks around. Those are the people who get a spot in your blanket fort." -Nanea Hoffman

Posts: 55117 | Registered: Sep 2007
♂ 33699
Member # 33699
Default  Posted: 6:56 AM, June 16th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

More and more I am thinking: Is this the hill I want to die on?

It's taken a long time to finally learn to pick my battles and realize that being right is not the most important thing in the universe. I still dig my heals in at times, but with a little more forethought.

Great thread BR!!

"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indominable will" - Mahatma Gandi

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - Aubrie

Posts: 3987 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: Georgia
♂ 36622
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 9:14 AM, June 16th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The full fruit of a labor of love lives in the harvest. And that always comes in its right season.

BS 42
fWS 38 (SurprisinglyOkay)
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2859 | Registered: Aug 2012
♂ 3031
Member # 3031
Default  Posted: 9:57 AM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Faber est suae quisque fortunae - Every man is the artisan of his own fortune. Appius Claudius Caecus

Today of course it would be interpreted 'each person is the architect of their own happiness.'

This precept displaces a 'victim mentality' and places the responsibility for happiness where it truly lies - in the mirror.

"In a time of deceit, telling the Truth is a revolutionary act."

Posts: 22740 | Registered: Dec 2003 | From: Hell and back, way back :o)
♀ 15300
Member # 15300
Default  Posted: 10:46 AM, June 17th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think mine should be Live your life so that on your deathbed, you won't need to say "I wish I had done (insert activity)."

Age: 64..ummmmmmm,, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks

Posts: 8747 | Registered: Jul 2007 | From: Toronto, Canada
Topic Posts: 9

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