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My dad died.

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ladyvorkosigan posted 7/27/2013 02:51 AM

He's the last parent I had.

I need advice. I need it so bad I don't known what advice I need, even.

timeforchange posted 7/27/2013 03:32 AM

I am so sorry to hear of your huge loss.

I don't know what advice to offer.....

Grief is a path and journey. A long hard one. You can only take it one step at a time.

Hugs to you tonight .....

aesir posted 7/27/2013 03:51 AM

I don't think there really is any advice possible, at least none that is helpful.

ETA: After some time to think on this, I still have no advice. I find that even 15 years later, the loss of my father is still painful, and I wouldn't change that. Every painful thought reminds me of what I was fortunate to have in the first place.

[This message edited by aesir at 7:45 AM, July 27th (Saturday)]

Tearsoflove posted 7/27/2013 04:41 AM

So very sorry for your loss.

painpaingoaway posted 7/27/2013 04:57 AM

I'm so sorry Lady V.

Even though I had my own family, and my sibs, when both Mom and Dad were gone, I felt so alone in the world.

Do you have siblings? Or are you an only child?

We are here for you.

((((Lady V))))

Nature_Girl posted 7/27/2013 05:24 AM

Oh, I'm so so sorry! ((((HUGS))))

Do you have people who can come to you IRL and walk with you through this?

JanetS posted 7/27/2013 05:45 AM

I'm so sorry to hear that. I've lost both of my parents too, I have a brother and that helps. Do you have a sibling? This is a time when you can bond with them if you are not close. In my case that is what happened.

Lean on friends....esp. if you have friends who knew your Dad.

I understand that "lost" feeling. I believe he is watching over you...and he's with your mother now.

Time will make it easier. You will always miss him.

authenticnow posted 7/27/2013 05:57 AM

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I have no advice, just hugs (((((LadyV))))).

hurting2much posted 7/27/2013 06:01 AM

((((ladyV))). I am so sorry

cass posted 7/27/2013 06:13 AM

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Do you have other family members/close friends who can help you through this very difficult time?


UKgirl posted 7/27/2013 06:18 AM

LadyV, Iím so sorry. My Dad died just before Christmas 2011 and my Mum died the day after her birthday on 22nd May this year, 9wks ago. My Godmother died 3wks ago and the funeral was Thursday just gone. It was the shock of my Mum dying.

I think one of the hardest things (apart from having to deal with all the personal effects) is not being able to just pick up the phone and give them a call. My Dad was full of sound, sage advice and my Mum able to give me help with why my jam wonít set.

I feel for you. Itís a very sad time. You donít need advice, you need someone to give you lots of hugs and understanding. Wrap yourself in the love your Dad had for you and know the memories will always be there. Hugs.

Too_Trusting posted 7/27/2013 06:27 AM

Oh ladyv,

I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I lost my father in 1998, and my mother this year on Mother's Day. Losing your last parent is quite unsettling. It's like I don't know how to "be" without a parent.

My thoughts and prayers are with you. Huge hugs.

Holly-Isis posted 7/27/2013 06:33 AM


I'm so sorry for your loss.

cmego posted 7/27/2013 06:44 AM

One step at a time. My Dad died 6 years ago and it still takes my breath away.


whyohwhyohwhy posted 7/27/2013 07:10 AM

So sorry for your loss.

gahurts posted 7/27/2013 07:13 AM

(((((((Lady V)))))))

Sorry for your loss

hurtbs posted 7/27/2013 07:36 AM

Big hugs


I have no advice. Just compassion.

Deeply Scared posted 7/27/2013 07:39 AM


I'm so sorry, I completely understand...I lost both my parents too..

I'm too young to go through the rest of my life not hearing their voices

I need advice. I need it so bad I don't known what advice I need, even.

It's especially hard when exciting things (good or bad) are happening in my life...I don't have either of them to pick up the phone and tell. So, I make sure to 'talk' to them on a daily basis. I keep their memories very much alive in my heart and mind. It also helps that MH loved my mother very much (my dad died in '82) so he has wonderful memories and stories of her as well.

Again, I'm really sorry for your loss.

MovingUpward posted 7/27/2013 08:05 AM

I'm sorry for your loss LadyV

MrsDoubtfire posted 7/27/2013 08:05 AM

((( ladyv)))

I cannot offer advice as I've only lost one parent so don't know what it feels like to lose both.

All I can say (from personal grief when I lost my dad ) is to cry and don't bottle your emotions up and find someone with big shoulders who can just hug you and be a strong presence for you -both now and in the future.

I am so sorry that you have to grieve for someone once more.
(((Huge hugs)))

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