Bailey, you received two absolutely great posts.
Your life is changing and will be changed permanently. This is not something you can just get over, it is a road that must be traveled all the way. Embrace the journey of grief and don't try to take shortcuts with it. This will be a 2-5 year road with or without him.
#1, You have to get to the truth. He needs to put everything in to a written timeline and give it to you. Full disclosure is what's needed to be able to ever begin trusting again.
The truth is often the hardest thing to reach because most cheaters don't come clean but trickle the truth out over weeks and months. Others blame their spouses, lie etc... You must remain strong and not allow him to push off the truth. Trust your gut. If you have to take him to a lie detector test, do it to get the truth. Your gut is the best though, you know just sexting is not the likely thing especially if he's talking to men and women. He likely has a porn habit with this too.
You absolutely need to eat, drink and sleep properly. No shortcuts. If you need herbal tea or even your Dr approved OTC sleep aid, you need to sleep. If that means not sleeping together, not discussing certain topics before bed, not watching certain movies, shows, not eating just before bed, do what you need to do for proper sleep.
Get into a physical exercise... you need to work out these emotions and his face is not always the best way to do it! ;-)
Focus on your child. That child needs you to be together and love them.
Understand that NONE of this is your fault. Every relationship has marriage issues and that give NO EXCUSE for infidelity. Don't accept his blame for that if he does.
Record any admission of guilt on his behalf and save the evidence where he cannot get to it.
There will be short periods that you think you can trust him... till he's come completely clean and is well on the way to recovery, you cannot trust him. You must hide your evidence and not ever tell him how you got it or where it is. He lost that trust and must regain it.
Once you believe he's come clean, you need to work on rebuilding trust. Lost trust cannot be regained, it can only be rebuilt.
He needs to change his phone number, email address and if he's all over social media with other people, should consider shutting it down. If you don't want him to do that, then consider blocking all the OMs he's had conversation with.
If he's reaching out to other men and women, I'd really consider getting STD tests. The gay community believe it or not contains the bulk of ALL STDs.
It is not your fault that he's reaching out to other men. He needs help and counseling. If I were you, I'd try to find a good very successful faith based counselor who can do both IC and MC. Reason is that many mainstream counselors will not tell him that his "desires" are wrong and may even encourage him to explore those feelings. No married man should be exploring other feelings and should know that it is wrong to do so. If he wants that, he should divorce. Having the same counselor will also help keep you both on track and know when something is amiss ie lying to himself or the counselor or you.
Be careful about psychiatrists. Unless you have a history of mental disorders or are having very serious thoughts of harming yourself or others, you should not take any mind altering drugs to "help" you through it. They have life long effects.
You can make it through this, many others have.
I chose to stay with my wife and keep that in mind with this advice...
See an attorney. You need to know what your options are.. not just to leave him but also financially, custody wise etc... Do you want another daddy with your husband raising your child? It sounds extremed but understanding the law and what options you have will give you strength to offer the gift of reconciliation if you so choose.
