Minor child had weekend with xwh. One of those days, xwh decides to help oldest child with getting a new sofa to the apartment; minor child (mid teens) doesn't want to go, so xwh allows minor child to stay home alone - while he goes over an hour away!! Minor child does not drive and xwh does not have any family nearby; the friends he has now are no friends to the child, and child does not know most at all. Xwh also did not give me any kind of heads up he would be so far away with minor child at home alone, though, if I am home, I am not but a mile away.
(Not the real point of this post, but..... Am I just over-protective here? I never let the [non-driving] child stay home alone if I am going to be that far away, unless I have someone that will be within about 30 minutes away ready to be on-call, should there be something urgent/emergency happen, and minor child is told that is the person to contact.)
While xwh is away, with minor child at home alone, xwh's house alarm sounds, which, of course, freaks out the child - runs to room, locks door, grabs cell, texts xwh about situation and how child was NOT the one to set off the alarm. (Child should have called 911 instead, so we gotta work on that one....) Xwh calls child, saying he told monitoring firm to send cops, etc, and then, get this: xwh ASKS child if child wants him to come home!!!!
?????????????????????????????????!?!??!??!? SAY WHAT?!??!??!???!???????????????????????????????
First, xwh is over an hour away - so what the heck?? If there is an intruder who intends to harm my child, my child is dead/gone well before xwh is even a quarter of the way home. (Hence my protectiveness about not being so far from said child in the first place....) Second, what the heck is he doing asking??????!!!???? The very first moment I understood my child was home alone with the alarm sounding that child says child did NOT set off, I am already in my car to come home BEFORE the monitoring people are sending the cops!!! I wouldn't be ASKING the child about coming back - I'd be TELLING the child I am on my way!!!!!!! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In the end, it was discovered that xwh had stupidly left the motion sensor on, so child had indeed set the alarm off. (Child was not aware xwh's system had motion sensors at all, so would not have guessed this.) Cops were contacted and told not to come after all, and child was fine, though frazzled.... But it amazes me the thinking, or rather the lack of thinking xwh has in terms of caring for another human being here, one that is dependent on him to do so in the right way. (I don't mean the part of leaving the motion sensor on - though that was stupid it could have been a mistake anyone could make; I mean especially the part about asking if he should come home.....) Sigh.
Just more evidence on how I was the one that did all the child-rearing/caring while xwh still has no clue....
ETA: Yes, I do give xwh some credit for having set the alarm at all - it actually surprises me he did do that much, though, and it would not surprise me if he did so only because child had been the one to prompt him to do so..... Not often, but sometimes, xwh manages to do this top-level type stuff, such as set the alarm, but it is the follow-through or handling the aftermath/crisis where he fails royally.....every single time.....
[This message edited by Wiserallthetime at 11:58 AM, March 28th (Wednesday)]