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Impacted posted 11/4/2019 19:09 PM

It has been a very long time since I have posted here.
Lurked on and off........but find sometime things here set me off.
Unfortunately I canít say all is well in my world.
I am tired of my gut saying something still has not been
disclosed. So after a couple years I need to do only thing left and that is get him to take polygraph. I am in Canada.
How do we know who we should use? How long are they?
Do you think worth it? Thanks.

Hallmack posted 11/4/2019 19:25 PM

Do it. They will lie until they canít anymore.

Marie2792 posted 11/4/2019 21:30 PM

There is a registry here in the states that lists examiners by region. I selected a few from that list and emailed them some questions. I went with the one I felt answered me appropriately. He came to my home and it took about 90 minutes. The cost was around $490 and it was worth it to me. Our MC advised against it but itís my marriage and I decide what happens in it. Gave me peace of mind and Iíd do it again if I had to do it over.

Impacted posted 11/5/2019 09:19 AM

Thanks Marie and Hallmark. Marie2792 did you learn anything from it? Did you believe what it said?

Mr. Kite posted 11/5/2019 11:25 AM

I'm going through the process of setting up a polygraph for WW. Do a Google search and find out everything you can about the process. Read articles, watch videos, etc. Find examiners in your area. Read reviews about them. Then for the final step, interview them.

You will find that some believe a polygraph will help you find out the truth, while others claim they are too flawed. Go with your gut. Hope you find out what you need to know.

TX1995 posted 11/5/2019 11:32 AM

We got the name of the polygrapher from our MC. It took a couple of hours. He talked to me, talked to WH, did the test, then came and talked to me again. I felt like it was helpful to my peace of mind.

If you have a MC or IC, I'd start there. If not, I actually just listened to a podcast on polygraphs. The polygrapher solely concentrates on sex addicts. He's actually in Canada. (Not that I know where you are.) I don't think I can share specific links, but it was an APSATS podcast (which I can't stand usually bc the sound is terrible) and you might be able to find info online.

I'm sorry you are having a difficult time right now. I hope you can find a little peace.

steadychevy posted 11/5/2019 12:55 PM

Impacted, I had my WW do a polygraph. I believe they are a useful tool but definitely not the only one. I believe they can be useful to gather information with which to use in making decisions along with other info.

I live a couple of hours north of Edmonton. I found out about this polygraph examiner through a referral from a lady that I attended a BAN (Beyond Affairs Network) group with. I looked him up on the internet and did a little investigation.

I was able to ask 3 or 4 questions. I took 10 or 12 questions in with me which we boiled down to 4 through discussions with him. My WW was in the meeting room all the time. It's very important for the WS to understand all of the definitions. Things like a blowjob is physical adultery as is a kiss.

The examiner would leave the meeting room to re write the questions and come back and discuss them again. His assistant stayed in the room with us. She would lead a discussion and said some things that irritated my WW. I think that was her intention. There was a large mirror in the end wall to the left of my WW and I. I think the examiner could have been watching reactions through a two way mirror. I didn't think of that until much later.

After the questions were finalized I was asked to leave the building entirely, not just the office, for an hour and a half. My WW was lead to the examination room which was devoid of sound or visual stimulus. The electrodes (or whatever they are) were hooked up to her to record the reactions.

The questions were asked in a very low key, slow monotone by the examiner. Everything was done for the environment to be stimulus free. I know there are some (above, for one) where the examiner came to the house. I'm not sure that environment would be conducive to the examination based on my experience.

I came back to the office at the appointed time and had to wait a while for my WW to come out into the waiting room. I got a verbal report a day later and a written hardcopy report in the mail later.

I believe it was very worth it. My cost was $575 plus GST. I think the total time was probably close to 2 1/2 hours at the office. I found the examiner I used by referral. He had a lot of experience and his website showed the kinds of examinations he had done and for how long. There was a BBB, too.

Good luck and I'm sorry things aren't going well for you.

cocoplus5nuts posted 11/5/2019 21:16 PM

I just googled polygraphers in my area. I got a full confession the night before after 6 months of absolute denials. He passed the poly.

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