SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

WS has been very forthcoming in the last week. I really appreciate this, however, I am *very* angry about some of what's coming out. So, if he's willing to answer anything, and I ask questions, how do I handle the emotions that come from the answers? I don't want to punish him for answering, you know? I'm not sure how to handle some of this information.

You can decide that you don't need answers or not right now. Though everytime information comes out, that's just more you have to deal with.

Or you can accept the truth for what it is and figure you'll just work through your pain, anger, and disappointment. Some people decide they don't need "details".

For me, even when I get angry at the answers, I make sure that I always come back and thank him for answering, no matter how painful the answers. I sometimes also just walk away from him for a time after the answers so I can be angry and process in private, in an effort to make it safe for him to answer me.

What works for me: saying thank you for the truth. saying "i can't talk about this anymore right now" when the emotions are too overwhelming. Taking responsibility for my own emotions by processing them through journaling or with my IC BEFORE I try to discuss further with FWH. I agree with you -- with a guy who's really trying, punishing him with my own rage for giving me what I asked for is counterproductive. Best of luck to you!