SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

So I seemed to be getting my life back on track, been in IC for a few months now, have rules in place to prevent me from cheating again, or prevent me from getting in a situation where I could possibly cheat, and it's been working well. Been going out with girl friends, have not been alone with a man except the ex for a while, and won't do that again.

So last night, XBF did some research and found pics of me taken during the last swing party I attended. I didn't tell him about them because I didn't know they were taken. Had no idea. Not sure what they are, he won't send them to me because he's going to destroy them. But since he found them, he has gone back to the first DDay....back to square one. We're not together, but in his mind, he's back to when I first told him about everything. I hate that my past keeps resurfacing..I hate what I did, hate that I did those things, hate myself for hurting him and my XBH so much....does it end at all?? I realize that in the minds of those who have been cheated on the A doesn't ever go away, but this is crazy!!! I hate this!! I wish I could take the time back. SO much progress has been made between November and now, and now this. Ugh...so angry/mad/sad at this point!!! What can I do to get back to the good feelings I had, to go back to feeling any sense of self worth?? I am not sure I can do anything more to XBF than I have in the past to get past this, but what can I do about this??

Hatingit, I wish I knew what to tell you but I'm no saint myself. I can tell you to try to be strong and keep doing what you've been doing to keep yourself out of trouble. Don't self medicate or try to fix your pain by cheating again. Stay busy, keep posting and if you want to pm you can.

I know stopping the behavior is hard. I am in IC too and it's painful. Don't be too hard on yourself.....