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lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 2:52 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
My wife and I are knee deep in her affair season. These dates arent front and center this year. I feel its progress. We are busy with family, spending time supporting each other. It feels different this affair season. The scar is still scabbed but I am definately not bleedig anymore. My wife is engaged in family and still working with her IC despite a crazy work life right now. Progress.... Affair season begone!
BS- Me (45)D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10). Currently in R.Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
numb&dumb ( member #28542) posted at 2:56 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
Like I have said before it is powerful to know that this can get better.
I am not in affair season myself (yet anyway), but definitely on the downward swing. I am processing a lot right now that I had pushed away.
I know it gets better and that keeps me going most days.
Dday 8/31/11. EA/PA. Lied to for 3 years.
Bring it, life. I am ready for you.
why2008 ( member #18378) posted at 3:56 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
Progress.... Affair season begone!
The further out you get, the less the time of the year will remind you of the affair!
Congrats on the progress you have both made!
Me - BS - 46
Him - WS - 44
Two daughters / 10 and 7
phoenix54 ( member #36574) posted at 4:12 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
One year anniversary is coming up this Saturday, May 4th.
It is very much in my consciousness right now.
My WW recently restarted IC but she does not seem committed to going.
We are still in MC. I really don't know where this is going to lead.
What are the chances she'll actually remember that d-day is coming up? I'm not optimistic.
LHAP:
I wish you and your wife all the best. You have provided great insight and support during my time here on SI. Congratulations on your progress.
BH: 47 (me)
WW: 45
11 month PA/EA
4 children
D-day: 5/4/12
Married: 20 years
Reconciled
lordhasaplan? (original poster member #30079) posted at 5:31 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
Numb,
It does.. If you do the work together and peel the onion one layer at a time it does. I would say were now about ready for a rebuilding process, the fire is out, we cleared out the old rubble and time to really start a rebulding process.
Congrats on the progress you have both made!
thanks WHY! and Phoenix!
BS- Me (45)D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10). Currently in R.Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.
Knowing ( member #37044) posted at 9:21 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
Yup, A season here, started with Easter (ugh) and everything is coming back to me. I finally decided to finish a project I never completed: putting family pictures on the wall. I started with last years' pics. 
I can see that it will get easier, this first time around is awful, though!
BW, R last 4 years of marriage out of 15... FINALLY, HAPPILY DIVORCING!
We are in R.
catlover50 ( member #37154) posted at 9:55 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
Way to go LHAP!!
So I guess the advantage of an LTA is ALL year is affair season 
Dday -9/23/2012
Reconciled
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 10:39 PM on Tuesday, April 30th, 2013
It's a lousy time of year, all right.
Keep in mind:
It was never about you.
It was always about your W, and she's healing.
You're healing.
And your contract helps you both be in your M.
I wish you an easy A season.
(((lhap?)))
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
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