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FieldsOfLavender (original poster member #39154) posted at 4:41 AM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013
He says I am irrational and so angry. I said it's a normal reaction. It's been over a year since his relationship with his whore. He's supposed to move out this weekend and brought up signing the separation agreement. I asked that he add to the agreement that he will contribute to our dd's college fund. He says he will, but if he has other kids with OW, then my dd is shit out of luck. I'm unemployed but not asking for alimony. He doesn't have much in income or assets other than our house together, but I want to ensure that he is legally obligated to pay for our child's college.
I'm just venting now because we argued about it.
Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 10:58 AM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013
He's showing you who he is.
Protect yourself and your daughter. G for alimony and child support, and create your daughter's college fund yourself with his money.
Ow and her spawn can get in line.
You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright
KeepOnMovin ( member #38245) posted at 12:13 PM on Tuesday, June 4th, 2013
Here's how my friend explained it to me with respect to SS/CS. (Roles kind of reversed, keep in mind) "Only pay the minimum in CS/SS. Your spouse has shown she will spend every dime she takes in. Every dollar you pay in SS, is a dollar you are taking away from your kids and their future. Take that dollar you don't pay in SS and put that toward college."
For your case, your STBX is obviously thinking about his future kids with his whore rather than the one he actually has with you. Stop playing nice! If he won't commit to paying for college for your DD in the decree, get as much as you can in SS, and save it yourself for college.
Each dollar you don't see is a dollar he's taking away from your DD's future.
Me: Creating a better life for myself
Her: Somebody else's problem
Married: 22 years
2 sons at home
1 son in college
Divorced on 9/4/14!
Often it's the deepest pain which empowers you to grow into your highest self.
SkeerdButHopeful ( member #27541) posted at 1:04 AM on Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
Protect yourself and your daughter. G for alimony and child support, and create your daughter's college fund yourself with his money. Ow and her spawn can get in line.
I agree with Williesmom.
In my case, X is a total self-absorbed jackass. EVERYtime I've been nice to him, he has been totally ungrateful. In our divorce decree, I had them add that X didn't have to pay child support for the first three months after D was final because I felt sorry for him because he was trying to buy a car. Totally ungrateful. Although our D decree states that he is supposed to pay 1/2 of any extra-curricular activities, I haven't asked for a dime; however, he has asked me to help pay when anything that is his idea (theme park season passes, summer camp, guitar lessons).
When I told him I couldn't help out on these things, I got the meanest messages complaining about all the $ he was spending on CS and insurance for DD. I just told him to have his attorney contact my attorney if he didn't like it.
Your X may not be an ass like mine, but my advice is to get what you and your child are entitled to. He created this horrible situation. Make sure he is held responsible for his obligations.
Me BS48
XWH47 mentally unstable, NPD?
M 8 yrs. DD11
Dday 1/26/10
Divorced 2011 followed by extreme harassment disguised as concern for DD. Convicted 2012&2014.
Charges currently pending. Now "self employed" with no insurance or CS on D
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