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General :
Saw WH today, first time since he left us for AP

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 RedWheelBarrow (original poster member #38966) posted at 8:49 AM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

My WH looked so OLD and so TIRED and LONELY.

Long unkept gray hairs on his mostly-balding skull. Patchy ashy saggy face.

He says, "I miss you, Honey." He says, "I am so broke!" He says,"I never knew I would be this broke."

He wants to talk more. But I said I would not. Child or finances, that's it.

He really looks as if he's aged 2 years in 2 months.

Me: BW 50
Him:Peter Pan late 50's
DS: 13
Married 14 years, together 17 years
DDay #1 Nov.2012, plus more, more, more!
OW : 25 years younger

Divorced!

posts: 307   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2013   ·   location: NW
id 6370973
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MrsDoubtfire ( member #24786) posted at 8:58 AM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

He is living with the guilt of leaving your child and of leaving you. The fantasy bubble is starting to deflate the more he looks at the reality of his situation. What he thought was a glittering globe of excitement and lust was in actual fact just a semi inflated, bog standard common all garden party balloon. Everyone knows they either deflate over time or get burst in eager hands.

He will look old as the stress of reality starts to hit. There's the guilt he feels at leaving the M home and add into the mix any strife the OW is getting from her BH and you have a 'new relationship' that's starting on a foundation of strife and angst.

Hardly glitter unicorns jumping over rainbows.

Stay strong. Stick to finances and children. Sometimes it is during this period that the WS wakes up and sees the grass they thought was greenest was in fact just weeds and he may start longing for stability and reality which is in your M life.

He may or may not then beg to return. Only you know what you will do should this occur.

As for his calling you honey and telling you he's broke. Actions not words!

BS(Me) FWH(Him) DDay 05.09
A went underground. True R 02.10
I won't let another woman reap the benefit of enjoying the man my H has now become†

posts: 1634   ·   registered: Jul. 12th, 2009
id 6370975
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 9:04 AM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

A little regret ?

Too bad.

Not happy in O-whore land ?

Oh, well.

Really he thinks you would be stupid enough to be his back-up plan ?

Keep up your 180 and we'll see who is happy and living well.

I giggle everytime I think of FT having a baby (it's due in next couple months)with Twatwife. He's 74 and she is 40. Can you say colic, teething,and crying.

Happy it's him and not me.

Same goes for you XH, so happy it's not you !

Gma

[This message edited by gma56 at 11:32 AM, June 12th (Wednesday)]

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 6370976
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Faithful w/Love ( member #33128) posted at 2:44 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

Wow, he is really maybe seeing the light for what it is and the evilness of his heart to you and his child seem to be coming for him.

Gma, I love you but damn that is gross that your wh is 74 and having a baby. That baby will never know his dad most likely in adulthood. Do these dumb teat ows think? Or was she in it for $ also? Poor child.

BS(ME)41 WH(HIM)38
DD 21 and DS 16
Separated Aug 2012
Moved back home Oct 31 2013
Separated again June 2014. Heading toward divorce.
False R. Still Lying.

"You never know how strong you are until being strong is all you have left"

posts: 2947   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2011
id 6371147
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gma56 ( member #19595) posted at 5:31 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

T/J-

Or was she in it for $ also?

Can you say sugar daddy ? She's from Thailand and they live there now.

BW-Divorced
It's my life now, my choices, my mistakes to make and my victories to celebrate. His choices made me free of liars and betrayers in my life. That is priceless.

posts: 20502   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2008   ·   location: Closer to where I want to be..
id 6371413
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Ashland13 ( member #38378) posted at 5:37 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

Perv has changed appearance in that way, too, and is bigger in the belly, saggy eyes and other things. Unkempt looking.

Good for you, sticking to your guns with NC.

I notice sometimes lately he is also chatty and I try not to do any back.

He came to the house recently to leave DD off and lingered in the room, peeking at me, and I worked really hard to ignore him. It hurt a lot to do, but is what he brought on us, as yours did.

Good job, Red! And not easy.

Ashland 13

A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess

Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.

-George Washington

posts: 3034   ·   registered: Feb. 7th, 2013   ·   location: New England
id 6371428
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meplusfour ( member #38958) posted at 5:37 PM on Wednesday, June 12th, 2013

BOOM! Reality has just hit your WH. Stay strong Red, and keep moving forward with your child.

BW (me)42
WH 44
3 daughters, 1 son
Married 10 years, together 13
DDay 3/14/2013, four year PA
In R
"Sometimes you have to accept the fact that certain things will never go back to the way they used to be."

posts: 438   ·   registered: Apr. 11th, 2013   ·   location: Canada
id 6371429
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